This is an automated archive made by the Lemmit Bot.

The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/aftenbladet on 2026-02-17 08:42:40+00:00.

(AI free with the spelling and formating mistakes of a non native speaker)

My danish friend love to go camping here in Norway, and especially if its freezing. Well Im the guy that never says no, so thats how we end up some weird places.

This weekends camping location was set in beautiful Jøssingfjord, in a closed off road tunnel with a nice view down the fjord. I bet you can find it if you google it.

Everything was going great. We had just gotten a good fire going, cooked our butchers sausages and even had a little stamp on the tounge for good measure. Then I felt it..

It was the all too familiar bubling and gargling in the lower back. You know what Im talking about, we have all felt it. And we all know all to well what must happen next.

I quickly went trough my options with my friend. He welcomed me to take this horrid dump in the very tunnel we were staying. Claiming it was windy and even snow in the air outside. So tunnel was better than nothing.

Luckily enough, when parking for the night I spotted a little red building at a viewpoint only 350m away. I mustered up some courage, sad goodbye and started wadling up there in my winter gear, butcheeks clenched.

It was such a good feeling to spot the little outhouse between snowflakes drifting. It was only 350m uphill, but being the master of my brown star for that distanse felt like a victory.

I did however discover some issues. The outhouse door lock was not in great shape. I couldnt manage to open the door at first. It seemed they even secured it with a wooden board and a few screws.

I looked over my shoulder, into the cold snowy weather, calculated my options and then proceeded to rip that board off and enteret what was, at the time, heaven.

Im talking heated room, automatic lighting, stainless and clean.

I happily undressed my endless layers of winter clothing, sat down and unleashed the beast within me. I wont get into any details, as Im sure you have seen and felt it yourself a few times.

I didnt mind the smell, sounds and even the cleanup was completely fine. Because I knew being hunched over in a tunnel doing the same would be a nightmare.

It was all going so very well. I just had to reach back to flush and CLICK.. nothing. What the hell. CLICK CLICK CLICK.

It dawned on me. The boarded door, the cleaning list being last signed in October. It was still very clean, at least before I sat down.

Christ, they shut off the water for the winter. Its probably to prevent the supply from freezing.

There was no way back. I couldnt scoop the partialy solid feces up and throw it out. No, I just had to be that guy. The guy the cleanup crew will swear at, maybe even puke after it all have been sitting in a heated room all winter until spring. Just fermenting shit mixed with TP.

For that I am very sorry, but I would do it all again. In a heartbeat.

TL:DR Had to break into an outhouse for code brown, realized too late there was no water to flush with and that I probably broke a law or two when entering.