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smart bed (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
submitted 2 weeks ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
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[-] [email protected] 136 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

Look at this dumb asshole that got the $2500-2600 (assuming queen mattress) plus $17/mo or 199/yr subscription mattress cover (eg not the actual fucking mattress or bed frame). What a broke piece of shit. Should’ve gotten the $2850-2950 pod 6

After briefly googling what this actually is and the costs involved I have 0 sympathy for anyone involved. This is 100% tech bro bullshit. A temperature controlled bed sounds neat, I guess, and I am always a sucker for analytics, but this is possibly the most consumer hostile bullshit I have ever seen. It is all of the worst practices of modern tech wrapped into a device:

Grossly overpriced? Check

$350 upsell for physical controls? Check

Tons of vague language about health benefits that extrapolate valid claims onto their product, suggesting their product has benefits beyond something far cheaper (eg temperature does impact sleep but a $10 fan or $150 window unit would likely be fine because research is generally about environment and not about the surface of the bed)? Zero research about the device itself and zero funding for them to get this product investigated? Check

Subscription required? Not technically, core functionality still works, but you lose all the analytics, all the “smart adjustments” of temperature (it basically will just hold a constant temperature throughout the night whereas the subscription will adjust it gradually based on movement) and the biggest point is that your warranty is voided and you lose all support if you don’t maintain a subscription

Also while I don’t know this for sure I am betting there is 0 chance that you can fix this thing if it breaks.

This thing is so dumb and if you buy it I will judge you. You could buy a 2001 Honda accord LX with 141,000 miles. for that price. That’s a reliable car. I had one and drove it to 200k, sold it and I’m sure it ran for a while longer. Maintain it well and you’ll get 250-300k out of that bad boy. Meanwhile your dumb water bed cover will break and leak all over which is apparently so bad people all worry about all the posts theyve seen about leaking and the social media team has to come share blog post about how they make them less shitty now. sorry if you got the first batch, i guess. But it’s okay because as dumb redditors point out you can give them another $500 to extend the warranty to 5 years. Just remember to keep that subscription active or that warranty is void you stupid piece of shit.

you still need a fucking mattress! You know someone buying this isn’t throwing it on a $400 ikea mattress. They’re going for the $3200 foam mattress. I am so mad about this

Edit: it also sells the biometric data its harvests about you to advertisers. Reddit posts show it uploads anywhere from 10-30gb of data per month, so it’s collecting quite a bit of data

[-] [email protected] 43 points 2 weeks ago

tbh until I read ur comment I just assumed this was a shitpost tweet making fun of the state of consumer electronics, not a real product

I bought a gleeb for my glibben needs but it has no interoperability with floob, so I bought an adaptor from Amazon with a weird brand name made of plastic... etc etc

Just buy a blanket...?

[-] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago

This product is more for people that run hot during the night. Especially for couples where one runs hot and the other runs cold during the night. And the cold one doesn’t want to sleep with ac on all night. With this product the hot sleeper can just turn on the bed cooler on their side to cooldown. So a blanket wouldn’t help in that situation. There are other brands that don’t require internet or a subscription. And yes if you only buy this product to warm your mattress than you are stupid.

[-] [email protected] 6 points 2 weeks ago

Especially for couples where one runs hot and the other runs cold during the night.

Without elaborating too much, this is my situation, and we solve this by having the room cold for him and blankets for me. Actually, the situation is much better when our insurance stops jerking us around about his medication that fixes his night sweating and other related problems, but we're American, so can't be helped.

It just seems like a lot of trouble when you can buy a blanket idk.

Honestly, I'm the one paying for a subscription service that doesn't help (insurance), so I guess I'm the clown here.

[-] [email protected] 1 points 2 weeks ago

Well I did say that this is for people that don't like to have the AC on all night, like when the cold sleeper keeps complaining about a cold head or the noise. Like not everyone lives in the US where HVAC is the norm many people in the world have those big AC units hanging on the wall that can be pretty noisy.

[-] [email protected] 1 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

Those things aren't too bad unless they need repair/replace....meanwhile you are recommending a solution that starts at like $2500 that only works while you're in the bed.

Most of the USA has HVAC, but not everyone. I grew up without it. We had in-window units and box fans. You get used to it quickly.

I'm sorry, I'm just not seeing this as anything but an expensive luxury (that doesn't have physical buttons unless u paid???). Seems pretty silly to pretend its anything but that.

[-] [email protected] -1 points 2 weeks ago

Than is not then

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this post was submitted on 18 Jun 2025
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