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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Dizzy-Rentan on 2026-08-08 01:51:23+00:00.

A few years ago I came across a curious item in a friend’s bathroom. One of those little stools to prop yourself up in a squatting position. After clumsily propping myself up on it I gave it a minute and safe to say it felt like my whole life I’d been defecating half-assed. Since then I have yet to sit down to poop. If a toilet doesn’t have a bidet and stool I usually hold it or find a way to make do (wet wipes and a hammer squat on the toilet itself).

Fast forward to me pooping at my girlfriends for the first time. I notice that she is yet to be enlightened on the excretion essentials and her toilet is lacking the stool. No matter. I decide to squat on the toilet itself as I’ve grown accustomed to. I didn’t expect her to come in the bathroom since we were watching a show in another room but she needed to get something from the medicine cabinet.

We make eye contact and it feels like my heart is going to be the next thing plopping out my ass. “What’re you doing?!” I hastily explain that this is the way humans are meant to shit but the knowledge is lost in a sea of incorrigible laughter.

Can my relationship survive this?

TL;DR: got caught by my girlfriend using a regular toilet in the squat position