580
Deserved honestly (sh.itjust.works)
submitted 5 days ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
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[-] [email protected] 63 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago)
[-] [email protected] 13 points 4 days ago
[-] [email protected] 8 points 3 days ago

you know what they say about greentext

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[-] [email protected] 16 points 4 days ago

Yes it's taken from 4chan. Not an AI image.

[-] [email protected] 8 points 3 days ago

I love 😬 that we're now at the point where "is this real?" is ambiguous between:

  • did the story factually occur in our shared reality?
  • was this story actually posted to 4chan?
  • did a human even make this image?

And at this juncture with the common addition of "chat, is this real?" we can further add:

  • does the audience exist?
  • does the person sharing the image exist?
  • do I exist?
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[-] [email protected] 12 points 4 days ago

I mean, it's usually safe to assume no when it comes to greentext, but who knows. Definitely both of them aren't real.

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[-] [email protected] 6 points 4 days ago

what is real if our eyes can't see how magnets work?

[-] [email protected] 100 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago)

Who the fuck drinks coffee while eating pasta

[-] [email protected] 66 points 5 days ago

People who are trying to make the most of a lunch break

[-] [email protected] 25 points 4 days ago

My dad. He drinks coffee with everything, including his coffee.

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[-] [email protected] 28 points 4 days ago

I’d probably guess the Italians

[-] [email protected] 22 points 4 days ago

And you would be wrong, in Italy coffee is almost never drunk while eating something salty. Actually is mostly drunk alone as its own dish, aside from breakfast

[-] [email protected] 24 points 4 days ago

And if you break this rule, THEY KILL YOU ON THE SPOT

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[-] [email protected] 16 points 4 days ago

An adhd-haver who’s on their third cup of the day at lunch, and will have 3 more over the course of the afternoon.

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[-] [email protected] 17 points 5 days ago

Why not? You can even use some pasta as a straw

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[-] [email protected] 12 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago)

Me, 5 minutes ago. What's so special about pasta and coffee combo?

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[-] [email protected] 70 points 4 days ago

I'd actually like to see someone try to slam their fist down on a table while drinking coffee without spilling.

[-] [email protected] 19 points 4 days ago

You've got to suck really hard to leverage surface tension while fisting.

Pro move but it can be done

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[-] [email protected] 28 points 4 days ago
[-] [email protected] 6 points 3 days ago

Reheated maccas is absolutely foul

[-] [email protected] 7 points 4 days ago

Delicious. Get you a double cheese from last night and nuke it for 30-45 seconds. Done and easy lunch.

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[-] [email protected] 25 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago)

Rolled a nat 20 on intimidation.

[-] [email protected] 39 points 4 days ago

a brief coworker

COWER BRIEF MORTALS

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[-] [email protected] 49 points 5 days ago

I have stabbed people with a fork for trying to touch my food.

[-] [email protected] 10 points 4 days ago

Just quickly lean towards their hand and snap your teeth like you're going to bite. Works with all sorts of unwanted touching, just be ready to actually bite if they're also nuts and try again to call your bluff. Even if they get angry they're much less likely to want to throw hands with the high possibility of getting bit hanging in the air.

The downside is you will look even more insane than with just fork stabs, but on the plus side you will look insane enough people will stay the fuck away in the future too

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[-] [email protected] 12 points 5 days ago

If it's on or near my plate I'm gonna try and eat it. It's called finger food for a reason.

[-] [email protected] 2 points 3 days ago

I've only ever thrown one person out of a ground floor window for that.

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[-] [email protected] 32 points 5 days ago

Where was this work? The prison kitchen or something?

[-] [email protected] 33 points 5 days ago

Smashburger

[-] [email protected] 33 points 5 days ago
[-] [email protected] 41 points 5 days ago

Honestly? Those break room hostilities can get intense. I learned at a young age to not fuck with a salaried man's luncheon. I believe it.

[-] [email protected] 18 points 4 days ago

Don't fuck with anyones food. Even animals get hostile.

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this post was submitted on 15 Jul 2025
580 points (96.8% liked)

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