I'm stealing that.

Send shoes, I have chiggers on the bottoms of my feet.

Ah yes, the legendary vampenis, who doesn't wanna put one in em'?

Vanilla? Is it really you?

30 years old, and well on my way to be a part of that esteemed club.

My favorite part about this is that many of these Sherman tank drivers come speeding behind me and then when they're a car's length from me, veer over into another lane, leaving the car behind them(who had been matching their speed) with the nasty little surprise of my car, which had been completely invisible to them a second ago.

Very true. I was born in Brazil and thus learned Portuguese as my first language. Then moved to the US when I was five. My parents sat me down in my grandparent's basement and taught me English, it had to be done quick as school was starting very soon. Many years later I would return to Brazil and spent three months there. Starting with crude vocabulary and building it up as I went, over hundreds of interactions. The best way to learn a language, is out of necessity. Whether it really does hinge on you being able to communicate with others or if self-imposed. I wish more people saw it as something that must be done. Unfortunately, Google Translate enables laziness.