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But Springfield and North Haverbrook have datacentres!
🎶 Data center! Data center! Data center!!!!!
Is there a chance the grid could bend?
That should absolutely be a career ending statement.
If this was a proper country he’d have people already outside his home and office
Who's bringing the rotten produce?
It would be, if people voted in municipal elections.
Data centers have a habit of increasing voter turnout, in some cases by over 100%.
The best way to get people to engage with local politics is to piss them off.
Doesn't this only work if you piss them off about something you wanna change like "isn't it stupid how few data centers there are? We all want data centers but these stupid renters with shitty wages are always in our way, we should create build more data centers! We have to throw out the stupid renters and their shitty wages!"
Shake harder boy, shake harder.
Shelbyville? Don't they have a monorail?
I used to take the ferry over there with an onion on my belt, which was the style at the time.
My story begins in nineteen-dickety-two. We had to say dickety because the Kaiser had stolen our word twenty
If they're renters they have no economic roots and will simply move somewhere that has jobs and no data centers, or at least jobs. You live in Indiana. You should know this.
"Why is my small city dying? this is all Indianapolis's fault, oh I hate those city slickers so, daddy gubmint pls halp"
And with that, a mighty cheer went up from the heroes of Shelbyville. They had banished the awful lemon tree forever, because it was haunted. Now let's all celebrate with a cool glass of turnip juice.
And why doesn't this mayor have an issue with their poor constituents being stuck in "shitty houses"
Is this that same kind of tactic as like “anyone who doesn’t want to go to war with Iraq is gay?”
SO MAKE RENT AFFORDABLE AND HOUSING AVAILABLE, MAYOR DUMBASS!
I'm sure the Mayor of New Albany, and the Falls of The Ohio preservation society have some choice words for the Mayor of Shelbyville.
And marry their attractive cousins
I mean, in the US they likely are though. It's hard out here for a G
Where the fuck is shelbyville?
Some shitholy state no doubt, or the southern half of a mid tier norther midwest one.
Where the fuck is shelbyville? Some shitholy state no doubt
For the sake of accessibility, I've translated the relevant part of the article so it's easier for you to read:
India?
Yes. It's the state where American Indianans come from, naturally.
That’s Shelbai ville.
Coincidentally also low rent with shitty houses.
India? Huh.
INDEPENDENT
or something I dunno
this post was submitted on 04 Jun 2026
234 points (99.6% liked)
A Boring Dystopia
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