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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Interesting_Sky_2605 on 2025-06-30 03:09:38+00:00.

My cousin Rebecca (28F) is getting married next month and my mom (52F) expects me (24F) to go. The problem is Rebecca and I haven't talked in like 3 years after this huge fight we had about something really stupid. She blocked me on social media and everything.

The wedding is also a 6 hour drive away and I'd have to take time off work and get a hotel room. Plus I don't know anyone else going except my parents and my awkward uncle. Rebecca didn't even send me an invitation directly, my mom just told me I was expected to be there.

When I told my mom I wasn't planning to go she absolutely lost it. Started crying and saying I'm tearing the family apart and how embarrassed she'll be when people ask where I am. She keeps saying family is family and I need to be the bigger person. Now my dad is involved and he's doing that disappointed dad thing where he doesn't say much but you know he thinks you're being selfish.

But like, why should I spend money and vacation days to sit awkwardly at a wedding for someone who clearly doesn't want me there? If Rebecca wanted me there she would have reached out herself right? I feel bad that my mom is upset but I also don't think I should have to pretend everything is fine just to keep the peace.

TL;DR: Refusing to go to estranged cousin's wedding, mom is devastated and making me feel like a selfish brat