Parents made me perform a Christmas bible reading and a prayer knowing I'm not Christian/religious (hexbear.net)

submitted 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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CW Rant with some discussion of familial trauma, religion, mention of substance use

I drove over 6 hours to see them and be present for the holidays and they went out of their way to cross my boundaries and make me uncomfortable. I didn’t want to be rude when they put me on the spot so I read the verses they wanted to humor them, but then they asked me to lead a fuckin prayer. They are aware I’m an atheist and resent that fact; I try to respect their beliefs but they push theirs onto me like this. I said a short prayer to get out of this whole situation and my mom started crying and smiling huge like I was just converted. Feel so weird and gross about this. They roped my partner into participating too and they’re of the same mind as me on these things so it made us both uncomfortable and anxious.

This incident was just icing on the cake of a trip full of my emotionally abusive mother starting constant arguments, my family trying to get me to drink knowing I’m sober, and being around my siblings one of whom is I’ll just say an abusive shithead. I don’t think I’ll bother going next year. I recall vividly why I was hyped to move out and why I don’t call more often. The neglect, manipulation, and abuse of years in that household all came flowing back. No wonder i deal with so much mental health shit lol

Edit: sorry if initial phrasing doesn’t convey the reason the prayer got me but it’s because I left Christianity due to the institutional abuses I experienced and witnessed, not just because I’m not religious these days. I just got put on the spot and due to family history went fight or flight and compromised my needs to get out of there asap. Really just needed to vent abt this didn’t want to spark confusion or debate sorry

Sorry for the rant just wanted to vent to my cool internet stranger friends

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[-] [email protected] 15 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago)

You'll feel a lot better when you set those boundaries but it took me many years after moving out to do it. I let my parents push me around for years with emotional manipulation and constant guilt tripping until one day i actually told them how they made me feel... The intention was to get them to see my perspective but what happened was my mum had a massive meltdown and went fully into denial then decided to flip it around and make me the problem lol so i gave them the middle finger and haven't spoken to them in 2 years.

The part that hurt the most was my dad telling me he now likes my mum again after i went because he and i quote "doesn't have to see her being mean to me"....

Upside is the chronic anxiety i had since I was like 7 just up and vanished as if i never had it to begin with

this post was submitted on 26 Dec 2024

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