And don't forget to teach all the kids how to fix an electrical socket, change a tire, build a computer.
post
Jokes on you lady, I only have sons, so boys do every chore.
Jokes on you lady, Thanksgiving isn't for another 320 days, 12 hours, and 50 minutes 😤
Jokes on you lady, what's thanksgiving?
Dad taught us that there is no such thing as women's work ..... there's just work.
Once you live on your own or in a space without women, you quickly realize how no one cares who does the dishes, washes your clothes or mops your floor.
Unless of course you want to live like a wild animal.
And make your kids help with stuff regardless of gender. So many people grow up without basic life skills bc parents didn't involve them in activities regardless of the gender-coded-ness of those activities.
My mom deliberately didn’t give us chores, because she grew up with a strict father who overwhelmed her with them.
It backfired. I entered adulthood not even knowing how to use a broom. My first boss thought it was hilarious.
Please, teach your kid these skills. However, don’t use them as punishment! That just makes them all the harder to do independently. I have an ex who associated cleaning with being punished and, as a result, never volunteered to do it. Every household chore fell on me.
Please, teach your kid these skills. However, don’t use them as punishment!
This is the line to walk. I've framed chores with my son as 'personal responsibility'.
While at 12 he still struggles with the broom (I'll let him hand vac if that's what he prefers), he knows how to do his own laundry and cleans his bathroom himself often enough too. Chores are a part of living, do your part, I say. I grew up the eldest daughter of a home with no mother, everything fell to me. But I'm not going to ricochet that back and have my son be useless. It's a balance, to be helpful and responsible, this is the goal.
I have a friend who's wife refuses to let anyone in the house do chores because "Nobody does it the right way". Then gets completely overwhelmed with the amount of chores she has to do, and takes it out on my friend.
She seems to completely miss the point of teaching people "the right way" or "practice".
My kids are expected to do a chore a day, I have a list of available options with the only rule that most things can only be done once a week. I don't need the windows wiped down every single day, but Dishes and Laundry are always available. Even if they do something poorly, it is less than it was before and eventually they will get it done correctly.
It'll also make it so much easier to find a soulmate. Knowing one's way around a kitchen is a godsend for all.
I know my way around the kitchen. You stabbed the plastic film with a fork and then you put it in the microwave. If I'm feeling really adventurous I'll use the air fryer.
Overheard a conversation a few years back where a group of guys were talking about how they didn't know how to cook or do laundry because that was woman's work and how they expected their mothers and / or wives to do that for them. It was so pathetic how proud they were that they could not take care of themselves.
I always wanted to help my mom with the cooking when we were growing up, but she was such a control freak that she would hardly even allow anyone else into the kitchen. I’m sure plenty of other mothers are like that, too.
Everyone better stay out of my kitchen. I'm all for teaching kids to cook. But I don't want amateurs on the field during the Super Sowl of cooking days.
I like Super Sowl. I'm pretty sure it was a typo but please leave it as is. It's got Sowl.
As a child we always did the girls cook and boys clean method, which isn't as bad as it could be, but still leaves a lot to be desired. Instilled that boys need to be part of the work, but needlessly gender divided the work anyway 😐
.... People don't do this?
All the uncles on my wives side of the family are so useless at Thanksgiving. They don't cook, clean, clear their plate or even make their own plate. Its one of the most infuriating thing I have ever seen.
Do people not normally involve their kids in this sort of thing equally?
Growing up, no.
Will my potential kids be sharing the work equally? Definitely. I always got into so much trouble for asking why I had to do housework and my brother didn't.
I hadn't realised quite how different the female upbringing experience was to the male one until I talked about it with my partner. Quite different it turns out. We're both about 40, and from Ireland, and she was absolutely expected to do shit like this when the men weren't.
Event today some of her siblings families are heavily heavily sexist.
Not in my family. Us women were expected to be the cooks, cleaners, everything. Every family get-together the men would just sit and talk and the boys would go out to play, and the older women would do the cooking, then come make the girls do the dishes.
My sister and I finally called them out on it, and to their credit they did try and make the boys help with the clean-up… although they never did that great of a job, because they’d never been taught how.
For those who are talking about how this didn't happen in your household growing up, please remember you are 1, at best 2 generations removed from full on enforcement of gender roles suppressing things like this, many times physically enforced. So yea, maybe your dad was the one who baked the turkey or did the dishes, but you can be damn sure his dad didn't.
In our house Mom was the chef and us boys were the su-chefs. If you want to live under this roof you'd better help with the cooking, serving, cleaning and everything else in the household. That's the best way to learn how to do it all yourself.
I was already rolling meatballs and frying schnitzels when I was in early high school.
Edit: I have been informed that I use Linux too much and that it is sous chef, not su-chef or sudo-chef. Although my mom is the root user.
You should be doing that all year long. These are not ferral kind. You have a responsability to parent them.
Actually, the rush of the holiday is the time when they should participate slighty less if they are not old enough to do some task independently. Because you must move quick and there is less time for teaching.
Lol, I'm a dude and, I remember when I was a kid, there was sometimes holiday stuff where the adults would make... the um... (okay I had to google it) it's called 湯圓 and I just mess with it while they were making it, I'd make weird shapes out of it lol. I don't think I actually helped, I'm just a troublemaker xD
I only know how to cook basic stuff, I suck at it. I know how to pan-fry eggs, but that's about it. I think I sort of know how to make a very basic 煎餅, from scratch, the mixing flour and egg and stuff, kinda forgot by now... but I have memories of doing it.
I kinda feel embarassed now that I talk about it. I have no life skills. (pls don't judge xD)
Society being agender-by-default, with gender being opt-in, would solve a lot of problems.
top 50 comments