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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/LankyGuitar6528 on 2026-08-07 13:43:04+00:00.
The vet said the omegas would be good for my elderly dog's joints. So I went to my local pet store. The stuff cost $25... but I had a return to balance it out - $25 of canned dog food our dog hated (and the pet store allows returns of unopened pet food). They have me on the computer and when I bought the dog food they promised the return would be simple if she didn't like it
But it wasn't simple. A new hire printed out reams of paper, swiped my card 5 times, charged me twice, refunded me 3 times and then had to charge me again... so by the time these transactions were finished I was holding 5 miles of cash register tape trying to figure out what was going on.
The next day... I couldn't find the fish oil. FML! Then I just KNEW what happened. That new hire had me all flustered and I left my fish oil at the store. I searched high and low - no fish oil. Clearly they owed me a bottle of fish oil. So back I go. This time - the new hire was in the back somewhere. The owner was on the till, there was a huge lineup... I tried to explain but she just waved me away and said I could have the bottle and out I go fish oil in hand.
Later in the day I'm driving along and a 2nd bottle of fish oil rolls out from under the seat of my car. FML! I had it the whole time? Damnit. I could keep it but that would be dishonest and this is a local store not some big chain... that's not right. I could return it to them and admit my stupidity. Then inspiration hit... why not just buy this 2nd bottle? Good for the store, makes me look good... I didn't really need two bottles of fish oil but wouldn't that be better than admitting I'm a moron? So back I go to the pet store.
This time I walked in and of course the new hire is working the till. I handed her my bottle of fish oil and said I would like to buy it. She said "but you brought this in with you?!" I yaddayadda'd over my story omitting the parts that made me look stupid.
Then another new hire comes out... sees new hire #1 in distress poking buttons on the till, asks what's happening. New hire #1 mutters to New HIre #2 that I took a bottle of fish oil without paying, returned and now want to pay for it. Together glare at me as I swipe my card and watch me all the way out the door muttering to each other. But wait... where was the cheering? Where was the "what a great guy?" Nothing?
Thinking over my story... I guess I basically told New Hire that I had shoplifted the bottle, had a crisis of conscience and returned to pay. Which... ok... well... yes... but also NO! I didn't shop lift it! Well.. ok yes I kinda did... but also NO!
Now I have $50 worth of fish oil and I can never go back to that store. *sigh*
TL;DR I took a bottle of fish oil from a pet store I wasn't entitled to, returned to pay and sort of made myself look like a criminal.