2003 vs. 2017. Maybe we're headed back in the right direction.

You get hit by a driverless taxi. The monkey paw curls one finger towards its palm.

Odd. This is exactly why I had to stop drinking Windex.

I mean the title really gave it away

Did he live up to his name, or did his name damn him to a lifetime of dingus decisions?

The answer is yes.

Don't forget the 11th commandment.

"Thou shalt consider the supreme law of the land as mere suggestion, for thy personal whim shall outweigh the parchment of the founders."

I commend the piracy of Harry Potter books though.

If anything happens at all it will be multi-billion dollar corporations getting checks from the government

That's not what I'm talking about but okay

I'm not blaming smartphones solely. I said screens. I'm blaming news media for fear-mongering. It's a constant barrage of either pro-trump or things you should be afraid of trump doing.

Go outside and take care of your community.

Yeah! No more gay stuff! We want America stuff! Like raping children stuff.

Calling it now. He killed her.