It's kinda funny thinking about the stigma around cisnormative men listening to music (especially pop) performed by women. (hexbear.net)

submitted 2 years ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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I was kinda on a nostalgia trip and I stumbled on Jennifer Lopez's Waiting for Tonight, and it's basically about how she wants to fuck her partner. It could be more romantic in nature, and for some people it is, but looking at the repression in the West, it's very racy for its time.

But I ask: Why is it considered bad for straight men to want to listen to a song about how a woman wants to fuck? Volcel Pledge, notwithstanding.

I mean I know the answer is systemic misogyny, but like it doesn't even make sense?

It's so bizarre to me as a queer person attracted to men that men and boys are discouraged from listening to musicians who are women.

I'd have loved growing up with musicians I'm attracted to who were attracted to my gender.

I sorta want to explore this experience as an outsider, but I'm curious, what was that like? Did you listen to artists you liked in secret? How are your music tastes now? Any recommendations on music that feels different on a revisit?

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[-] [email protected] 4 points 2 years ago

Idk if we're only talking about pop music here, but coming from playing in bands for many years, it's such a boys club, especially in niche genres. The funniest part is cishet man promoters doing shit like "female fronted metal fest" which in their minds is all good an progressive but in reality it only serves to objectify and isolate women in music more bc it's presented as a novelty

[-] [email protected] 2 points 2 years ago

Yeah the 'girls night' approach to inclusion can be pretty bad. That's funny you mention cishet men promoting these events and so it's already setting the tone for women before they even perform.

I never even considered that angle until you brought it up. This thread has been pretty eye opening about the pervasive ways music is gendered.

this post was submitted on 10 Aug 2023

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