this post was submitted on 09 Nov 2024
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Sorry for seriousposting, but there is one good thing that comes from NoFap, and that is opposing the colloquial assumption that "you just need to get laid" or "you need to just go rub one off", the reductive and idiotic assumption that people's behavior is entirely traceable to how much they do the sex thing. You'd think that we'd gotten rid of the last intact vestiges of Freudianism decades ago.
Or am I wrong and my demi brain is the exception to the rule?
I feel like unfortunately a lot of no-fappers are coming at this from a "I need to stop jacking off so I can get laid" angle, so it still comes back to sex, they love talking about how it made them more confident when talking to women.
It would certainly be nice if there were communities that actually did this though. We unironically need to have secular monastic orders, say what you will about organized religion as an institution but monks and nuns were a great idea.
I think NoFap is a reaction to porn addiction. In that sense, NoFap appears to be about abandoning the simulation of emotional, romantic, and sexual intimacy and its hijacking of the pleasure centers of the brain and mind's self-deception of having romantic intimacy via said media.
I don't know much of it, but it just seems that people in the modern era struggle with respect for women/men/people outside their sexual dominions, romantic prospects, self-respect, rediscovery of the self, emotional growth, and maturity and find bizarre communities like this in their journey via self-help.
Look at me now, I'm unalienated from myself and from others! but by identifying and compartmentalizing sex/porn addiction as the cause.
Secular monasticism is a great idea. Probably even better than any "leftist hustle culture" that grinds for the revolution.
There's something to be said for a mind-over-matter approach, cultivating mental fortitude. But I feel that centering it on the sexual inclination is defeating the point of it. Instead of the focus being on the self that is broadly strengthened, it is on sexuality as a demon that must be tamed.
The inversion of NoFap just reifies all the same assumptions.
Unfortunately I think if secular monastaries became a thing they would all quickly turn into corporate hells where you wear robes instead of a collared shirt.