hiiiiii communists who live in my pc, do any of you know how to cook?
i don't. at all. a few days ago my roommate taught me how to scramble an egg, and i had never had broccoli or cauliflower or (most other vegetables ๐) until he let me try some of his, so that's approximately where i'm at with food knowledge. given that i'm clueless and live with several people in a completely open plan house, i try to avoid cooking anyway because i'm constantly being watched in the kitchen and people are making their little comments. BUT work is sending me traveling so i have a kitchen all to myself for 2 weeks and an affordable supermarket about 10 minutes walk away. i plan to use this time to try to learn a bit <3
the only problem is that i have absolutely no clue where to start. i can make rice and boil pasta and that's about it. do any of you have recipes that are accessible for a noob and will help me grind my skill up? 
or any idea of places online for my situation?
i have no dietary restrictions and i'm open to trying pretty much anything once. i'm just confused and every recipe i click on online seems to be some artisan shit that needs 2 hours and tools and ingredients i've never heard of
I started by using boxes of mix and following their instructions, then trying to recreate the mix myself. For example, one of my favorite meals growing up: Chili Macaroni Hamburger Helper. It's mix, macaroni, and then you add milk and hamburger and simmer it. Just following box instructions is enough for now if you're truly starting from zero knowledge, because you'll build confidence measuring, setting heat, monitoring, cracking eggs, checking cooking temps, chopping stuff, and so on, the absolute basics of the basics.
Last night I made a stew which is basically the same thing, except I chopped the chilis and other veggies myself to substitute for the mix, and I used TVP to substitute for the hamburger (you could also use beans for this purpose, or both), turning it into a from-scratch vegan alternative. It doesn't taste the same so I wouldn't call it a "replacement", but everything is subbed in for something similar enough so that the end result is well balanced in the same way that the original recipe is.
Food 'aint rocket science, and people have been making it purely on instinct for thousands of years. Granted, your instincts aren't perfect and you're gonna make mistakes, but your instincts are probably a lot better than you think they are and you can probably make more things than you "know" how to make just by putting the ingredients in a pot or pan with medium heat and sending it. Specific things like pressing tofu or safe cooking times you'll still want to look up, but I think getting into the "experimental mindset" is the most important thing of all.
Seconding the mixes. Nowadays you can get em for stuff like Indian and Cajun rice dishes, a lot are vegan or easily modified to be vegan too. Just add protein and rice, maybe some veggies if you're feeling fancy lol.
You can also do this with baking, there are a good number of desserts and even stuff like cornbread where you usually only need to add eggs/egg substitute and oil. Easy and tasty, if a little unhealthy.
Thirding this comment. This is what you want to do. Start getting stuff that's partially premade, and get comfortable doing the steps from the box. Hamburger helper type stuff is a great choice, or things like boxed mac and cheese. As you get more comfortable with it, start adding little touches to it (maybe a little extra pepper, or some hot sauce to taste, or steaming some broccoli and adding it to Mac and cheese). You'll get a feel for how a dish comes together, and as you get more confident, you can start looking up substitution recipes, and eventually move toward making things from scratch. A surprising number of "wet" recipes (sauces and the like) need some "dry" ingredients like flour or cornstarch to come together right. Using boxed stuff will get you used to seeing that transformation, but takes the guesswork out of measuring and lets you focus on first just making the pasta or browning the meat, and later on flavors. Don't try to do everything from scratch at first.