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Sounds like your (ex) friend needs help and the type that you can't provide. From the examples you've given they're probably having some shit going on, whatever it is, and it may have been an entire life of shit, I don't know. Either way, as shitty as it feels, cutting off people at a certain point is for the best for you and for them if they get the message that everyone is sick of their shit.

My ex-gf's dad (yes, her dad. A guy in his 40s or so at the time) was a complete disaster, similar-sounding to this friend. When we got together in our early 20s her parents were together and about 8 years later by the time we ended things her parents were divorced. They divorced when she was an adult which... seems uncommon? But I dunno. It was 100% on him too as far as making no effort. Kinda like your friend. He ignored all chores and responsibilities, would go drinking with his buddies all the time, drove around drunk, went to jail at some point for stealing tax money (long story). And now as far as I know he doesn't speak to his children and his ex-wife, somewhat understandably, would like to see him dead before she speaks to him. He was a complete dickhead throughout all of the shit. Refused to sign papers for a divorce he instigated by cheating and all the other shit. Complete bag of shit.

Yet I have to assume that he had something inside of him, whatever it was, eating his mind from the inside. I felt bad for him on a human level because there's no way a person can be married for 20 years+ and just cut off their son and daughter and now-ex-wife without causing some serious trauma and being started by something seriously wrong in their outlook on life. Nearly suicidal, I would think. I mean he practically destroyed everything he had, the family he had, and his daughter and son definitely loved him as a father in many ways. I know from years with my ex and her brother.

It's impossible to know why people act the way they do, like teenagers in adult bodies. They probably don't even know themselves I imagine. I think in the end all you can do at a certain point once it's damaging your life is tell them as straight as you can to seek help from professionals and you're not going to be around anymore for the bullshit.

As for the final question, yes. Besides the above-mentioned guy, who was quite friendly with me before and attempted to be afterwards (like nothing happened...), you know sometimes you just get sick of people or sometimes they do something beyond the pale and beyond the scope of morality that you can never forgive them. I've completely cut off people for petty reasons more as a mental health break for myself. I've also cut off people, one guy specifically I knew from high school and onward into our 20s, for doing egregious acts that I'll spare everyone from reading and myself from having to type. I cut that one off because he did it to my friend and I'm not like an overly-angry internet tough guy type or even real life tough guy type, but I just knew, and have had many dreams about it unfortunately, that if I ever saw him after hearing about the stuff he did that I'd want to smash his face into pavement. So, I had to just block every possible way for him contact me and it's been ok for over a decade now. I dunno, it sucks. You trust people, you like them, you spend time with them, and when they're around you maybe they're decent. When you learn how they really are around others and you can kind of step back and see that it was an act to an extent around you, it's a betrayal for sure. It sucks to know you've been manipulated into liking someone who could do these types of things. And it sucks knowing they probably don't give a shit. I mean, maybe he does. I don't know. I'm still too angry over the situation to really analyze it and feel bad for him in any capacity or question his motives at all. I probably never will. Shit just sucks sometimes and I'm not sure there's anything we can do besides cope how we can, get help if we need it, and try our best to move on and find people who don't suck.

Dude was marvel brained Funko loser who had stinky feet. He was ok to hang around for the most part but hed say stupid shit all the time. Final straw was when he slapped one of my homies after bad mouthing his favorite hockey team. Dude had major anger issues.

Think he had brain damage after some random people mugged him, didn't know him before that incident tho.

yes, transphobes get the wall

Yeah but I just ghosted him. Found out he was a compulsive liar. I still maintained the friendship for a little while, but then there was a whole thing where he cheated on his girlfriend and started lying to everyone about it. I wasn't close to her or anything, but I just kinda got disgusted him lying to my face when I knew the story from another source. Then I remembered other moments in our friendship where in hindsight it seemed like he was definitely lying. It kinda messes with me because I'll get dreams occasionally where we run into each other and it's super awkward.

can't dump a long-term friend if you've never had one

I dumped all of them, we grew up on the same block and hood, and every single one of them grew into chauvinistic narcissistic women beaters and beater apologist. From kids to the age of 26 I was too blinded by excessive alcoholism and cocaine addiction to realize I was being used by them and when I attempted to take my own life at my rock bottom all of them showed me who they truly were. The only thing I regret is not having a time machine to tell my younger self to grow away from them sooner.

Always look at how people treat others because it's a reflection of how they'll treat you

It took me a while to learn that he doesn't know how to fucking talk to people, especially once they are in a relationship and have less time for him. He is constantly lashing out at everyone around him, even "friends." He still gets into fights with his parents too. I recently realized I can smell his nasty dogs on him because he doesnt clean his house or his clothes or maybe even himself so that seems like depression. It doesnt help my gf and him got into a fight of their own, but that stemmed from how he constantly talks like an asshole to literally everyone, and begins most sentences with "well" or "well actually" and can never admit he's wrong. Ever. Almost everyone he is friends with has a wife or gf, and none of the wives or gfs like him at alllllll. At best they tolerate him. He's not getting invited to friend vacations or dinners because he's a fucking pill to be around and when you want him to be a normal person in a social situation (instead of just a rabid anarchist all the time) he will proudly declare because that is who he is and he isn't changing.

https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLa0x7DaDYP_vMQwyTqckCV7nM7KfNMs-B