588
raptur(ul)e (eattherich.club)
submitted 2 years ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
all 28 comments
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[-] [email protected] 64 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

Or, ya know, maybe just the result of metabolic acidosis from kidney disease, kidney failure or untreated diabetes.

[-] [email protected] 22 points 2 years ago

Yeah but that's not as marketable.

[-] [email protected] 14 points 2 years ago

So bro was sitting in this chair butt ass naked to where their skin was making direct contact like that? They better hope he got raptured cause that's so much less embarrassing. I can just hear the Shlick of the leather as it clings to their sweaty, acidosis riddled skin.

[-] [email protected] 12 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

Acidic sweat could slowly leech the tanning chemicals from the leather. Him or her being naked isn't necessary. More likely to happen somewhere warm and humid, though. Probably the US southeast, like Louisiana, Florida, or similar.

[-] [email protected] 10 points 2 years ago

As much as I want this to be true, someone said it's most likely just the tar and chemicals from a heavy smoker which darkened a light chair but your idea is cooler.

[-] [email protected] 53 points 2 years ago

Damn, must have been a smoker.

[-] [email protected] 34 points 2 years ago

“We’re anti-science, but this is the chair our son was sitting in when he spontaneously combusted. Price firm.”

[-] [email protected] 20 points 2 years ago

Really, it's a light colored chair discolored by smoking everywhere but where it was covered.

[-] [email protected] 42 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

That foot rest looks so uncomfortable

[-] [email protected] 35 points 2 years ago

I think someone might have died in that chair.

[-] [email protected] 8 points 2 years ago

That would still be the case if the post was true

[-] [email protected] 28 points 2 years ago

Rapture happened but it ended up being only one guy.

[-] [email protected] 18 points 2 years ago

I like the presumption that everyone in this conversation is post rapture, and that we all gotta come to terms with plan B.

[-] [email protected] 18 points 2 years ago

Are they implying that being raptured would somehow leave that image on the chair? Because that doesn't make sense even given how silly the idea of the rapture is.

[-] [email protected] 52 points 2 years ago

In the reality where people can be raptured, what is logically incoherent about rapture causing slight discoloration of furniture? For me, if there’s difficulty in suspension of disbelief, it’s in the former part, not the latter.

[-] [email protected] 11 points 2 years ago

Because rapturing doesn't stain leather. It's just a ridiculous notion.

[-] [email protected] 43 points 2 years ago

As a licensed rapturologist I can verify that rapture events do leave stains on organic material. It's the same miraculo-chemical process that burns Jesus' face into the toast of true believers.

[-] [email protected] 18 points 2 years ago

Evidence: Shroud of Turin

Checkmate Atheists

[-] [email protected] 10 points 2 years ago

Unironically this is a pretty good piece of "evidence" - don't get me wrong rapturing isn't real, but we're talking about internal consistency here, not reality - if rapturing is real, then the Shroud of Turin is real, which means that the marks left on it must be typical for divine dissappearing acts 🤷🏼‍♂️

[-] [email protected] 8 points 2 years ago

If the Shroud was genuine, someone from the UK would have put baked beans on it.

Checkmate, theists

[-] [email protected] 2 points 2 years ago
[-] [email protected] 2 points 2 years ago

It's a joke about how religious people keep claiming to see Jesus' face on toast and how baked beans on toast is the UK equivalent of a PB&J sandwich

[-] [email protected] 29 points 2 years ago

Why not? It’s like saying, “Witches don’t exist, but if they did, it’s ridiculous to think that they can make love potions.” I would even go so far as to say leaving “shadows” behind is a standard part of rapture lore.

I guess I’m just a lot less confident about how rapture physics works than some folks.

[-] [email protected] 13 points 2 years ago

im dead 💀

[-] [email protected] 8 points 2 years ago

Get tons of money from Christians with this one easy trick!

this post was submitted on 06 Nov 2023
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