It would probably be safer with some warfarin on board, too.

Please

About 48x a daily aspirin is the maximum dose in 24 hours.

Embroider this on a pillow.

He must think there’s somebody stupid enough out there to believe what he had to say.

There are 77 million of them.

Asking for an entire planet

The very fact that he's still alive is proof that prayers don't work.

Maybe a hamberder or two will do it. One can only hope.

Maybe he should!

I could very easily see him taking aspirin on his own.

He wakes up and decides to put on that hideous orange concealer every day. No one is telling him to do that, he found that on his own and thought it was great and decided to wear it everyday. Why is it so hard to believe that he pops an aspirin everyday off some decades old advice about baby aspirin that he misunderstood?

I don’t. I hope he strokes out and becomes trapped in his own body. I want MAGA to see a frail, weak, pathetic flesh bag.

Accidentally shits his pants in a mcdonalds and the sudden change in pressure in his body causes his organs to collapse all at once and as he falls to the floor, with his dying breath, he exclaims:

"doctors tell me i have the best death, actually, some say , in the world. They dont make deaths like they used to, but im bringing them back, good deaths, they will be back, they will come back, the good deaths, i think, like rambo. It'll be like the movies, with the action hero... err... the guys with the guns, they dont get hit, the hullets just miss em, like me. Bullets cant get me, they tried to do it, i was on stage, it was a BIG event and the democrats, biden, they tried to shoot me. They failed, they missed, because they needed republican guns. If that was a republican they wouldnt have missed, my brains would be all over the crowd behind me. They would have needed staws to clean it all up, so i am bringing back plastic straws, not those paper ones, they fall apart in your mouth....."

Reports of the rest of what he said differ vastly.

I hope it's of natural causes on live TV

There was a time, not too long ago, when I would have thought this was satire. I still hope this is satire.

I do. I care very much. I hope he continues to not listen to his doctors and bigly departs from their advice.

Maybe that's is why them told him to say that in the interview. Even if it's plausible i don't believe a thing that comes out of this guy's mouth without proof.