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[Volcel Police Violation] Are you supposed to fondly remember the first time you had sex or is that just a meme? (hexbear.net)

submitted 3 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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I just realised that "like it's your first time" has a positive connotation I guess, but like... motherfucker? Do most people have non-awful first-time experiences of sex? Between garbage sex ed and cisheteronormativity I just can't imagine. I doubt it was even momentous for most people tbh? Idk.

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[–] [email protected] 11 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (2 children)

Ehhh... For the first "attempt," I knew what I was doing, but I really should have spent some more time making sure she was relaxed than what I did. Access to lube would have been a huge help, too. Leaning in for a kiss while trying to push inside was a huge mistake and I almost got my tongue bitten off for my trouble. She may have joined the Evangelical version of a convent several years later.

As I said, memorably bad.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 months ago

literally doing God's work timmy-pray

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Lmao that's a funny punchline, sorry it was bad though yea

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 months ago

I wish I were joking. She went from being an atheist/agnostic to becoming a freaking minister. The American midwest and its consequences have been a disaster for the human race, etc.