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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/MasquedCurio on 2026-08-09 06:42:38+00:00.

Disclaimer: may contain Jujutsu Kaisen spoilers

Previous context:

Earlier this year, I got my mom into JJK in honor of season three coming out. Like most viewers, she ended up really liking Gojo. Perhaps a bit too much. It got to the point i started sending her every. single. fanart of gojo i saw online because she loves him so much. (my algorithm is destroyed)

Now, this doesn’t sound too bad.

Except, like many anime-only JJK fans, she got horrifically spoiled courtesy of my bf having us all gather round to watch the iconic “judas” fan animation of gojo vs sukuna.

I fear following the spoiler of The Honored One’s inevitable demise she lost one of very few streams of dopamine in her life (we’ve been having a tough time in the family for a solid year honestly)

In my eternal genius (read: idiocy), i attempted to reassure my mother that gojo is still here for her. Alas, simple reassurance was not enough to bring back the gojo dopamine train.

Here is where I truly fucked up.

I enjoy reading and writing fanfic. Anyone familiar with fanfic knows of AO3, and the great thing about AO3 is their tagging system (shoutout ao3, best filtering/tagging system on the internet, keep up the good work)

If I had been smarter or more patient, I would have sifted through the countless gojo-centric fics and handpicked a handful of wholesome, fluffy, or fix-it fics for my mother to enjoy with her favorite fictional sensei.

Alas, my folly is a tale most AO3 users fall into eventually: the complacency of ignoring tags.

And so, rather than meticulously sifting through countless fics and pre-reading them to ensure their appropriateness for my mother, I instead blindly trusted my previous self at 2am, choosing to send the first gojo fic I saw from one of the authors I follow on AO3.

Link sent, fic shared, end of story…

Until i saw that mom had reacted to the text with the link. I went back and checked out the fic.

Dear reader, when I tell you I had assumed the “satoru gojo drabbles” would be a silly, fluffy, wholesome compilation of scenes with the one and only satoru gojo, a perfectly suitable fic for my mother, I truly mean it.

What I found instead was a 117,000 word compilation of nothing. but. smut.

In a panic, i texted mom, begging her not to open the link, hoping she had just reacted to the text to show she got it, advising her not to open it, swearing i truly did not know at the time of sending it that it was a novels worth of smut.

Verbatim, our texts upon this realization are as follows

Me: DID NOT REALIZE THE GOJO FIC COMPILATION I SENT IS ALL NSFW MY BAD

Me: I have not read it I just saw the title and was like “oh mom likes gojo” fml

Me: Monumental miscalculation on my part

Mom: What is NSFW?

Me: Stands for not safe for work. In this case, apparently that fic is 117k words of smut (skull emoji) I did NOT know that when I sent it. I did NOT read the tags.

Mom: It’s ok!!! I can handle it! (three laughing emojis)

Alas, my begging her not to read it, to disregard my epic folly, have fallen on the deaf ears of a deeply gojo-obsessed, romance-starved middle aged woman.

TL;DR: My mom got sad over the fate of Gojo again so I tried to brighten her spirit with some wholesome, silly, fluffy gojo fanfic, but i forgot to read the tags and ended up sending her over 100k words of gojo smutfic

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/supercman99 on 2026-08-08 21:25:39+00:00.

I (45m) took my boys to the State Fair. In the carnival rides we found one called the Tornado… which is a variation of those rides where you hold the center wheel and spin yourself as the ride goes (one of my favorite rides to do since I can’t really do the crazy rides anymore). The wheel was a little textured but it seemed good to grab and spin. So we spun real fast from the start (mainly me)… I dragged it to stop, then the other way. Then stopped and back the first direction. Got off the ride and my one hand was a little sore. Giant 1” plus blister, wrinkled skin on my palm. Similar on the other hand but that one was ripped open. Smaller blisters on both thumbs, 2 more fingers… 6 in all. Took a bee line straight to the first aid center for bandages.

TLDR. Tried to spin like mad on a carnival ride and earned blisters all over my hands and fingers

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/gaialien on 2026-08-08 10:29:12+00:00.

After a long week of work and being premenstrual, I decided to make easy comfort dinner of the spicy buldak noodle variety. At the time it was a satisfyingly delicious, tingly experience.

This morning, not so much. The cat woke me up at 6am with her usual underhand tactics (batting hair clips across the room, rummaging in my jewellery box, paw in mouth) - despite having some expected cramping, I was for a moment in blissful ignorance, forgetting I'd had such a fiery feast the night before.

Standing up, however, I'm immediately hit with what I've heard variously referred to as 'shooty bum pain', 'butt lightning', and the more scientific 'javelin arse'. Like many women this isn't an unusual experience for me at this monthly juncture, but this time it's accompanied by an unexpected urgent gurgling.

The cat meows impatiently with eyes full of "Wtf, mother?" because I'm just standing there calculating my next move, rather than making haste with her ladyship's breakfast. I manage to whimper out an apology and divert to the bathroom.

Ah, yes. The ramen.

I don't need to go into details, but period-having people may be familiar with what it does to the pipes on a normal, non-spicy day - so you can fill in the rest.

When it seems like it's over I splash my clammy face with water and finally get to making my princess's most important meal of the day. By this point she'd been howling outside the door (I usually let her in to writhe at my feet, but didn't think she'd enjoy it as much this time), and is monitoring my every move with a steely gaze to ensure I don't stray further out of her usual strict schedule.

I barely get the tin of tasty ocean fish in broth open when it happens again. I can feel the rage in her eyes burning the back of my head as I sprint back up the stairs. Please say this is the last instalment.

When the breakfast-making finally resumes, rather than being her yappy self she's now sitting in disappointed silence. If cats could huffily fold their arms, she would have. She seems to forgive me though when she gets to tuck in at last to her fishy feast with small brown rocks on the side, and I wearily return to my bedchamber.

A very sweet part of our weekend routine is that she comes up and snuggles in with me after her breakfast, and here she is to settle down for a nice long lie-in with mother. This is usually our favourite part of the day, when father (my boyfriend) is still asleep and we snooze away in each other's arms. I've been looking forward to this all week, and like to think she has too.

Through the quiet bliss, my boyfriend rips a clean fart and I find myself feeling jealous that he can let one off so confidently. Out of sheer reflex my body goes to reply with one of my own, but it (thankfully) comes to an emergency stop at the gates. That is NOT happening. I try to breathe through it. The cat, after her morning of routine pandemonium, has finally got comfortable and is purring contentedly. Only an evil person would disturb her.

Unfortunately, Satan is real and is inside me.

By this third time there is so much burning that I decide to just get in the shower, to avoid aggravating the situation further. Even Andrex super soft triple-quilt feels like coarse-grit sandpaper and I wonder wistfully why we still haven't embraced the bidet in this country. I'm feeling a bit faint, and the cool water brings me back from the brink.

I'm now finally back in bed, slightly shellshocked, with a strong chamomile tea and a boyfriend who slept peacefully through the entire ordeal of toilet abuse, whimpering, flushing, showering and caterwauling. The consequences of my actions have humbled me and the cat is nowhere to be seen, presumably packing a tiny bag with all her toys to run away. How do I make it up to her?

TL;DR: Made buldak spicy ramen as period comfort food, resulting in devastatingly amplified and painful gut drama and destroying my cat's precious morning routine.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Aliensarerealbruh on 2026-08-08 04:52:40+00:00.

I went on a job interview and the interviewer said that she didnt have anyone with my experience come for an interview so she preferred me. She showed me around the workplace, didnt ask many questions, let me show her how i work and gave me a few days to call her after i had thought about it to confirm that i wanted this job. In my inexperienced mind i thought that it meant that she wanted me and that when i called to confirm that i did want this job that it meant we had a deal right?

WRONG!

Apparently we never said that we have a deal and she is considering one more candidate 💀 my dad told me to text her and let her know of my misunderstanding so that she can let me know quicker about their final decision. She then explained that candidates that have been chosen would go on a second phase of the interview that i had already gone through because i was on vacation when the interview happened and she didnt wanna ruin it by telling me to come back again. Apparently she explained this during the interview too.

Welp assuming makes an ass out of u and me

i have already quit my job and i have already told my colleagues that i will go to this other job and if they dont pick me i will go through the humiliation ritual of telling them that i wont go after all cause im a fucking idiot

im so embarassed its insane

TL;DR: the interviewer said nice things about me and i thought she hired me but there is a 50/50 chance that she wont and i will embarass myself

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Dizzy-Rentan on 2026-08-08 01:51:23+00:00.

A few years ago I came across a curious item in a friend’s bathroom. One of those little stools to prop yourself up in a squatting position. After clumsily propping myself up on it I gave it a minute and safe to say it felt like my whole life I’d been defecating half-assed. Since then I have yet to sit down to poop. If a toilet doesn’t have a bidet and stool I usually hold it or find a way to make do (wet wipes and a hammer squat on the toilet itself).

Fast forward to me pooping at my girlfriends for the first time. I notice that she is yet to be enlightened on the excretion essentials and her toilet is lacking the stool. No matter. I decide to squat on the toilet itself as I’ve grown accustomed to. I didn’t expect her to come in the bathroom since we were watching a show in another room but she needed to get something from the medicine cabinet.

We make eye contact and it feels like my heart is going to be the next thing plopping out my ass. “What’re you doing?!” I hastily explain that this is the way humans are meant to shit but the knowledge is lost in a sea of incorrigible laughter.

Can my relationship survive this?

TL;DR: got caught by my girlfriend using a regular toilet in the squat position

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/girlwithcowpup on 2026-08-07 15:57:48+00:00.

Obligatory this happened last week. For context, I (22f) live with my boyfriend (24m) and his family.

It starts off sad but gets funny I promise.

I was visiting my grandmother in the hospital last Tuesday. She’s since been moved to hospice care. Shes 97 and suffering from pneumonia. As you can imagine it was a rough visit. She’s always been a big part of my life. She watched my siblings and I whenever our Mom was working and we lived with her when my mom left my dad. She’s always encouraged me to take my education seriously (thanks to her I am about to graduate from law school at 23). She’s the only parent my mom ever had. I have to move on because I’m getting emotional just writing this but all this to say we’ve always been close and after seeing her last Tuesday I was absolutely devastated.

I stayed longer than expected just sitting with her and my dad drove me home around 10pm. My boyfriend’s sister (21) was throwing a surprise party for her friend. She’d told us all about it weeks earlier. She’d even reminded me the day before but after visiting my grandma this totally slipped my mind. My boyfriend sent me a reminder text saying people were already over.

When I got there I immediately looked for ny boyfriend to regroup and see what our plan was for the night but I couldn’t find my boyfriend in our room, the kitchen, living room, or even the backyard. As I’m looking for him, a chorus of drunk 19-21 year olds are begging me to do shots or play drinking games with them.

Ive been working 7 days a week and Wednesday would be my first day off in 26 days. Also I was in a really really shitty mood and seeing my boyfriend nowhere I thought ‘fuck it, I could use a drink.’ I grabbed a canned strawberry margarita that was much much too sweet and began mingling. Boyfriend’s sister and her best friend convince me to do a tequila shot. That was my mistake. I can have one drink, absolutely not a problem for me, but one tequila shot? That’s a different story.

After a few more canned strawberry margs and hours of drunkenly bonding with boyfriend’s sister and her bestie, the night is winding down. My boyfriend practically begged me to come to bed at 2am. I wasn’t having it. “I’m so responsible all the time I just want to be 22.” and “I have to start looking for hospice facilities for my grandma tomorrow, just let me have today.” There isn’t really arguing with that so he relented.

The next part of the night is a blur. I was feeling sick. Like I couldn’t go to sleep feeling this way so I went to the bathroom and made myself throw up. It was odd, my vomit looked pink. I brushed it off. Desperately trying to look as though I was not much much too drunk, I put on some under eye patches thinking this would save face in front of the other partygoers. ‘I wasn’t throwing up in there! I was doing my skincare routine at 3am. The noises are a total coincidence.’ I don’t think anyone bought that but nevertheless it made sense when I was drunk.

I tried to go to bed but still felt too sick. This time I went to the bathroom downstairs so I wouldn’t be heard retching by any partygoers. I start throwing up again and it is blood red. I am immediately panicked but still puking. Then the tell tale sign you’re throwing up blood, coffee grounds. I am now certain I’m vomiting blood. I run upstairs yelling for my asleep boyfriend and alarming everyone as the entire house is between our bedroom and the bathroom downstairs.

I burst in the door. “You have to take me to hospital right now! I’m throwing up blood.” He doesn’t respond. I shake him awake more aggressively than necessary and repeat this plea for urgent medical help. He shoots up straight in bed.

“Okay babe it’s gonna be okay, I’ll take care of you.”

He reassures me, still waking up.

I’m grabbing his car keys when he asks me, now more awake and aware of the state I’m in.

“Hey are you sure it’s not strawberry margaritas?”

Of course I’m sure it’s not margarita, you think I’m some drunk fool?? I am explaining fervently there were partially digested blood that looked like coffee grounds. This is serious!! I am flailing my arms dramatically. He starts to climb back into bed.

“Honey any chance that was a chocolate cupcake and not digested blood?”

I slowly put his keys back on the dresser.

“That is entirely possible, I suppose.” I say sheepishly. Before excusing myself to apologize to the other partygoers for the panic and get myself ready for bed.

The next morning was a nightmare as we had to leave for a family vacation and I was sad, hungover, and not yet packed.

Next time I’ll be sticking with seltzer water and lime.

Tl;dr shook my boyfriend awake at 3am screaming to him and a house party full of people I was throwing up blood but it was strawberry margaritas and a chocolate cupcake.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/mloDiablo on 2026-08-07 15:28:19+00:00.

This didn't happen today, but the realization still hits me with a wave of pure cringe whenever I think back on it.

Back in high school (the 90s), I knew a kid named David Barnes. Being a fan of comic books, my brain immediately connected his name to Bucky Barnes—Captain America’s sidekick/The Winter Soldier. So, naturally, I started calling him "Bucky."

I used it as a friendly nickname for years. Every time I saw him in the halls or in class, it was "Hey, Bucky!" or "What's up, Bucky?" He never pushed back, got visibly upset, or told me to stop, so I just assumed he was cool with it and got the reference.

Fast-forward to graduation day. We were hanging out, and for some reason, it occurred to me that I had been using this nickname for four straight years without ever confirming if he actually knew why I called him that.

I turned to him and asked, "Hey, you know why I've been calling you Bucky all this time, right?"

He looked at me with this deadpan, slightly defeated expression and said:

"Yeah, of course... because of my buck teeth."

My heart instantly sank into my stomach. It turns out he had no idea who Bucky Barnes was. For four entire years, this poor guy thought I was relentlessly mocking his physical appearance to his face every single day, and he had just accepted it as his reality.

TL;DR: Called a guy named David Barnes "Bucky" for four years in high school thinking I was making a cool Captain America reference, only to find out on graduation day he thought I was mocking his buck teeth the whole time.

Edit: To clear up a weird comment trend—I didn't call him "The Winter Soldier" back in school. I only added that name in the post as context for anyone here who might not recognize the name Bucky Barnes on its own.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/LankyGuitar6528 on 2026-08-07 13:43:04+00:00.

The vet said the omegas would be good for my elderly dog's joints. So I went to my local pet store. The stuff cost $25... but I had a return to balance it out - $25 of canned dog food our dog hated (and the pet store allows returns of unopened pet food). They have me on the computer and when I bought the dog food they promised the return would be simple if she didn't like it

But it wasn't simple. A new hire printed out reams of paper, swiped my card 5 times, charged me twice, refunded me 3 times and then had to charge me again... so by the time these transactions were finished I was holding 5 miles of cash register tape trying to figure out what was going on.

The next day... I couldn't find the fish oil. FML! Then I just KNEW what happened. That new hire had me all flustered and I left my fish oil at the store. I searched high and low - no fish oil. Clearly they owed me a bottle of fish oil. So back I go. This time - the new hire was in the back somewhere. The owner was on the till, there was a huge lineup... I tried to explain but she just waved me away and said I could have the bottle and out I go fish oil in hand.

Later in the day I'm driving along and a 2nd bottle of fish oil rolls out from under the seat of my car. FML! I had it the whole time? Damnit. I could keep it but that would be dishonest and this is a local store not some big chain... that's not right. I could return it to them and admit my stupidity. Then inspiration hit... why not just buy this 2nd bottle? Good for the store, makes me look good... I didn't really need two bottles of fish oil but wouldn't that be better than admitting I'm a moron? So back I go to the pet store.

This time I walked in and of course the new hire is working the till. I handed her my bottle of fish oil and said I would like to buy it. She said "but you brought this in with you?!" I yaddayadda'd over my story omitting the parts that made me look stupid.

Then another new hire comes out... sees new hire #1 in distress poking buttons on the till, asks what's happening. New hire #1 mutters to New HIre #2 that I took a bottle of fish oil without paying, returned and now want to pay for it. Together glare at me as I swipe my card and watch me all the way out the door muttering to each other. But wait... where was the cheering? Where was the "what a great guy?" Nothing?

Thinking over my story... I guess I basically told New Hire that I had shoplifted the bottle, had a crisis of conscience and returned to pay. Which... ok... well... yes... but also NO! I didn't shop lift it! Well.. ok yes I kinda did... but also NO!

Now I have $50 worth of fish oil and I can never go back to that store. *sigh*

TL;DR I took a bottle of fish oil from a pet store I wasn't entitled to, returned to pay and sort of made myself look like a criminal.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/roz-rain04 on 2026-08-07 04:17:47+00:00.

A few weeks ago, three of my friends and I(F21) went on vacation. We’re from the middle of nowhere Kansas, and we went to New York for a week. While on vacation we saw a really small production of the musical Oklahoma, and oh my God. The accents in the musical were so bad. It was Oklahoma, so they were supposed to be southern, but they were awful. After seeing the production, one of my friends and I kept talking to each other in southern accents, which turned into us talking in southern accents almost all the time. It was honestly addicting. I got stuck in the accent. I started thinking in the accent. I lost myself in the accent. I don’t think my accent was very good or convincing, but it was so much fun.

This is where the fuck up began. 

The friend I had been doing accents with and I went to a gay club, and while we were having a fun time on the dancefloor, a girl and her friend came up to us and made a dance circle with the four of us. We introduced ourselves and chatted a bit, but of course, I was stuck in The Accent, which caused my friend to also be stuck in The Accent. She asks where we’re from, and I tell her Kansas, and she says “I love your Kansas accents!”

For those who might not know, most people born and raised in Kansas don’t have southern accents. Nobody around my hometown has one unless they moved here from somewhere more southern. She’s from NYC and obviously didn’t know this, and instead of explaining that it’s not my real accent, I just say “oh, thanks!” and we keep talking. Eventually the four of us move to a table to keep talking, and we end up exchanging numbers. My friend and I end up leaving the club first, and then my friend informs my useless lesbian ass that the girl was flirting with me all night, and it all went over my head. The next morning she ends up texting me and I pick up on the flirting over text, and at one point she texts me saying “I’m reading your texts in your cute accent.” I see the opportunity to tell her my accent isn’t real, it’s just a bit I was doing with my friend, haha. But then she says “wanna call?” and I panic and say yes and then feel like I have to keep the accent going. 

This was a few weeks ago. We’ve been talking a lot since then and are pretty involved, and she calls me her girlfriend to some of her friends, but we haven’t really talked about what we are so I don’t know how serious she is or if she’s just joking?  But I feel like I’m so deep into this that I might have to adopt this accent as my everyday voice, because it feels too awkward and weird to tell her, and I don’t want her to like me less if I don’t have that accent? So now I’m faking an accent everytime I talk to her, and I don’t even know how to come clean. And she thinks this is just a Kansas accent.

TLDR: I introduced myself to a girl at a club with a fake accent as a joke with my friends and now I don’t know how to come clean weeks later because she likes "my" accent

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/KenmoreToast on 2026-08-06 15:17:49+00:00.

I moved to a new apartment a few months ago. My neighbor across from me keeps to herself, an older woman that I only see occasionally when she smokes on her porch.

Boxes for the trash are usually left next to the front door for a day or two. Seems like it's a lot of effort for her to take it to the dumpster.

I hear cardboard scraping, and I look out and there's a large TV box outside her door. I figure this is a good opportunity to introduce myself and offer a hand.

I knock on the door, and it's not the woman, a man I'd never seen answers instead. My dumb ass just goes with the spiel I had in mind, and ask if they needed a hand with the trash. He says no, seeming a bit annoyed, and I make it worse by saying "sorry, I had just seen an old woman here and I thought she needed help." He responds "that's my wife".

A few minutes later he's taking the box to the dumpster. I probably just came off as an annoying neighbor nagging them to throw away their trash.

TL;DR I assumed my neighbor was old and needed help, and came off as a jerk by offering it.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/HarlemHarlowe on 2026-08-06 11:12:40+00:00.

So a few years ago my husband bought me one of those safety keychains. The ones with a taser, pepper spray, 'kitty' shaped knuckles, window breaker etc. I didn't have a lot of use for it but it was from my husband so I kept it. After about a year I realised that the paper spray was somehow empty, even though I'd never used it.

In the end, threw away the empty spray canister, stored away the knuckles and window breaker parts, but kept the taser in its little Velcro pouch in my work bag.

Come to this morning, the taser catches my eye in my work bag, so I take it out to see if it still works. I open the Velcro patch on the pouch and push the on switch. Within seconds my throat and nose are BURNING! I'm coughing like I'm going to hack up a lung, my nose feels like its on fire and is running like a faucet. Because of all of this my eyes start streaming, but there's no pain.

I fumble to the bathroom for some toilet paper to wipe my nose. I also try to wipe the tears from my eyes with my hands. Bad idea.... Suddenly the skin around my eyes is also on fire.

This is all within 30 seconds of opening the Velcro on the long forgotten taser. I have no idea what has happened, I think I'm dying, about to vomit from how hard I'm coughing, can't breathe through my nose, and now can't open my eyes with the pain.

I managed to fill a cup of water from the sink and get it down my throat to somewhat soothe the throat. My nose is still stinging but is definitely the least affected of the three. I made my way through half open eyes to the freezer to put some ice on my eyes. The ices soothes the pain to the point where I can start to wonder what the fuck just happened to me.

With one hand I go to google and ask, how can a taser do this to me??!

Turns out that the oil based capsaicin trapped in the Velcro can stay there for a long ass time. And me opening that Velcro patch on the taser pouch launched the residual pepper spray straight at my face and hands.

At least the internet was able to tell me what happened, otherwise I'd still be sitting here wondering.

So yay, its 4 hours later and the skin around my eyes still feels like its been sunburned.....

TL;DR: Didn't realise there was residual pepper spray on the Velcro of the taser pouch. Opened the Velcro which then sprayed that residue onto my face and hands, I then spent 10 minutes fumbling and thinking WTF just happened.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Flaky-Location3071 on 2026-08-06 14:31:46+00:00.

This happened in the last two days basically. Since my friends were on holiday they asked me to water their plants at their place. Tuesday was the last day I wanted to check on them before they got back from holiday. I opened the roof window (they live on the top floor with a slanted roof) right above their couch to air out their place a bit, while I watered the plants. Then I left home, forgetting the window was open, and then that same night (Tuesday-Wednesday night) the heavy rain came..

Yesterday night (Wednesday-Thursday night) they came back and texted me when the last time was I was at their place and when it had rained, because there was a window open, and their couch was soaked and their untreated wooden floors (!!) had a lot of water. FUCK.

Needless to say, their floor is probably ruined: they said the boards were soft from all the soaked up rain, and you could see the water rings where the water had been standing. Furthermore, they have this elevation in their house, this is why I could open the window that is on the slanted roof top. the water has dripped down the side of the walls and now the wall paper is peeling off, and due to the shape of their house they will likely have to redo the entire wall of wall paper. Their couch is now dry and hopefully no mould, but their wooden side table now also has cracked and damaged edges from the water. All in all, quite some damage. Adn thats just hoping no integrity damage to the walls and floor from the long-standing water.

To make matters that much worse, I don't have insurance because my executive-dysfunction ass just never thought to *actually* get insurance at any point in the last year, so yeah, I hope I can actually cover the damage costs (actually hope their insurance can cover most of it), but mostly I am so upset that I ruined their house when I actually woke up that night with a panic about whether I had closed the window or not, and had I just gone in the next day to check, I could have started on damage-control much earlier, or even better: HAD I JUST CLOSED THE FUCKING WINDOW everything would have been fine and they would have gotten home to their lovely (and still intact) home after a long journey back from holidays. But instead they have this whole situation now and it's my fault.

TL:DR; my friends were on holiday, I forgot to close the window, heavy rainfall, wall paper, wooden floors, wooden furniture exposed to 24hr water damage (and I don't have insurance).

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/G0TH1C_IDIOT on 2026-08-06 03:17:00+00:00.

The FU has actually occurred over a series of weeks. I'm (20f) a bit embarrassed to even admit I've fallen for something like this. But I have very thick 4b hair that is very difficult to take care of, especially during the summer. So I like to get my hair braided during the hotter seasons. My usual stylist is amazing, but there are some styles I like that she doesn't know how to do. So back in 2025 when I noticed my friend had gotten her braids freshly done, I ended up asking her who did them and asked for her socials.

I reached out to this stylist (20sf) and told her that my friend recommended her to me and asked when she'd be able to do hair. I asked for her website so I could book an appointment and ended up getting emailed an invoice. When the appointment came, everything went well, so I ended up going to her another 3 or 4 times.

But fast forward to this summer, I reached out to her again because I wanted purple box braids. We initially settled for a Friday last July, and the day before I asked for her address again (she moved and I couldn't remember what her new address was), but then she told me she actually had a doctor's appointment and asked to reschedule. I agreed, but thought that was weird, because why would you agree to do hair if you have a doctor's appointment on that same day? Unless she forgot. But it was fine, we rescheduled for the following Sunday, but then a few hours before the appointment, she told me that she got into a wreck Saturday night and was in the ER all night. And that she had just gotten home but had to go back. I told her I was sorry to hear that and waited a little bit to ask if we could reschedule, since I figured she needed space.

But then I saw that she was posting selfies on her Snapchat and thought it was strange that there was no mention of an ER or wreck, just a picture of her in a crop top with her tongue out. I messaged her asking to reschedule, and we agreed on a Thursday at 11am. I asked her again to send the address and she said she would, but when Thursday rolls around, she doesn't. In fact, she asks if I can come at 12pm instead because she's still finishing hair on someone else. I reluctantly agreed since I worked later that day and wasn't totally sure she'd be done on time, but then 12:38 rolls around and I still don't hear from her. As of today writing this post, it has been 5 days since I've heard from her. Snapchat says that she hasn't opened my message, yet she's constantly posting on her stories.

That's just it. And then I thought about how stupid it was of me to trust someone who asks to pay upfront before offering services, but since I had previously paid her before and gotten my hair done, plus we had somewhat of a decent rapport whenever she worked with my hair, I sorta assumed she'd be fine and that the upfront charge was just a way to discourage last minute cancellers or no shows. But no, I've been scammed and lost $195. The style I wanted was $165, but I paid her separately an extra $30 for a blowout. Here's where I realize I've FU even more: on Cashapp, I've gotten so used to titling my transactions as "gift" so that business owners don't get an extra charge. The $165 transaction was listed as a gift, but after she flaked on me the first time I titled the $30 transaction as "blowout".

I've vented about this ashamedly to coworkers and then my mother, and they all advised me to take her to small claims court to try and get my money back since she's ignoring me, but part of me is scared that this won't work since one of the transactions is listed as a gift. Plus, the most damning evidence of a scam was deleted by Snapchat since the messages had grown old, and at the time that she was messaging me about the doctor's appointment and then the wreck, I didn't think she was trying to scam me. I do have a picture of our exchange when she tells me to come later, then completely ghosts me, but I don't think it's enough. I filed a police report and was told that what she did may count as a misdemeanor theft crime, but that my best bet would be an affidavit since the transactions were a mutual agreement and that there currently wasn't much they could do.

I guess I've learned a very important lesson.

TL;DR: I trusted a stylist who had previously done my hair before, to do it again, only to get scammed and ghosted by her. And I didn't get a chance to take a photo of all of the evidence that she ghosted me, so I likely will not get that money back.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/AwesomeOpossum404 on 2026-08-06 00:30:31+00:00.

I was ordering food at Wendy’s drive-through today and got one of their combo meals. I got a burger and fries, and for my drink I asked for a Sprite.

I paid for my food at the window, they handed me my bag and drink, and I drove off.

I was just about to leave the parking lot and I looked down at my cup, and I was like “This really looks like water. Did they mix up and give me water instead of Sprite?”

So my dumbass goes back through the drive-through and I go back to the window and say that I ordered a combo meal with Sprite as my drink, but they gave me water instead, and if they could swap it out with a cup of Sprite. The worker looked so confused and told me that I did get Sprite, and I was like “Really? I thought that this was water”

Then they asked me to taste it. I did. It was fucking Sprite. The fucking embarrassment I felt when I tasted the Sprite was a feeling I will never forget.

I apologized and drove off. Why didn’t I taste it before going back into the drive-through and embarrassing myself omg 😭

TL;DR: I told a fast food worker that they gave me water. They asked me to taste it, and I realized I was wrong

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Electronic_Key1521 on 2026-08-05 22:05:06+00:00.

An update from https://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/s/ZgXXD3WQGg

A couple days after I posted that, I sent my friend (the hostess) a message:

“Hey [Hostess’ Name]. I’ve been thinking about what happened and I want to apologize again now that I’ve had some time to process everything.

I’m truly sorry for my behavior and for the stress and worry I caused you, your boyfriend, and everyone else there. I know you had to take care of me instead of being able to enjoy your own night, and I’m really sorry.

I also want you to know that this isn’t how I normally behave or how I treat people, and I’m deeply ashamed that this is the impression I gave you and everyone there. I’m not saying that as an excuse or justification at all. I’m incredibly remorseful.

You don’t owe me any forgiveness and you don’t have to respond. I understand if you need space. I just wanna tell you how truly genuinely sorry I am. And if there’s anyone else I should apologize to, if appropriate, I’d be willing.”

It’s been over 24 hours and I haven’t got any response. That’s okay, I don’t expect her to. And like I said in my message, she doesn’t have to and she doesn’t owe me forgiveness. I just wanted to send her a proper heartfelt apology and I won’t bother her with more. I have a tiny hope that she will reply once she’s ready but I accept if she (and probably everyone who was there) won’t ever forgive me. Altho it’s such a shame that I possibly lost some friends.

I still feel very embarrassed and regretful for what happened, but I feel a slight relief after sending her that. I appreciate everyone’s comments for telling me I have a problem. Yes, I do. I don’t deny that. I will re-evaluate my habit and lifestyle since this is a huge wake up call. I don’t think there will be any significant update after this.

Note: I’m a woman in late 20s from Jakarta, Indonesia. Not USA, like some commenters assumed.

TL;DR I got too drunk and fucked up at my friend’s housewarming party and I think she doesn’t wanna be friends with me anymore.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/kudzufarmer on 2026-08-06 00:18:11+00:00.

We had a break at work today so I decided I was going to have a few bites of beer jerky while we were talking about random stuff. For context, I dont really like jack links and the like because it's too tender, so I buy a brand that you really have to naw on, so it was quite tough.

I usually just put the entire piece in my mouth and chew for a couple minutes but the piece I grabbed was was too long for me to fit it in. So in my thoughtless head I grabbed one end with a full grip and bit down on the other. This beef jerky was so tough that I couldn't bite through it, so I had the bright idea to start pulling from both ends.

I did end up tearing it but I didn't notice how much strain I was putting on my neck. Once the connective tissue finally tore my neck jumped forward and I had an awful pain. If you ever woke up with a crick in your neck you know what I'm talking about. Now I can only turn my neck up about 20 degrees and turn to the side about 60 without being in a bunch of pain.

I told my coworker who is also a doctor (im not in the medical field, he just got bored) that I was in pain and he said there was nothing to be done but thought it was hilarious that I got "beef jerky induced whiplash". That phrase bought the attention of the rest of the group and I got peer pressured to explain my story all while I was in pain to the group of 11. Now I'm know as the guy who injured himself while eating jerky.

To top it all off we had to go to a mandatory event where we had to run for an extended amount of time and then play volleyball right after.

At least I still have my teeth.

TL;DR I fucked up by giving myself whiplash by eating a tough piece of jerky in front of all my coworkers.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Physical_Leg2061 on 2026-08-05 12:54:50+00:00.

It’s hot and sticky where I’m at. I like going commando humid days for comfort. I also nanny.

I went to work a few times wearing my Asian granny pants. Those dark colored, wide, airy ones. I was curious and decided to check the baby cam if my pants were see through because the baby’s clothes are a bit see through and they’re your usual materials. Behold, it is more than see through, it’s like nonexistent. I’m just laughing now because how many times did the parents see my ass crack and my jungle.

I’m never gona bring it up and I should probably always wear a second layer whenever I’m wearing my granny pants. I’m going to bury this embarrassment with me, I hope they do too and that we’re all just gona tuck it away in a dark corner and never visit it again. Goodbye 👋

TL;DR baby cam sees through thin clothes, I have thin clothes, I was butt ass naked in the baby cam.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Sun-Tzus-Left_Shoe on 2026-08-05 10:14:05+00:00.

I decided to take a 15 hour speedboat ride to get from one city to the next in the Amazon region of Brazil. Because it's a daytime trip and because it is consistently hot as balls here, I decided I would wear a short sleeve button up and some shorts. Wrong move. You see, I forgot the fundamental rule that all Brazilian public transport must be cooled to near-arctic levels. I have 13 hours to go, and I am seriously uncomfortable. I'm currently using a backpack to shield myself from the shearing winds of the very aggressive air conditioning unit and a bucket hat to cover part of one leg.

If you are ever taking a bus or any form of transportation for an extended period of time in Brazil, DO NOT forget a blanket. Even if it's in the middle of summer. They don't mess around with the A/C, and it's a slow and painful death.

TL;DR. Took a little trip on a speedboat in Brazil with no blanket, and now, unexpectedly, I'm going to freeze to death in a tropical country.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Suspicious_Round_375 on 2026-08-05 03:00:55+00:00.

This happened two days ago. I 33M have always been the responsible one when going out with friends. Pouring them into taxis at the end of the night, Hanging out when they puke and tucking them in afterwards. But then came my birthday And my friends decided that i should have "fun" for once. They would be the responsible ones for a change. And shockingly they were. With everyone else. They kept buying me drinks and challenging me to do shots and i figured. What the heck. I've been responsible for a decade. And i'm on vacation. Might as well try to get properly drunk for a change. Should stop them pestering me about it.

This was a few beers in.

Now for the part that made me go for this throwaway account.

This is also where i mention that i'd been constipated for a while. And i wasn't really feeling that well. I had laxatives but i kept putting it off because i had other things to do.

Well i did manage to get properly drunk. Then i got shitfaced. (Didn't really care for it but now i know what that feels like.) And in my drunken state i probably figured i wasn't going to be doing much apart from dealing with a hangover so it would be the perfect time to take the laxatives. They were supposed to work after 6-12 hours so i had plenty of time to get some sleep. So i knocked a couple back and went to bed.

I was woken up by rumbling so severe that my cat was on the edge of the bed looking like an angry upside down U. Because i'm a back sleeper and he likes to sleep on my stomach. But when it roared at him he was spooked. The next part spooked me. There was a lurch inside me. Like a demon trying to escape. And a wave of pain that spoke of its rage. I immediately clenched as hard as i could and barrel rolled out of bed. Misjudging the distance and damn near knocking myself out when i hit the wall. But i shot back up. This was a fight i wasn't going to win if i didn't act fast. And my cat, realizing that i wasn't possessed by an angry bear, decides to run after his clearly distressed and very stupid big bro. He isn't smart either but he is brave. The distance between my bed and toilet is just eight meters. But the hallway felt like a marathon. That's when i realize to my horror that the bathroom door was closed. I never close it. Why was it closed. Alcohol and stupidity is why. My barely awake and pickled brain struggled for precious moments to figure out how a door handle works before it finally managed to find a spare neuron that wasn't going "Oh shit oh shit oh shit!, after which i just about ripped the door of its hinges. Take the last few wobbly steps, and flop down on the toilet with all the grace of a grand piano tumbling down a set of stairs. In complete darkness by the by. As i didn't have time to fumble for the light switch.

Only to realize the lid is down when i sat on my nuts. Pain and panic rising even further i force myself off of them, yank the lid up enough to clear my ass as it came back down. A lot further than intended as i had pulled the seat up with the lid. I almost catch myself on the sink but managed to grab the shower curtain. But the latter is ripped off the pole in a spray of bent hooks. The only thing slowing my fall was the toilet block. Which is my my left cheek looks like it got in a fight with a grater... Then, fireworks. Dumb and dumber style. And all i could do was white knuckle grip the sink and force myself out of the bowl. Though i wouldn't be surprised if i was actually generating thrust at that point. My cat tried to comfort me but then the smell hit us both. He yowled as if kicked in the face and ran for dear life. I didn't have that luxury. I had to sit there. Gagging, eyes watering from the unspeakable horror i'd inflicted on myself. Knees weakening and hand slipping all the while. Cold sweat pouring from damn near everywhere. Until it finally subsided enough for me to flip the seat down. I spent the next couple of hours with a pounding headache, Severely dehydrated and nauseous. Knowing i could blame no one but myself. And with cold sink water as my only companion. Later i found the tablets. And there were four missing. Recommended dose is two. Now i know why.

Why did i take four?. I have no clue. My drunk and stupid ass probably thought it needed it. And when i'd finally stopped flushing my soul, sins and hopes down the sewage line i had to turn my attention to regaining the trust of my cat. With lots of treats and belly rubs. And airing out my apartment...

I'm just going to stick to being the babysitter and designated driver.

But if this makes someone feel better about their day then my suffering was worth it.

TL;DR: Was constipated, Got drunk about it instead. Took laxatives, traumatized my cat. Going for a high fiber diet from now on.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Yummy_Castoreum on 2026-08-05 00:41:53+00:00.

Due to recent downsizing at my organization, I'm now doing 4 people's jobs and am a little frazzled. One of the responsibilities I recently took on is creating e-learning courses.

Our courses ask for your name on the first page, so they will address you as whatever you type in. I was endlessly testing and revising the course, and to amuse myself I put in the name "asshole" so it would say "Welcome, asshole." I showed the page to my coworker and said "I think it's tired of all my revisions, it's cursing at me now!" We had a little laugh. Eventually I finished, published the course, and emailed all 750 employees the link to the course, noting that it was mandatory.

Little did I know that whatever you type into the name field during testing is saved to the file as the default text unless you erase it. So 750 people opened up a course that greeted them as "asshole."

I started receiving screenshots from supervisors immediately.

You can't delete a course file from our LMS, you can only replace it. And this file is huge, so once fixed it took a few minutes to recompile and re-save over the original. I frantically recalled the email but it was too late, the thing was out there.

Apparently I'll be hearing from the Director tomorrow. Wish me luck.

TL;DR: Accidentally called 750 people assholes, dreading the impending consequences.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Born_Excuse_5610 on 2026-08-04 22:00:18+00:00.

so I had a dentist appointment recently. the day before, I’d stuffed nothing but absolute garbage into myself. chili landjäger sausage with mustard, plus pasta salad with mayo that I’m pretty sure had gotten a little too warm… hunger drove it all in.

on the way to the dentist I could already feel a brown thunderstorm brewing inside me, a category 6 hurricane on the beer-shit scale. there were some violent winds as forerunners, hinting at the worst to come.

so at reception I first asked for the bathroom, it was my first time at this practice. the pretty blonde girl, maybe 20, points at the door directly behind her. at first I thought there’d be a hallway back there and the crapper would be somewhere down it… nope. between her and the bowl: about 2 meters as the crow flies… and in between, nothing but a flimsy-ass door with a massive gap at the bottom. she literally had to scoot her chair aside so the door could even open…

so there I stood, weighing my options. holding it in was off the table — the dam already had its first cracks. the hope that she might leave her post at some point was slim to none. the waiting room was completely empty, I was the only patient, and I was up next - meaning she was literally just sitting there waiting for me.

which left basically two options… option one: a clean, controlled demolition, triggering a massive landslide that buries everything beneath it. very loud, but at least it’d be over fast. option two: carefully opening and closing the floodgates to release the brown deluge from the retention basin in stages. but that requires serious experience and a delicate touch. worst case, the gates can’t withstand the enormous pressure and you get scattered uncontrolled explosions.

I went with option two, and I was a fool to think I could move those masses silently. again and again, single brown rifle salvos rang out, which I tried to drown out with coughing - like a shitty noise-cancelling headphone with input lag. the whole thing took a felt eternity. I knew right then I’d have to switch dentists. and then there was the wretched stench that would inevitably come billowing out when I opened that door…

so I stepped out and shut the door as fast as I could. the girl had her poker face on and said, as if nothing had happened, “you can go right in.” but she couldn’t fool me. I saw it in her eyes, staring motionless straight ahead. she had gazed into the abyss. and the abyss had gazed back into her.

TL;DR: Ate sketchy sausage and warm mayo pasta salad, then had to violently destroy a dentist’s bathroom located 2 meters behind the receptionist, separated only by a flimsy door with a gap. She heard everything. The abyss gazed into her.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Maleficent_Bite6521 on 2026-08-03 12:20:25+00:00.

TL;DR: I left my iPad open to a private note about my financial anxieties before marriage, and my fiancée found it. My badly named note made me look way more suspicious than I actually was.

My fiance and I use Notes for everything so I didn't think twice when I handed her my iPad to show her something. I walked away to make coffee and completely forgot I'd left my private notes open instead of the shared one.

The note she saw was basically a running list of financial questions I'd been keeping for myself before bringing them up with her. Things about buying a house, combining finances and a few other what ifs that had been bouncing around in my head.

When I came back, she asked why I had a note that looked like I was preparing for marriage to fail. I realized the title, "Things We Need to Figure Out Before Marriage," sounded way worse than what was actually inside.

We talked it out and she's not upset anymore but I definitely learned that if you're going to keep a private brain dump maybe don't give it the most dramatic title possible.

TIFU by accidentally making myself look way more suspicious than I actually am

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/CreamOnMyNipples on 2026-08-04 20:52:32+00:00.

Sometime in 2020, my friend sent me a Venmo with the note “CBT, cock and ball torture” as a joke. I probably paid for his lunch or something like that, but we like putting stupid things in the notes.

Anyway, after I received that note I decided it would be best to set my Venmo transactions to private. Today I found out that changing this setting only applies to all future transactions. For the last 6 years, the first thing people see when they look at my account is “CBT, cock and ball torture”

This only came to my attention because I picked up lunch for coworkers, and my boss was paying me back and said, “You have some interesting transactions.” I was horrified, I had no idea this was there. Every person that has sent me money, my distant aunt that sends me money on my birthday every year, has to have seen this. I have no idea how many people witnessed it.

Thankfully my boss is cool, but I’d rather she didn’t forever associate me with CBT now…

TL;DR: Setting your Venmo account to Private only affects future transactions. “CBT, cock and ball torture” has been at the top of my account page for 6 years

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/prtafjs on 2026-08-04 12:14:08+00:00.

So, this actually happend yesterday during my eveningshift.

I am a nursing student in the Netherlands and was taking care of this lovely elderly woman (89 years old). Next to her laid a black english man (this is relevant) and across from her another lady.

I was checking her IV pump and making small talk when she pointed next to me and said:

"The black one was out for a bit"

Huh??? I thought to myself, did she really just tell me that the patient next to her, 'the black one' left the room for a bit?

I told her "ma'am, we don't talk about people in that way, we don't say 'the black one' when referring to your neigbour patient".

She looked at me with a thousand question marks above her head. I looked back at her, also confused.

Then she said, "What? The black cable was out of the pump for a bit"

"The black one" wasn't the person next to her. It was the charging cable.

I felt an immediate feeling of cringe in my heart. The lady looked at me and started laughing incredibly hard.

The other lady across from her also started laughing at my miscommunication.

I started apologizing like crazy, "I'm so sorry I really thought you meant the man laying next to you by the way you pointed and said that"

She started laughing even harder.

Have you ever been laughed at by a 89 year old grandma? It hits hard.

My head turned red out of shame and i kept apologizing to the lady. I'm glad the man spoke english only and didn't have a clue why the ladies were laughing at me.

Eventually I left the room, embarrased, my cheeks all flushed and red, behind me I still heard those ladies giggling together at my mistake.

I guess at least I tried to speak up for someone, even though it was not necessary.

TL;DR: I thought I stood up against casual racism when an elderly patient said "the black one", whole time she was talking about a black charging cable instead of the black patient next to her :$

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/achingdune_404 on 2026-08-04 03:50:15+00:00.

So this didn't happen today but to this day I still kick myself in the face when the memory unfortunately plays in my head during the day and keeps me awake at night.

My mom and I are pretty open with each other about tmi conversations like our bathroom trips. Not a day goes by where I don't tell her about my poop experiences for the day. One day at work, I was having some stomach issues and I had spent the day going back and forth to and from the bathroom and texting her about it. Saying things like “omg a fart just came out so loud it echoed in the toilet” and “uh oh it's all liquid”.

That day, one of the owners of the store was there to do some interior cosmetics which meant he was near the bathrooms a lot and I was trying to silently do my business without too much noise. He had texted me while I was in the bathroom and told me since it was so slow, I could leave early if I wanted. I responded that I would and so I finished up my business to head out. But when I flushed the toilet, the dookie water rose instead of going down. You know how you have those poops that take a million wipes and each wipe somehow still has a smear on it? Yeah. It was that. And I may have used a little too much toilet paper. I panicked and did what I usually do. I texted my mom.

“OH MY GOD I JUST CLOGGED THE TOILET”

“THE TOILET IS CLOGGED AND ITS ALL MY FAULT”

My mom has an android. I have an iPhone. Our texts are green for my end. These texts were blue. I checked who I was texting. The owner. My heart sank. My face turned hot and tomato red. I dropped to my knees on the bathroom floor and stared at my texts. My eyes have never been that wide and my jaw has never been so dropped.

I panicked and texted “jkjk” and immediately called my mom for help. I sat on the bathroom floor next to the clogged dookie water and cried while asking my mom what to do. I couldn't go out and face him. Especially since he replied. He sent a smiling emoji and a laughing emoji. That was it. My face was too red to face anybody. I had already been in there for so long that everybody probably knew I was taking a dump. I had no choice but to dry my tears, plunge the toilet, and run out before anyone could make eye contact with me. So I did just that. I unclogged the toilet and stayed on the phone with my mom while rushing out and clocking out for the day just to make it seem like I was in there for so long because I was on a phone call. But even with my attempt to be nonchalant, I blew my cover.

I spent my entire drive home freaking out about what happened and calling anybody I could so I wouldn't be alone in the panic. But of course I had to make things worse for myself. I texted him again. Unprompted, unnecessarily, and regretfully, I said “that was so embarrassing but we've been having toilet issues and I thought it was my turn to deal with it but it's okay because it all went down”.

“It all went down”??!!! What was I thinking??!!! He left me on read after that. This memory haunts me every day and I had to let it out somewhere. I've learned my lesson and I check who I'm texted every time now. I fear this is one of the biggest fuck ups of my life.

TL;DR- I accidentally texted one of the owners of the company I work for instead of my mom about clogging the toilet while him and I were working together.