Stole it off of reddit
this post was submitted on 17 Nov 2024
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IDK man, the people with no or few friends tend to be weird but not really bad in any meaningful way: socially awkward, shy, odd interests, neurodivergent etc. Difficult to get to know, plain and simple. People with a lot of friends are often worse people, manipulative and/or have a transactional attitude to relationships
*Raises hand*
Yeah I'd like to think I'm not a bad person. I just have intense social anxiety. The only way I've made friends are when chatty people tend to talk to me and invite me to things. I've always appreciated when people do this, but then I just don't retain the friendship when I or they have moved across the country or when we've moved into different life stages (ex: graduating from high school or college or changing jobs). I'm fortunate enough to have a friend now who is just nice and talks to me. Prior to that I didn't have anyone for a while outside of my online friends. Some of us are really just terrified of other human beings is all.
Part of this is that I have always an intense paranoia of appearing too clingy, so I never invite anyone else out to do things. Notice how one of the commenters said they broke off a friendship because the other person was too clingy. Well I just break it off first by never engaging because I don't want them to think I'm too clingy or weird. Even now with the one friend I have I fear that I text too much or bother them too much or things like that. I try to limit myself and leave them alone but I never know where the line is between never speaking and between speaking too much.
So I just chill alone I guess.
Just be chill
I rarely do anything with people I know. I'm not a super social person and I tend to keep to myself. I tend to hang with people that I either know very well or that I work do something with.
Idk man, the people with no friends and the people with a lot of friends and even the people with a middle amount of friends seem to follow a standard distribution of personalities.
Some awkward people and some charismatic people just suck. Some awkward people and some charismatic people are awesome. But most of all, people are just kinda shades of in-between.
Yeah I don't think it's really fair for anyone to be generalizing people over the number of friends they have. There are shitty and no shitty people in both camps.
When I was in high school there was only one kid with no friends and he was racist
At least he wasn't the popular kid
Same. It was in the Tennessee suburbs so there was actually a lot of racism, but dude was like, Klan level racist, and that's just rude.
And when it's not any of those cases then that person has a horrible pattern of behavior. I've learned this lesson way too hard.