this post was submitted on 29 Feb 2024
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Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

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[–] [email protected] 140 points 8 months ago

This is what happens when your social adolescence happens in an unmoderated forum where the edgiest edgelad wins attention.

[–] [email protected] 134 points 8 months ago (13 children)

anon finds out they are autistic

[–] [email protected] 24 points 8 months ago

Or it is time to have that ADHD diagnosed.

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[–] [email protected] 87 points 8 months ago (4 children)

Real life shock to learn the empathy that online interactions lack.

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[–] [email protected] 70 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Women, "I miscarried last week, my husband and I have been trying for years and we really thought this was it."

Men, "You think that's bad? Have you been to the DMV?".

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[–] [email protected] 55 points 8 months ago (3 children)

Poor anon. Should've said that research found miscarriages to be more common than previously believed and that this specific one likely wasn't the first and definitely not the last.
It's these little details that make all the difference...

[–] [email protected] 61 points 8 months ago (3 children)

"I know this is awful, but it'll probably happen again."

I don't know, chief. Probably not the best approach.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 8 months ago

Comment was sarcastic and dunking on op for being socially stunted.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 8 months ago

Look on the bright side, now you and hubby can have your DNA tested and find out how incompatible you are and that you have about a 25% chance of producing a healthy offspring. Yay, knowledge!

[–] [email protected] 4 points 8 months ago

Well thynk you, now everybody knows I'm not working on the task at hand.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Depending on the woman, this will either help, or shatter them.

The actual odds are around 50% self abort. Mostly within the first month. 10-20% happen between 1 and 3 months. Critically, almost none of the risk is down to the mother. It just happens.

I couldn't get the fear out of my wife's mind on this. All I could do was quantify it, and lay the groundwork that it wasn't her fault if the pregnancy failed.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 8 months ago (3 children)

When I had a colleague who had 3 heartbreaks, and she was expecting her 4th we treated her with proper kid gloves, no carrying, no stress. It felt like a team effort.

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 8 months ago

It's best to just drop the factoids and offer emotional support in situations like this.

[–] [email protected] 32 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Anon tries to be Jerry Seinfeld

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[–] [email protected] 19 points 8 months ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 46 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Department of motor vehicles.

Kraftfahrzeug-Zulassungsbehörde

[–] [email protected] 4 points 8 months ago

Sehr edel Zuhausi.

[–] [email protected] 23 points 8 months ago

Department of motor vehicles.

Notoriously a long line you have to stand in to get your drivers license.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 8 months ago

Their fam is partying it up in the dmv line

[–] [email protected] 5 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Lol anon's a dumbass. I work in healthcare and miscarriages are pretty common and for most people it's pretty easy to get pregnant again, by the story she wasn't admitted to the hospital so the pregnancy couldn't be very far. So it's not that big of a deal. That said, even if it isn't a big deal if you see someone crying you don't crack jokes lol. Have some tact and empathy. All that if the story was real, which it isn't.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 8 months ago

The problem was the joke sucked. He should have reported her for murder to the government of Alabama, as a prank.

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