I will say though, there's something about not trying which has always worked for me. Desperation and confidence are incompatible. That's why it's so much easier to flirt with people when you're in a relationship already, because the stakes are low. You're relaxed and confident because you (probably) aren't trying to actually hook up. I've seen this so many times in both directions - the same jokes, the same anecdotes, that same weird laugh - all somehow land better the moment you are just goofing around instead of trying to pick someone up.

I just throw them in a sack and take them back to my place. Got two wives that way. Git gud incel.

thanks to the modern economics, it's not like there's many parties anyway and a drink in a bar costs more than my food for the whole day. plus we let big tech psychos convince us that the paid online dating trap is the way to go. the only people that cold approach me are street shysters and crackheads in the train station, and i like to be left alone in public, so i assume everyone else does too. you're probably out because you have stuff to do and not just walking around aimlessly, right?

then everyone in college already has their friend group, barging in feels like intruding. if you find someone you have stuff in common with and you don't have mainstream social media, you're likely dead to them. then you start a job and get locked in an office cubicle forever.

if you choose to play anyway, make sure you're not homosexual, or heavens forbid, trans or asexual. you'd be playing the game on hardmode!

Hey, I was raised on the premise that women want to be left alone and be independent which taught me that there is no environment or time where an approach would be appreciated. In return I assumed that in time and when ready, they would be the ones to initiate. Guess they really haven't held up their end of the bargain. Or maybe I'm just a dumb fool for assuming that.

My partner of 16 years basically told a mutual friend that she liked me and then the friend did all the logistical stuff.

The Redditor maneuver

I'm the type who when I'm not in a relationship long enough I start to think maybe I want one, but then I remember what it's like to be in one, and remind myself not to be so delusional. I'm very much happier being 'alone'. Not that I'm actually alone. I have non-romantic relationships. I will admit having two incomes would be nice tho.

I'm not going to make another person suffer through a relationship with me. I'm horrrible and very difficult to be with!

All of my best relationships started that way. I was just going about my life, and some girl decides to chase me down

In the words of my ex, "I saw you and decided I had to get to know you"

Hasn't happened in a while, but I should probably get out more