this post was submitted on 11 Oct 2024
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[–] [email protected] 144 points 1 month ago (3 children)

Great until it grabs some skin or hair

[–] [email protected] 98 points 1 month ago (3 children)

sleeps in the nude

Nutsack gets pinched

[–] [email protected] 95 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Everyone knows you're supposed to wear a gambeson beneath your chainmail. Leather or padded cloth is best.

Ergo, full body gimp suit before bed

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 month ago

Oh good so I just need the chainmail.

[–] [email protected] 26 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 month ago (2 children)

A not quite twenty year old thread where a guy got his nuts pinched in a chair and asked the internet for help

https://www.fark.com/comments/2018473/Im-stuck-to-my-chair-Im-so-very-scared-Help-Details-In-thread

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (2 children)

It seems very likely that I don't want to click that, but I appreciate the clarification.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I can confirm that’s the source. Don’t worry about clicking it, most of the images are lost to time.

Which is a shame. It was hilarious.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago

Maybe we should have some kind of archive of the internet so this isn't a concern! Oh wait.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

Its okay really. Funny as hell at the time but none of image links have survived.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Remember the streetlight thread? That was another great one

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

There were a lot of good ones there. Then it enshitified. They started playing favorites and I left.

[–] [email protected] 33 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

Have you ever worn chainmail without an undershirt? Or gambeson? It feels neat at first. Never had to worry about pinching. It didn't grab any hair. The metal will feel cool and smooth all night. But oh Lord, the awful pain it will bring to unprotected virgin nipples. Like surfing for a hundred years without a rash guard all in one hedonistic night concentrated on the area less than two dimes. NEVER AGAIN. A couple bandaids or pasties the next time and all is good.

I think you'll be fine with just a top sheet between you and the chainmail.

[–] [email protected] 26 points 1 month ago (1 children)

So what you're saying is, he needs to add nipple holes!

[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago

This explains the lesser known war cry of

"Don't fire until you see the pink of their nips"

[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

ill buzz my entire body for the heatsinking properties of aluminium, on this infernal heat

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago

And cover your nipples with bandages.