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I understand that, I've tried CBT and it's impossible for it to help me because it fundamentally depends on accepting you are helpless and doesn't properly get people in the mindset required to change their lives and society for the better.
If I actually want to give a shit about myself then that's not something I can DELUDE myself into accepting.
The delusion I'd rather hold onto is that my life will get better, becauase in that delusion there's at least a happy ending. I have a hard time believing that though.
I wouldn't call it a delusion. But I understand where you're coming from. Certainly if someone doesn't want to change anything about themselves then therapy won't change them by force, it's just not something an ethical practice would ever do. However, on psychology we start from the premise that changing oneself is the first step at changing one's circumstances. Things don't get better by wishful thinking or spontaneously, change requires actions, and thoughts precede actions. Expecting different results from the same behaviors and thought patterns is, itself, a delusion.