Asklemmy

I misunderstood what "war machine" meant.

I heard phrases on TV like "it cost $1 billion dollars per month to keep the war machine running" and "the US captured 100,000 barrels of oil per day to feed the war machine" and I thought this thing must be some epic beast.

The terrorists better watch out! We're sending the war machine! It must have, like, sawblade hands and tank tracks and breathe fire and have machine gun turrets.

Imagine my disappointment when I learned that THE WAR MACHINE was just a metaphor and not a Mecha Godzilla

Why the emojis? Use your words.

When reading books about Robin Hood: "Robin Hood hated bloodshed"

I thought it was a literal shed. Where people fought and bled inside.

"Dumbledore, I'm afraid you've just put the students in danger one too many times. We're going to have to sack you; then you'll be asked to resign."

5th grade. I knew what cloning was, but had never heard the word “Cyclone” until an ill-fated English lesson at school.

I actually raised my hand and asked the teacher why she was referring to a tornado using a term for genetic replication. She didn’t know, “Genetic Replication”.

There’s awkward, then there’s that moment. 🤦

This post is one cluster fuck of misunderstanding

Trying to read the word "raucous" out loud for the first time. I came up with something like "raw-shus".

I thought the word faucet was both pulled and pronounced flaucet until I was 18. Nobody ever called me on it for some reason.

I chalk it up to dyslexia and the infrequency of encountering the word.

Why does this have so many down votes? Am I missing something?