While what I can say isn't from a trans perspective, chasing an 'ideal' is hopefully a universal enough experience that maybe this advice can still find some purchase...

To start, it is always wise to realize that "perfect" is subjective. What one person idolizes as an 11/10 is going to be someone's 7/10 or worse. While it is extremely important to feel comfortable in one's own skin, it is similarly important to realize that what you expect may not be realistic even if you were born exactly as you wished.

For an example of something closer to my wheelhouse (in hope that I can speak accurately); even if I still wanted to look like a ripped action figure from the 80s/90s, that 'look' comes with gross compromise. The people who do look like that are basically always on steroids (literally gender affirming hormone treatment) and doing all sorts of terrible things to their diet to keep their fat percentage so low. That's while they're still exercizing and etc, all which really drains on your energy levels even if you're eating healthy. It's a HUGE chore at the best of times, and a self-imposed death-curse at the worst of times.

Don't do that to yourself. PLEASE don't do that to yourself.

It's not fun. It's not even 'satisfying' outside of the few moments of adoration from those you're likely not being honest with. Like Arnold once said, "it's like cumming". Do you want to torture yourself just to 'get off' on those rare moments of adoration?

Something tells me if you're even making such a post, the answer is, "no".

So then what is the answer? The sad truth is, there isn't an easy answer. There are no "easy" solutions. You just need to figure out an "ideal" that is actually within your wheelhouse, and focus on that instead of the "perfect" example.

Not only will you be happier striving for something you can attain, you'll be more attractive to someone that won't be toxic for you.

Seek relationships that want to see you healthy, not just sticking to some crazy ideal. There is no better advocate than yourself for your own health, so learn to target what is healthy for you, and not what exists in some photoshopped poster.

Even if you're somehow the weirdest person in existence (and you're not), there is someone out there for which YOU are their ideal suitor. Find the people that will rizz you up for being a badass 'you'.