this post was submitted on 21 Nov 2023
349 points (98.1% liked)

Funny: Home of the Haha

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[–] [email protected] 41 points 11 months ago (3 children)

Sharks never went to church either, and they’ve survived all five of the extinction events.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 11 months ago (2 children)

They do go to church actually. All surviving species do. You were just so absorbed in your sinful activities that you never took the time to learn more about them.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 11 months ago

He died for their fins

[–] [email protected] 5 points 11 months ago (1 children)

The First United Church of Chomp

[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago

The Eucharist is surfer blood and sea biscuits.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 11 months ago (1 children)

The ocean is god's blindspot.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Because the ocean has other gods.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 11 months ago
[–] [email protected] 1 points 11 months ago

Also dinosaurs were around for about 160 million years .... our species ancestors have only been around for about two million and the ones that even remotely look and act like us have only been around for about 50,000 years.

[–] [email protected] 29 points 11 months ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 8 points 11 months ago

A man of the claw!

[–] [email protected] 7 points 11 months ago (1 children)

This is one of those so bad its good movies

[–] [email protected] 7 points 11 months ago

And it has ninjas!

[–] [email protected] 15 points 11 months ago (1 children)

How do we know? Dinos ruled the Earth for 165 million years. Humans have only been around for 300,000 years. For all we know, Dinos might have even built spaceships and left the planet to colonize other star systems in the Delta Quadrant.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 11 months ago

Sanctuary of the holy space salamander

[–] [email protected] 15 points 11 months ago

Neither do ants. They are in sects

[–] [email protected] 9 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Dinosaurs never gave me twenty dollars, neither, and see what happened to 'em. That's not a threat, it's just a fact.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

I did hear of one that asked to borrow about tree fiddy.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 11 months ago

They ate, fucked, and generally dominated the planet for millions of years until they were taken out by an external factor.

How's humanity doing for comparison? We have cell phones, religion, racisim, mysogony, wars, and microwavable bacon. Oh, and we'll probably end up destroying ourselves because we choose to live where its either too hot or too cold.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 11 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 12 points 11 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 8 points 11 months ago (2 children)

Therapods live! We call them birds. Stay out of church and you might fly like an angel some day 👍

[–] [email protected] 3 points 11 months ago

Or be as mysterious as Horseshoe crab and coelacanth👌

[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Is this why people insist birds aren't real?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 11 months ago

Birds Aren’t Real? How a Conspiracy Takes Flight | Peter McIndoe | TED
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3VEkzweBJPM

[–] [email protected] 3 points 11 months ago (3 children)

Five services! Is that normal? I remember one, sometimes two, when I was a kid going to church.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 11 months ago

Look... do you want the asteroid to come back?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 11 months ago

I thought two was normal. A morning and afternoon service.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago

Where I live (France countryside) there's only one priest for the 4 nearest towns ; he's rotating churches like 2 on Saturday then 2 on Sunday.

Guess on weekdays he's scratching his balls or ~~something~~ someone else's.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 11 months ago (1 children)

How the fuck do they know? Maybe they did!

[–] [email protected] 3 points 11 months ago

Maybe they did go to church, but I bet it was the wrong one.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago

Those damned dinos.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago

I thought Jesus rode on them?