this post was submitted on 14 May 2025
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What the fuck. In your mind every single sexual encounter is all participants using each other as objects for personal pleasure? That has not been my experience, and my guess is it isn't the experience of most people who have sex. Sex should be mutually pleasurable and is something you do collaboratively with other people. It's not getting your own pleasure regardless of how your partner(s) feel, it's everyone involved working together to try and make the experience good for everyone.
Do you think every physical act is about objectification? When I, say, play tennis with someone, are we objectifying each other then too? What about when I cuddle with my partner? When we both go in for a hug because we want to experience that physical closeness? Is that objectification? Am I "using him" every time I hug my partner?
Also, I don't hate your position on sex, I'm being sincere when I say you don't have to like it or engage with it, ever, for any reason. That's fine, there's really no issue there. All I'm saying is that some people (me included) like sex, and it's a little odd to be told I'm using my partner as an object every time we get intimate. That's really weird, and not at all what's happening.