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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/aftenbladet on 2026-02-17 08:42:40+00:00.
(AI free with the spelling and formating mistakes of a non native speaker)
My danish friend love to go camping here in Norway, and especially if its freezing. Well Im the guy that never says no, so thats how we end up some weird places.
This weekends camping location was set in beautiful Jøssingfjord, in a closed off road tunnel with a nice view down the fjord. I bet you can find it if you google it.
Everything was going great. We had just gotten a good fire going, cooked our butchers sausages and even had a little stamp on the tounge for good measure. Then I felt it..
It was the all too familiar bubling and gargling in the lower back. You know what Im talking about, we have all felt it. And we all know all to well what must happen next.
I quickly went trough my options with my friend. He welcomed me to take this horrid dump in the very tunnel we were staying. Claiming it was windy and even snow in the air outside. So tunnel was better than nothing.
Luckily enough, when parking for the night I spotted a little red building at a viewpoint only 350m away. I mustered up some courage, sad goodbye and started wadling up there in my winter gear, butcheeks clenched.
It was such a good feeling to spot the little outhouse between snowflakes drifting. It was only 350m uphill, but being the master of my brown star for that distanse felt like a victory.
I did however discover some issues. The outhouse door lock was not in great shape. I couldnt manage to open the door at first. It seemed they even secured it with a wooden board and a few screws.
I looked over my shoulder, into the cold snowy weather, calculated my options and then proceeded to rip that board off and enteret what was, at the time, heaven.
Im talking heated room, automatic lighting, stainless and clean.
I happily undressed my endless layers of winter clothing, sat down and unleashed the beast within me. I wont get into any details, as Im sure you have seen and felt it yourself a few times.
I didnt mind the smell, sounds and even the cleanup was completely fine. Because I knew being hunched over in a tunnel doing the same would be a nightmare.
It was all going so very well. I just had to reach back to flush and CLICK.. nothing. What the hell. CLICK CLICK CLICK.
It dawned on me. The boarded door, the cleaning list being last signed in October. It was still very clean, at least before I sat down.
Christ, they shut off the water for the winter. Its probably to prevent the supply from freezing.
There was no way back. I couldnt scoop the partialy solid feces up and throw it out. No, I just had to be that guy. The guy the cleanup crew will swear at, maybe even puke after it all have been sitting in a heated room all winter until spring. Just fermenting shit mixed with TP.
For that I am very sorry, but I would do it all again. In a heartbeat.
TL:DR Had to break into an outhouse for code brown, realized too late there was no water to flush with and that I probably broke a law or two when entering.
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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/jearu573 on 2026-02-17 08:14:26+00:00.
Those who know me know my brain-to-mouth filter dissolves in a hurry when I am inebriated, severely annoyed, or just plain tired.
Monday morning, after my usual 12 hour shift, I was stranded at work 'til someone picked up my Uber request. I got off at 5 AM, picked up around 9ish.
The man who picked me up had the most beautiful long wavy ash-blond hair, and I commented on it. He thanked me. Innocent enough, yeah?
I then proceeded to let slip that I wondered what it would look like spread out over my pillows.
Things got REAL quiet.
I closed my eyes, burning absolutely scarlet, and said, "I said that out loud, didn't I."
He chuckled and simply said "Yep!" in quite a cheerful tone.
I think it's safe to say he'll not pick me up again.
TL:DR: I accidentally hit on my Uber driver.
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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/tapepepper569 on 2026-02-17 07:08:04+00:00.
I’m still sort of hysterically laughing off and on; it’s been quite a wild couple hours. So I’m a college student, and at the beginning of last year I really wanted to find a strong Christian community and good church to go to. (Lesser motive, I wanted to be around Christian guys too in case something would happen to bloom).
And I end up finding this really nice organization that has a good church with a *lot* of college students. Like, very focused on college ministry. And so I start going, and it’s really nice, but then I start noticing some red flags. I keep thinking it’s fine, and anyways the food and fellowship are really good. It’s not a dealbreaker or anything really serious seeming.
So I just keep trucking along for a good chunk of the year, getting closer with everyone. (Not going into a whole lot of detail about the red flags or the system itself just because it’s pretty distinctive/privacy reasons).
But then my family comes to visit me, and obviously I took them to church yesterday. It’s a “normal” service and all seems well. Everyone is welcoming, etc etc.
Then today my sister and mom inform me that they did some research because they got weird vibes and it is actually a cult. Like, has a whole subreddit and articles culty cult.
So now I have to leave and deal with whatever this is about and just kinda work through the feelings, plus the fact that I kinda wasted months of my life. And through it all; I am still as single as ever.
TLDR: I wanted a boyfriend so bad I almost drank the Kool-Aid
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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Eleja_Jihio on 2026-02-17 00:31:35+00:00.
so... i live in this kinda busted apartment building in milwaukee where the walls are thinner than paper and everyone acts like they are chill until the second you inconvenience them
my upstairs neighbors are loud. like, not just music loud. like, headboard, yelling, the whole fucking thing. it usually happens around midnight and yknow, im not even mad at the sex part, i am mad at the very fact that i have to be up at 6 in the morning for my ceiling to sound like its being punched
my friend told me to stop being a pussy and just leave a note. so i did. tried to be nice abt it and everything. wrote something like "heyyyyy, guys, i can hear everything, could yall please keep it down after 11? thx xoxo, your nrighbor"
here is the fuck up. my building has a community board by the mailboxes, and i thought it would be funny to make it anonymous and casual, like a little building psa. so instead of slipping it under their door, i pinned it to the board.
but i did not just pin the note.
i also, for some godforsaken fucking reason, added examples. like i was trying to prove i was not exaggerating. i wrote stuff like the bed hitting the wall, the screaming, the part where someone kept yelling "HARDER, HARDER". i even wrote the exact time stamps cuz i had looked at my phone at 12 47 when i woke up annoyed.
i go to work, forget about it, come home, and there are like eight people crowded around the board reading it like it is the damn newspaper. one lady is doing that tight smile thing like she is trying not to laugh. the old guy from 2b is nodding like he is sherlock holmes himself. someone took a photo of it. i know they did because i saw the screen.
then the upstairs guy comes down in gym shorts and flip flops, and he sees it, and his face does that looked like he saw a ghost thing. he rips the note off the board and goes who wrote this creepy shit.
and i should have shut up. i should have walked away.
instead i said i mean, i can hear you, man. everybody can.
he starts arguing, saying i am obsessed, saying i am jealous, saying i am basically listening on purpose and getting off of it. his girlfriend shows up behind him and she is bright red and furious, but not at him, at me. she says i did it to embarrass her and she is not wrong tbf.
now half the building knows their schedule and apparently a couple other neighbors also hate them, so my note turned into a whole thing. like people are now leaving their own notes. one says buy a rug. another says stop screaming. someone drew a stupid little bed on the board.
upstairs couple has been stomping around on purpose all weekend. i am pretty sure they are dropping weights. i have never felt so petty and so guilty at the same time.
TL;DR: i was annoyed by my upstairs neighbors loud rough late night sex, tried to be anonymous, and pinned a titsy-bitsy note on the building community board, describing their sex life in details to the whole building. now the whole building is involved and i might just have to start a neighbor feud atp.
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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/CanadianRoboOverlord on 2026-02-16 13:40:29+00:00.
Obligatory- this happened this past Saturday.
So, this weekend I was on a trip to another city to hang out with a beautiful girl I met online.
Naturally, I'm going to forget something when I go traveling, and this time it was razors.
No problem, I say to myself. I'll just grab some disposables from the local dollar store and it'll all be good.
So, the next morning, before I'm supposed to meet up with the girl that I'm seeing, I pop over to a local dollar store and pick up what I think are some half decent disposable razors. Then, I head on back to the hotel I'm staying at to get ready for our date.
Now before I go on, I should tell you that I'm used to a fairly high-end razor that doesn't require a lot of soap, and gives me the occasional nick but not very often. So, I use some of the hotel soap which doesn't lather well, and I get to shaving.
I can feel it pulling and nicking me a tiny bit, but I thought it should be fine.
Then, after I'm done shaving, I wander off to the next room to start getting dressed and ready because I know she's coming pretty soon.
She texts and says she'll be there in a few minutes and I tell her no problem.
Then, I wander back into the bathroom, and discover the horror of what I have just done. I have just cut the shit out of my face, and basically along my neck and lips it's bleeding like crazy.
I have a fucking beard of blood pouring down my face right before I'm supposed to meet up for a breakfast date!
shit shit shit
I start to panic and try wiping it off, only to discover that the water is making things worse, not better, and it's bleeding even more crazily.
Ding goes my phone - "Hey! I'm here!'
I text back that I'll meet her down in the lobby, and take a moment to think. There's no way I can go down there looking like this, but how do I stop all this blood?
Then a thought occurs to me- ice! I need ice to constrict the veins and get the bleeding to stop.
So in a panic, I dash out the door to go find the hotel ice machine. Naturally, there's a maid outside in the hallway, and she sees me looking like Hammer Dracula who has just gone to town on some village girl.
Her eyes go wide and she gasps as she looks at me, but at this point I don't really care. I just muttered something about being sorry, and boot it down the hallway to find that ice machine.
Luckily for me, the machine is on my floor, so I scoop up handfuls of ice from the machine, and go running back to my room. Once I get back there, I text the girl that I'm going to be a little late, and start applying the ice to my neck and face.
My hands hurt from the ice, but I just don't care. I need this bleeding to stop and stop right away.
And to my absolute joy, it works!
First the ice, and then I use a towel that's soaked in cold water to clean things off very gently. Yeah, there's still a little bit of blood coming from a few spots but they're tiny.
Eventually, my mouth looks okay and the skin on my neck is a bit red, but it's okay. I clean up, and I head down to apologize to my date for being a bit late. I make a joke about cutting myself shaving, she laughs, and everything goes well.
And that's how I reenacted a horror scene in a hotel hallway. Enjoy!
TL;DR - used a cheap razor to turn my face into a beard of blood before a date and turned myself into the story of the day for some hotel cleaner.
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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Agile-Wind-4427 on 2026-02-16 16:39:39+00:00.
So yeah… this was yesterday.
I’ve been talking to this girl for a few weeks. We text every day, flirt a bit, sent each other dumb memes, even talked about going out “soon.” In my head, it felt obvious we were heading somewhere.
Valentine’s Day came up and we never had a direct conversation about it, but I figured it was implied. So I got her a small gift and some flowers. Nothing huge. Just something sweet.
I showed up to surprise her.
She opened the door looking confused. Not mad. Just confused. She thanked me, but then said she actually had plans. With someone she’s been seeing.
Apparently we were just “talking.” Not dating. Not exclusive. Just talking.
She wasn’t rude about it, which almost made it worse. I felt like an absolute idiot standing there holding flowers while she explained it.
Now I’m replaying every conversation wondering how I convinced myself we were further along than we were.
Communication would’ve saved me a lot of embarrassment.
TL;DR: Thought I was her Valentine because we’d been talking a lot. Showed up with flowers. Found out I was just an option.
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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/skipperthepenguin191 on 2026-02-16 13:19:28+00:00.
At 4 this morning I felt something wet on my pants. I'm on my period and have bled through a tampon before in the night so I thought it was just my own blood. I then felt something of substance. Think small, wet, and slimy. Somehow in my sleepy haze I thought it was my tampon that had miraculously fallen out. No- it was a hair ball from my cat. Upon using a flashlight the liquid wasn't red, it was brown. Puke brown. I had touched a hairball and been sleeping in puke for who knows how long. I just cleaned my sheets too. Thank you to my boyfriend who quickly cleaned everything while I showered. I'd also like to add I'm running a slight fever from a cold so I think that had something to do with my haziness. My cat and I are not speaking at the moment -_-
TLDR: my cat puked on me in the night and I thought it was my period until shining a light on it only after touching it.
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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/KimK_Madison on 2026-02-15 20:13:10+00:00.
So I workED at this small car dealership in Reno, Nevada. Nothing fancy just me three other sales guys, and our manager Rick who thinks he is a wolf of wall street but drives a busted Tacoma
We got this new receptionist last month. 22, quiet always reading during lunch. I decided I was gonna be that mysterious confident dude not the usual clown version of me. I watched a bunch of cringe alpha male garbage and thought yeah less talking, more eye contact act like I have options.
Here is where I cooked myself
I started ignoring her on purpose like full on hot and cold. One day super friendly next day barely looking at her I thought it would make me seem busy and high value or whatever
Instead she went to Rick and said I was making her uncomfortable.
I did not even know that part yet
yesterday Rick calls me into his office. He has this weird disappointed dad face he tells me there has been feedback about my behavior. says I am acting hostile and creating tension.
I panic my brain goes into survival mode. Instead of saying sorry and explaining I was just being awkward and stupid I double down.
I tell him she is the one acting weird and maybe she is projecting because she likes me yes I actually said that.
Rick just stared at me like I had grown a second head. He tells me this is not high school and that he cannot have drama in the front office.
This morning I get called in again. They are letting me go. Official reason not a good culture fit
All because I tried to play some dumb psychological game instead of just being normal.
TL;DR: Tried to act mysterious and hot and cold to impress a coworker she reported me I blamed her, now I am unemployed
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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Own_While9265 on 2026-02-16 07:10:32+00:00.
Hello Reddit, I've never really posted on here, but this is something I genuinely need help with understanding.
I, 18 y/o female, work with "Stella", a 19 y/o female, at a well-known pizza restaurant. We are pretty close and have been hanging out outside of work for almost a year, and we make vulgar jokes often. That last part is very important to the story.
While we were making pizzas, Stella was taking pizzas out of the oven to cut them, and asked me to retrieve more sauce cups for her. I proceeded to grab as many as I could and placed them in my apron, creating a small pocket near my stomach. I proceeded to go up to her with a funny bit in mind and grab her hand while pretending to "give birth" and let the sauce cups spill out from my apron. I didn't make odd sounds, other than brief "grunting", but other than that, it was nothing special. I laughed awkwardly as she kind of looked at me as if I had grown genitals on my forehead. She dropped her hand from mine and ignored me for the remainder of the shift.
I was obviously taken aback, because we make jokes like this with each other all the time, and have always been very "tmi means tell me everything," so i dont think I grossed her out? I don't know Redditt. I attempted to reach out to her, but she dismissed my calls and texts, so I'm only assuming she needs space. Other than that, is there something I'm missing here?
TL;DR summary: coworker got upset about me making a labor joke, although we joke often, she is now ignoring me.
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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Rachymoo on 2026-02-16 04:12:24+00:00.
This literally happened less than an hour ago. I just finished cleaning everything up and felt like I needed to post this.
My boyfriend (35m) and I (33f) went to Texas Roadhouse for dinner. We took his new car that he bought last week. My salad tasted a little weird but I didn’t think much of it.. we don’t eat at Texas Roadhouse often so I thought that was just how it tastes. After we ate and got into the car, my stomach started really hurting. I told my boyfriend I needed to go to the bathroom and he started heading home. A few minutes into the 15 minute drive home, I started to feel VERY sick. Not poopy sick, but vomit sick. I thought it would pass and I’d be okay but the feeling intensified and by the time I spoke up, it was too late. I threw up all over myself, and I tried to hold it in my hands to avoid getting it on his new car.
The puke splashed up my face, got into my eyes so bad that I couldn’t open them/see out of them. It was all over my hair, my whole face, my arms, body, legs, EVERYWHERE. I was holding to-go boxes, they also were covered. My phone, my purse, EVERYTHING. My boyfriend surprisingly stayed calm, got me home, and cleaned the car while I cleaned myself. BUT NOT UNTIL I THREW UP IN THE SHOWER! So the drain was clogged, I was scooping vomit out of the shower into the toilet with my hands and just gagging. It was literally one of the most disgusting puke moments of my life.
TLDR- today I got food poisoning very quickly after eating and threw up into my own eyes and all over my boyfriend’s new car.
EDIT 1- it may not have been food poisoning. Idk what it was but I was fine all day and this was INSTANT. I got it all out and now I feel okay… not sure what else it could be other than the food I ate.
EDIT 2- Texas Roadhouse in Parker, CO.
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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Lemonfish99 on 2026-02-16 04:06:13+00:00.
So, I'm not gonna go over my last post here, but I have an update to the situation. I got J an early Valentine's Day gift on Wednesday, and it didn't go very well. I got her a box of chocolates and a card that asked her out but said I didn't want to make anything weird. And she didn't even talk to me about it. I tried speaking to her on Thursday but she said we'd talk later. I feel both extremely embarrassed and a massive dip in my self confidence. And to think I really liked her...
I don't know what to do anymore. I don't want this to ruin our friendship. Nor do I wish to make anything awkward at all. I know she probably feels just as awkward and embarrassed about it, but I have no idea anymore. This whole thing has just sort of made me give up on seeking a girlfriend. I have come to the realization that I don't need to be the one to pursue. That I don't have to be the one to ask the other out. But this whole thing had made me completely demoralized and the only thing that's made me feel better is MCR songs. What hurt the most though is that she couldn't even give me a yes or no. She couldn't even talk to me, as if we both aren't adults. I'd like advice because I'm definitely at a crossroads here.
TL;DR: I gave my crush a Valentine's Day Gift and asked her out, and she didn't even talk to me. Now I feel demoralized, empty, and sorry for my pathetic self.
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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Whisper_Melody on 2026-02-15 22:37:26+00:00.
Valentine’s was yesterday, and in the spirit of it, I (a girl) decided to gift my new friend a bouquet of red roses because she once mentioned she’d never received flowers before. I thought it would be a sweet, wholesome gesture.
She absolutely loved them. Smiling, hugging me, taking pictures, smelling them every five seconds. I was feeling like Best Friend of the Year.
About 20 minutes later… she starts sneezing. Then her eyes water. Then her nose gets stuffy. Turns out she’s mildly allergic to roses.
So yeah. Instead of just giving her first flowers, I also accidentally gave her the discovery of a new allergy. She refused to throw them away because “they’re my first flowers,” so they’re still sitting by her window like dramatic forbidden romance.
She’s fine now. Just mildly allergic.
TL;DR: Gave my friend her first-ever red roses for Valentine’s yesterday. Accidentally conducted an allergy test.
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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Educational-Phase102 on 2026-02-15 21:23:03+00:00.
This happened a little while ago, but it hasn't left my mind.
I (18 F) have always been a science nerd, so I'm pretty close with my high school science teachers since I've had some of them more than once (honors courses to AP). When I was a junior, I took AP Physics 1, and I had a fun, amazing teacher (calling him Mr. Smith). He had a coffee machine in the back of his classroom that he let us use whenever we wanted, and it had a pair of googly eyes on it, so it kind of resembled a silly face.
He told us a story about why it had googly eyes: He once pranked his wife by putting googly eyes on everything in their kitchen. Super fun and silly, obviously harmless. I thought it was a cute way to prank someone.
Now it's my senior year, and I'm taking AP Physics C with my old teacher, and he mentions the story again, and I was inspired to prank my favorite teacher (Mrs. Miller), who was the chemistry teacher.
I had this teacher every year for the three years I was at my high school (I moved there before my sophomore year), and she made me fall in love with chemistry. I enjoyed the content, and I always did phenomenal in the chemistry courses. During my final semester, instead of a traditional 3rd block, I did a "work-study" with her, but in reality, I just had a free period and I would sit in her class for two hours until I had to go to Mr. Smith's class for my final block.
I came up with a plan to prank her my putting googly eyes on random things in her classroom, and I recruited three of my friends and Mr. Smith to help me pull it off. He came and told us when she stepped out of her classroom, and said she wouldn't be back for 10-15 minutes. During this time, we starting googly-eyeing everything we could. Eventually, Mr. Smith came back and said she would be back any minute, so two of my friends left. The only people left in the classroom were me and my friend, Austin, because we wanted to see her reaction to our prank.
This is where it gets bad fast...
I decided to set up my phone to record her reaction because I thought it would be funny. Austin and I crouched behind a lab bench to surprise her after she saw everything. Eventually, she comes back in with another teacher, and they're gossiping about another teacher. I knew the rumor they were discussing because it went around the entire student body. The "rumor" was about how another teacher was having an inappropriate relationship with a student, and there were certain pictures involved.
By the time we realized what was happening, it was too late to jump up and tell them we were hiding in there. We had to sit behind the bench for around 10 minutes while they discussed the whole thing. Mind you, my phone is STILL recording. I'm panicking and covering my ears because I felt so guilty eavesdropping on their conversation and literally recording the entire thing.
I knew Mrs. Miller had an appointment, so she would be leaving before our last block and decided to sit and wait it out. Eventually, she left (didn't even see our prank) and Austin bolted out the back door because he had to get back to his actual class. She saw him in the hallway, and got suspicious as to why he was there. She figured out he was in the room, and went to Mr. Smith and our biology teacher, Mrs. Wood crying because she felt terrible for gossiping and was embarrassed he heard the conversation. At this point, she did not know I was also in the room.
After she actually left, I ran to Mr. Smith and told him everything. I told him we got stuck and recorded the entire conversation. Obviously, I deleted the video because I absolutely did not want anyone's career to be jeopardized because of a stupid prank. Him and Mrs. Wood said they would talk to her and explain everything since they knew I had no bad intentions.
I ended up skipping school the following day because I was too afraid to face Mrs. Miller. She was my favorite teacher, and I hated the idea that she wouldn't like me anymore because I fucked up SO bad. When I went back, the first thing I did was go to Mrs. Wood and ask her to come with me to the chemistry classroom to talk to Mrs. Miller. She gave me a hug and walked me down, and when I saw Mrs. Miller, I burst into tears and started apologizing profusely. She felt so bad that I was so upset over it, and said she saw our prank the next morning, and it did make her laugh. She mainly felt bad because she thought she was setting a bad example for us by gossiping (like girl be real LOL as if we all don't), and she was not mad at me at all.
Everything was fine afterwards, and we all completely forgot about the situation. I probably won't be pranking anyone else for a long time.
TL;DR: I pranked my favorite teacher and wanted to record her reaction but ended up recording a gossip session that contained confidential information. We got everything sorted out and all is well.
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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Desperate-Donkey on 2026-02-15 17:08:27+00:00.
I'm new at a job and sat somewhere on the first day to sit with my new team where they put me on a flex space. Then I sat there the next 7 days, I scooted 1 place because of HR and then another place. I was just doing my work but also sat opposite the director of the company. I didn't say anything to him besides good morning and good evening and put on music with earphones to not listen in to anything. Then there was a standard meeting with HR for new personell. She was being really cold to me and nice to the other person. She then told me that I drove her from her place and asked me what I was doing. I had no idea this was going on. I was also a bit informal with my new manager (dumb joke) so he was also a bit cold. I really hate this situation. I am going to sit somewhere else and act professional and if nothing happened. In 5 workdays I have my first month evaluation so I hope with my corrections I can repare the damage. Just say "better not sit there please" but they told me several times you can sit anywhere except on the directors spot.
TL;DR Without thinking sat on flex places where normally HR and management sat and got the cold shoulder.
Update: Everybody thanks for the kind words and advice. I was already thinking about quitting this weekend because this was my worst start ever. I also haven't worked in a while because of a burnout and this job means a lot to me to get back on track.
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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Mathio_Albero on 2026-02-15 16:22:04+00:00.
This happened yesterday and my ego is still in shambles.
For context, me(23M) and my gf(23F) met at Dallas but both are not from here.
After being perfect boyfriend for nearly a year the time to meet her family has come and i flew into Albuquerque where she grew up. She told me many times that it'd be a big deal, i just never understood how bif of a deal it really was.
Her dad is one of those old school types who you often see in movies. Firm handshake. Eye contact that feels like a job interview.
We land, he picks us up in this old dusty Ford truck(of course manual)
On the drive back he starts talking about how kids these days cannot drive real cars. I laugh and say yeah thats wild. He looks at me and goes you can drive stick, right?
Now here is the thing. Ive watched YouTube videos. I understand the concept. Clutch, shift, gas. Easy. In theory. So I say yeah, I got it, and i couldnt be more wrong.
Halfway home he pulls over and says tha its my turn. I get in the driver seat already sweating through my shirt. I stall it immediately.
He nods slowly. Says ease off the clutch slower. I try again. Stall. Third time I get it moving but I rev the engine like Im trying to wake up the whole Albuquerque. The truck lurches forward and i almost take out smbd mailbox.
My girlfriend is in the passenger seat trying not to laugh. I can see her shoulders shaking.
Then comes the hill. A small one. But to me it might as well have been Everest. I panic and forget everything. The truck rolls back a little and he has to yank the handbrake. He calmly says maybe let me handle it.
We switch seats. He drives the rest of the way in silence.
At dinner he tells the whole family about man with no practical skills. I keep smiling like it was funny but inside I wanted to evaporate.
This morning he asked if I want a lesson tomorrow. I said yes because apparently I enjoy suffering and i still want to date his daughter.
TL;DR: I lied about knowing how to drive on manual to impress my girlfriend’s dad and instead confirmed every stereotype he has about me.
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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Malko_Fishirs on 2026-02-15 14:29:52+00:00.
So this actually happened today, and I’m still mentally replaying it while cringing.
I was walking into a small grocery store near my place. It wasn’t crowded, just a few people scattered around. As I grabbed a basket, I noticed a guy near the entrance smiling and waving directly at me. Like, full eye contact, hand up, friendly wave. Naturally, I smiled back and gave him an enthusiastic wave too. Not just a subtle one. A confident, “oh hey, I know you!” type of wave.
He immediately looked confused.
That’s when I heard, from behind me, “Hey!!” in a much more familiar tone. I slowly turned around and saw a woman rushing toward him, clearly the intended recipient of the wave. I was standing directly in her line of sight, perfectly blocking her from him. He had been waving at her the entire time.
The worst part? We were all now standing within two feet of each other. There was no pretending it didn’t happen. I awkwardly lowered my hand and mumbled something that sounded like “sorry” but probably came out as a dying breath. The woman looked at me like I had just tried to steal her friend mid-greeting.
I then had to shop in the same tiny store for the next 10 minutes, periodically making accidental eye contact with both of them in different aisles.
I’m considering changing grocery stores.
TL;DR: Thought a stranger was waving at me, waved back enthusiastically, realized he was greeting someone behind me, had to continue shopping in shame.
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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/MaryM_Guidry on 2026-02-15 09:51:38+00:00.
so this started in a laundromat in El Paso, Texas because apparently I cannot just shut up and exist like a normal person.
This girl walks in like absolute 10, starts arguing on the phone in rapid spanish. I catch like three words total but I recognize the vibe. Family drama. She hangs up looks stressed. I, being an idiot with hero syndrome, say something like sounds intense.
She switches to eng, laughs, says yeah my mom is dramatic. Then she asks, wait do you speak Spanish?
And for some reason my brain goes yes.
I do not.
I took two semesters in high school. I can order tacos and ask where the bathroom is. That is it.
She lights up. Says finally, someone who gets it. We start talking. I keep it vague. nodding. Throwing in random words like claro and si entiendo. She seems impressed that I can keep up.
We exchange numbers.
Fast forward two weeks. We have been texting. I use chatgpt like it is life support. I copy paste voice notes into apps to figure out what she is saying. It is exhausting but she is amazing so I keep the lie alive
Last night she tells me her parents want to meet me on tuesday for dinner. Full family. Mostly Spanish speakers. She says it will be so nice to not have to translate for once.
My stomach dropped straight to hell.
I tried to gently say I am a little rusty. She laughs and says do not worry you are doing great.
I am not doing great. I am committing cultural fraud
I spent last night trying to speed run spanish on yt like I have an exam tomorrow. My search history is how to survive dinner in spanish and common phrases to impress mexican parents
I could come clean I know that but now it feels worse because I doubled down for two weeks. she keeps telling her cousins how cool it is that I speak spanish.
Tuesday is in 48 hours
TL;DR: told a girl I speak fluent spanish to impress her, have been secretly using translation apps and AI for two weeks now I am invited to a family dinner where nobody speaks eng and I am absolutely cooked
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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/CatDaddyAnonymous on 2026-02-15 00:25:23+00:00.
I had a coworker that I'll call Cody for this post.
Cody and I worked together for a little over a year in an office setting and had lots of downtime to be able to talk. We would chat about everyday things, but majority of the time the topic of women and dating came up and he started to ask me for advice surrounding this subject. He would ask for tips regarding his confidence, how to better talk to women, and get around the inability to get a second date etc.
I would give him the normal advice like, approach situations with confidence, treat women like they are people and not just someone you're trying to get off with, and start working on yourself.
He started going to therapy, eating better, and hitting the gym over that year we worked together and began having better dates with the women he matched with on dating apps. I started to notice red flags when he decided to take a trip across the country and visit, "the one that got away." I asked him about how the trip went when he got back and he said that she had blocked him after he waited outside of her work, having tracked her on Snapchat maps. He didn't take the hint the first time she rejected him at his workplace and then decided to show up at her house. When he got to her house, a shirtless man answered the door and told him to fuck off.
After telling me all this I told him he needed to let this go before he started falling into harassment and stalking charges. I let him know that this wasn't a healthy way of going about finding someone and as far as I know he dropped it after a few more months of switching phones trying to text her and more pressure from me and other coworkers to drop it.
He started telling me that he was matching with more women on dating apps in a town an hour away from where we lived and would drive over there in the evenings after work and come back to town in the morning to get ready for work. He was doing this a few times a week and seemed pretty happy. I really didn't think anything about it and congratulated him on the newfound confidence and dates.
That was until he left our section of our workplace and started working in another area within the same company. We all get called into a meeting one morning being told that Cody was no longer allowed to access our section and if we saw anything suspicious to let a higher-up know right away. When we asked our management what was going on, they wouldn't elaborate further and left it at that. So another coworker and I got curious and decided to just look up Cody's name online. We ended up finding an article about a police sting involving Cody and multiple other individuals. Law enforcement had posed as underage girls as young as 14 years old to lure in predators. Cody had sent lewd pictures in this sting and drove up to the town to meet with who he assumed was a minor. The very same town he told me was constantly going to after matching with all these women on dating apps.
Cody was eventually removed from our workplace and arrested on charges surrounding the sting. He is currently in prison for 2 years, but may be awaiting another court date due to a hit and run that happened while he was awaiting the previous trial for the sex offender charges.
I know that I shouldn't necessarily blame myself because he was the predator and decided to do what he did, but I can't help but think that all that time spent giving him advice, I was basically giving him the confidence to meet with minors. Not to mention all the times he was going out of town prior to the sting operation. Was he actually meeting with underage girls that whole time? It just makes me sick to my stomach most days and I don't always cope with it very well.
TL;DR: Worked with a guy for a little over a year and gave him dating advice. He was later removed from our section and arrested for attempts to meet with a minor, leaving me to believe I gave him the confidence to go through with being a predator.
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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/XcracktivitiesX on 2026-02-14 21:30:17+00:00.
So , since early December , my grandma has been a resident at the local nursing and rehab home. Honestly , it's less of a medical center and more of a departure lounge for the ' Great Beyond ' and the gossip there is top tier. Thankfully for us , the place is located quite literally right across the street from my house. My commute there is approximately fourty-five seconds if im walking. Because of the geographic convenience , ive been visiting her every day for the last two months. Ive become such a fixture in that building that im basically the facility's emotional support human , minus the uniform and credentials and I have significantly more existential dread than the rest of the employees.
In that time ive managed to socialize my way into the good graces of the entire ecosystem. Im tight with the doctors , the nurses , aides and a rotating cast of residents who are all charmingly one foot in the grave already.
Now you think a nursing home would be a place of peace and tranquility. Instead though , this place is run like a maximum security prison for people who remember when bread was a nickel. The staff are all a bunch of fun suckers. They're a collection of self important power trippers who seem to have been recruited directly from a " How To Be A Buzzkill " seminar. Their favorite pastime is enforcing bogus ass rules with the kind of smug intensity usually reserved for TSA agents finding a 3.1 ounce bottle of shampoo.
Let's face it , most of the residents they house have lungs that are 80% tar and 20% stubbornness at this point. They're allowed to have cigarettes but are forced to surrender their packs and lighters to the front security desk. The guards distribute them only when they feel like it and usually with a side of bitchy attitude. It's infantilizing. These people are grown ass adults. Most have survived world wars and recessions yet they cant be trusted with a damn Bic ?
Because im there everyday , most of my resident friends trust me. Most of these poor souls spend 23 hours a day staring at a fuzzy TV screen and waiting on a tray of ice cold beige mush. More than half of them havent seen or had a visitor from a family member or friend in years. If a cigarette is the only thing that makes them feel alive while they wait out their end of days then who am I to deny them that happiness ? So , ive been running an underground ' Nicotine Railroad ' sneaking packs into rooms and hiding them.
Word of my courier services spread thru the ward faster than a rumor about a prune juice shortage. A few days ago , my other resident friends , we'll call them Mr. W and Mr. G , cornered me. At first it was the usual request , a pack of cigs and a vape. They paid me my standard hustle fee , just a couple bucks because honestly their SSI checks are mostly made of lint and optimism and im not a monster. I made the run to the gas station , delivered back and thought we were square until they instantly propositioned me again with another errand.
Between the two of them they slapped $40 in my hand as payment and asked me to run to the liquor store. In nursing home currency that's basically a small fortune. Now look , im an entrepreneur and im a sucker for easy money so I , of course , happily obliged. For the last three days in a row now though ive been smuggling in booze to these two men and you wanna know what the real kicker of this whole situation is though ?
I just found out that Mr. W and Mr. G arent just thirsty and tryna have fun ; they're both recovering alcoholics and ive made them relapse.
I feel like a massive piece of shit but on the other hand . . . fourty bucks is fourty bucks.
TL;DR: Started out smuggling cigarettes into a nursing home for the elderly out of the kindness of my heart. Ended up as a cut-rate cartel mule for two recovering alcoholic grandpas who are paying me handsomely to help them see double before they see God.
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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Geraldine-Doyle on 2026-02-15 02:21:22+00:00.
it was 2 am and here i am sitting in my undies on the balcony cuz for some reason, apparently, i am now unable to sleep till it hits 4 am. idk whether its my phone, doomscrolling or whatever, but i just cant get rid of this insomnia for some reason, whatev.
so, hre i am, doomscrolling on my phone, watching those ai slop videos of diddy and trump having a baby ot smthing, when i hear this nasty ass crying sound. it was like a baby, but much much worse. i look down and see this fluffy orange cat stuck on the ledge between floors, doing that fucking yowl
im not even a cat person. not even an animals person tbf. im just a guilt ridden idiot.i knock on the neighbor’s door below me, no answer. i knock on the one above, no answer. i call out like pspspsps like a stupid clown, cat just screams louder.
my brain goes full hero mode. i decide im gonna grab him before he falls. my balcony has this janky divider and i can kinda climb over to the next one if im careful enough. i throw on sweatpants, no shirt, grab my phone flashlight, and i start doing this shitty parkour between balconies.
i manage to reach the cat, and hes terrified but lets me scoop him. im like yes, saved, im basically a disney prince, whatev. then the cat freaks out and pisses on my chest. not a little. like lets out a full bladder of warm stinky gratitude. i nearly drop him. i grab him tighter, he scratches my arm, blood starts dripping, im slipping on cat pee, and my phone flashlight falls and clatters two floors down.
i panic and just go with the closest open door, which is the neighbors balcony door. its unlocked. i step inside holding this cat like a hostage, shirtless, bleeding, reeking of piss, and im yelling hello, i found your cat, please dont call the cops.
and then the neighbor wakes up and screams because from her angle it looks like a half naked guy broke in and stole her cat. she starts blasting me with a broom. i try to explain but i sound like a drunk crackhead. the cat leaps out of my arms, runs through her living room, knocks over a lamp, and disappears under her couch.
now her husband is up, hes yelling, another neighbor comes out, someone starts filming, and im standing there in the doorway with scratches and pee and blood, trying to be like no i swear i’m not robbing you, i’m just stupid.
they didnt actually believe me till the actual cat owner from two floors up runs down crying, recognizes the cat nder the couch and thanks me dearly. great, except now im the guy who breaks into apartments soaked in cat piss
TL;DR: heard a cat crying on a ledge, tried to rescue it by climbing balconies, got pissed on and scratched, stumbled into an unlocked neighbor’s apartment holding the cat, got attacked with a broom
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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Springtronic315 on 2026-02-15 00:17:33+00:00.
(This happened yesterday but I figured i’d share anyways.)
I got my wisdom teeth out yesterday, all four (two top, two bottom) with the two on the bottoms being entirely impacted (sideways.) Recovery has gone great so far and i’m already back to eating soft foods like eggs, ice cream and smoothies. I have my follow up appointment on monday.
While I was still coming down from anesthesia my mom was driving me home and I decided to email my teachers. I rember the email being far more coherent than what it actually was, as when I read it back this morning I am mortified by what I wrote. Not only did I send this email to my Humanties, Photography, German and Criminal Justice teacher, I sent this to the school resource officer as well.
The email reads as follows:
the suregtey went well and i'm done!!!! i'll see you back in class on wednesdha I love you guys I just wanted to say youre awesome teachers im i'm sorry that im gonna leave you when I graduate but you guyst are awesome and I love you guys and im sorey im annoying at timesthats my fault I apologize. you guys are awesome and I love you guys as my teacherss
im sending this message to officer blanchard too hi offocer blacjard youre very cool and youre funny and remind me of another older brother I get to have. but at schol youre awesome andkn toy for being cool im drugged as hell rn see you later bro aphid versus brocwphus a
I cannot imagine the talks im going to get from my teachers when I return to school Wendesay, and i’m positive I will NEVER hear the end of this.
TL;DR I sent an email to my teachers and school resource officer still high on anesthetic telling them I loved them, was going to miss them after graduation and was “drugged as hell rn”
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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Item_Store on 2026-02-14 23:35:20+00:00.
My family and I are on the last day of a cruise to the ABC islands in the very southern Caribbean. We had a stop in Aruba on Wednesday, during which we spent a lot of time at the beach.
I was expecting to get sunburnt, which is not abnormal for me, and I applied a borderline-ridiculous amount of SPF 50 before enjoying the water. By the end of the day, I was unsurprisingly burnt, but it seemed manageable. No blisters or anything, just red and tender back/shoulders.
The next 2 days were fine. Some discomfort, but totally livable. Towards the end of day 2, it was time to shower, so I did so and hopped out to dry off. This was mistake #1.
Suddenly, all over my back/shoulders/arms, I felt the most intense itching and pain I've ever experienced. Like someone had white-hot push pins and was playing whack-a-mole with my hair follicles at the speed of a jackhammer. I crumpled to the ground, writhing in agony and unable to speak, at which point my wife suggested putting on aloe vera. We did so, which was mistake #2.
Now, the itching doubles or triples or quadruples- I can't really tell because I couldn't think straight let alone communicate what I was feeling. In addition, my back also felt like someone poured acid on it. Complete agony.
This persists for probably 6 hours, during which I did a combination of grunt, scream, pace, take scalding hot showers to overwhelm my nerves, and consider jumping overboard to end it all. I've had multiple kidney stones and would take all of them again, simultaneously, over this experience.
I'm now at a stage where I still have frequent pins and needles, but I can talk and sit relatively still. After researching what happened to me, I learned of "Hell's Itch", which is a rare neurological reaction some people have to excessive UV light exposure. Guess what the most common trigger is? A shower ~48 hours after the exposure. Guess what the worst thing you can do to relieve it is? Apply aloe vera to the burn site.
Tomorrow I have about 16 hours of travel to do, and all I can do is pray that it doesn't flare up. I'm doped up on everything you're supposed to be to treat it (except for a supplement called beta-alanine, which I do not have access to) and perpetually terrified of being in the sun ever again. This incident has absolutely left a mark on my psyche.
TL;DR: I got sunburnt, took a shower, experienced the worst pain I've ever experienced (Hell's Itch), and will never go in the sun ever again.
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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/DudeWheresMyCuteCar on 2026-02-14 16:45:14+00:00.
My ex gf invited me to her wedding. It was unexpected, but I accepted. The invitation said the people who were allowed to bring a plus one were married or engaged couples. I was not engaged or married, so I went alone. I managed to couple up with another single guy at the wedding and stayed with him throughout the ceremony to avoid looking like I didn't belong. The two of us got separated at the reception because we were allocated to different tables. My table only had single people. As we got to know one another, we realised we had one specific thing in common. We were all exes of the bride. It was a little weird, but we made a joke of it because we assumed that was the point of us being there.
Fast forward to the speeches. When it was the bride's turn to speak, she asked all of her exes to stand up, which we did. She informed the audience that we were the people she dated and disappointed over the years before she discovered the love of her life, aka her husband. She wanted us to know how grateful she was to have been with all of us, but then she locked eyes with me and said maybe not ALL of us. She said my name and asked me to wave at everyone. I waved like an idiot. She warned all the women at the wedding to watch out for me because I literally peed on her. The husband stood up at that moment and covered the microphone with his hand while he whispered something to his wife that made her look confused as fuck.
The bride sat down without saying anything else. The husband made an awkward joke about his wife having too much champagne and instructed us to please take our seats. The DJ intervened and asked if any of the groom's exes were also in the house, which actually made the audience laugh. The music played and everyone pretended none of that just happened.
Except for me. I got the fuck out of there as soon as the lights dimmed for the disco ball.
Tl:dr Accepted an invite from my ex to attend her wedding and ended up being named and shamed at the reception.
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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/endeekiller37 on 2026-02-14 13:13:24+00:00.
Apparently red meat is hard to digest... I'm learning the hard way.
Ok, this started technically yesterday, I started my cycle and remembered I hadn't put any iron supplements on my grocery list, so instead of adding it on like a normal person I decided I'd replace yesterdays supplement with a 2.3lbs ribeye steak. I didn't even read the damn thing, just saw the 18 dollar steak and added it to my cart. I didn't realize how big it was until the delivery guy handed it off to me. I was a nervous, nobody expects to see a fat ass slab of meat but I was determined to cure my anemia for the next month with this large steak. I cook it (it was my first time tackling such a daunting task) and it turned out good with some mashed potatoes on the side. Solid dinner, right?
So fast forward, I took a little vitamin c gummy because my grandma said it helped with better iron absorption (this is probably unrelated but just in case that's actually the cause I'm adding it) and I'd need while I'm on my cycle. Everything was going great until about 2:30 in the morning. Because that's when I started feeling bloated and my stomach cramped. I thought it would pass but it's currently 7:05 and I'm pretty much on payroll with the damn toilet. I went to Google (probably not my best option but it seemed too embarrassing to go ask my family about it. And apparently I overwhelmed my digestive tract with all the meat I ate, not to mention the protein and iron (Wich I thought was good to have in abundance but my stomach loudly disagrees.also, I learned what "protein farts" are and they are NOT plesant at all. Neither are meat sweats😭😭
So I guess I'm writing this because I hope someone at least gets a laugh out of this. I'm hoping I'll be doing the same in the next few hours
TL;DR: ate two pounds of steak in one sitting, single handedly fucked my digestive system and is currently glued to the toilet regretting every life choice that led up to this... Just buy the damn supplement and not a steak bigger than your head, your stomach will thank you... Lmao
Today I Fucked Up
r/TIFU means Today I Fucked Up.