On a bad day I will wake up energized and motivated, eat breakfast make plans and suddenly my mood turns exhausted and I decide to do nothing the whole day or be miserable I have to get out of the house.
Like WTF?
Could be related to your body spending energy on digesting breakfast. In my case, if I eat something to fat or sweet, or with some fruits I'm intolerant, then my day is screwed...
Good call. I eat half a pound of porridge on most mornings, that could be too much 😅.
But yeah it sucks to have your day screwed with by your own body.
The decaying meat husk that is the human body sucks and I have many complaints to give in when everything is over!
I usually go with 1/3 cup of the same thing, it's what works best for me! (Only addingv water and salt... It's bland but it works)
Anything else like peanut butter, cheese, or sweet cereal with milk will screw my stomach and bowels... I keep coffee to a minimum, and drink it black.
DO NOT TAKE MEDICAL ADVISE FROM ME. THIS IS ONLY M ANECDOTAL EXPERIENCE. ALSO I HAVE AUDHD WHICH PROBABLY WORKS DIFFERENT THAN ADHD.
I have found a couple (like 3-4) of draws? puffs? inhalations? of weed from a vape helps me immensly. Not in the 20 or so minutes afterwards when the slight high is perceiveable but up to like half a week afterwards. I can do stuff and concentrate so much better.
Ah but you see over here we put people behind bars for that very harmful crime
Focusing? Believe it or not, jail.
There's a trick but it can cause fugue states.
PLEASE WHATS THE TRICK
GIMME THE TRICK
I would love nothing more than to check out from reality. Please tell me how.
(It's psychedelics, isn't it. Been there, done that.)
Oh. Not my experience with those. But if they count; two tricks.
I don’t say that, especially not in response to someone sharing something that’s upsetting them, but it feels like there’s a connection for me at least. I’m an American immigrant in Germany and there’s a huge cultural difference in both mood (unrelated to things like depression or anxiety) and optimism between the two countries. I tried to adjust how I talk about my expectations to better fit in for a while, but it was stressing me the fuck out. When I stopped verbalizing negative expectations as much (I still do express pessimism, but only about things that I’m actually pessimistic about), I experienced fewer of them. I can’t speak for anyone else, but for me, choosing to express happiness created more happiness and choosing to express doubt created more doubt.
Friend, this is an ADHD community. Not a, "have you tried changing your outlook" community.
Which is why I’m sharing a coping skill that works for me.
I might actually do that. Happiness is tacky.
My brain is like a jujitsu master at avoiding work. I'll be like OK we've got our green tea, no distractions, pomodoro is set, tasks clearly defined and workspace prepped for focus I am figuratively taking a running charge at my work annnnnd……wait why am I looking up how PS/2 ports work? Why are there 22 tabs on this open???
It's like my brain takes all my productive energy and redirects it to fun trivia or solving the wrong problems.
Yes. ADHD means a lack of control over your attention. Having to wade against a current to stay on task, something NTs don‘t experience.
Let's meet up.
Anyone have advice for how to manage this? Or at least the depression it brings when everything feels like too mich work?
It is too much work. The problem is the system, not you. I know that's not a helpful answer 😓
Medication
This. You need to accept it's a disease. You wouldn't tell someone with a broken leg to walk it off.
I find it easier to think of it like bad eyesight, rather than a disease. We usually think of diseases as things that eventually go away, especially when there are medications for them, and that doesn't happen here.
Some people are born with good eyesight, and they can see everything clearly right from the get-go. Some people can't, and they need the external modifier of corrective lenses or, no matter how hard they try, the world will be blurry. So, they wear those corrective lenses every day just to function in the world.
Taking meds for ADHD is more like that.
Literally I use my glasses as the example whenever I face an, "it's not natural!" Argument.
Yeah, disease may have been too big of a word. I like your analogy better.
I have almost literally been told this by a doctor in a hospital.
Yes, becoming a zombie for a while then getting bored and just indulging my brain's urge to hyperfocusing on the most pointless things. It's very happy after wasting my evening figuring out how telnet works. There's always a new pointless thing to hyperfocus on, no time for depression. Not much time for anything productive either, but hey, can't have everything 😅
Also acceptance and self-forgiveness. Taking a nap. Or physical exercise, preferably outdoors.
Unpicking your personal maladaptations helps a lot. This is how therapy and medication are so useful, particularly in tandem.
Two of my big maladaptations were using stress to drive me through, and berating myself when I didn't do as well as I knew I could. It turns out that this is quite corrosive to your wellbeing, and that wellbeing is the foundation supporting your self driven. I was consuming myself for fuel.
I've gotten a lot better at redirecting my irritation. I don't get mad at myself for not doing the washing up. I get mad at the washing up for existing. It's a subtle, but powerful difference. I still do both, far too much, but I'm getting better at it.
Lastly, remember to bask in your glories. We tend to forget to enjoy the results of our effort. We just move on, and so don't get the dopamine hit. Set aside at least 10% of the time taken to bask and feel proud of yourself. To show off and enjoy. Suddenly your brain has a positive reason to power through, rather than just avoiding a negative.
Therapy (both individual and group talk therapy) helps with the emotional regulation and any childhood trauma and bad coping mechanisms you acquired by being a kid with ADD/ADHD. Medication helps with the focusing of course, both allowing you to focus for longer and sometimes (in the case of XR meds) softening the "crash" so you can have the mindfulness and focus to bring your emotional regulation tools into play and start to self regulate. I firmly believe both are necessary for some (if not most) people to be truly successful living with ADD/ADHD.
All of this plus meditation, yoga or sports like running can help too. Try it but don't force yourself if you're not into it.
Medication definitely helps as other has said. But for me when I need something extra to get through break it up and take a break in the middle
And this is what works for me, your mileage may vary
For example if I’m writing a paper first I’ll first make an outline, intro, methods, conclusion, etc. Then I just have to fill in my bullet points with general ideas. When I’m done with that I start writing intro then take a break
Another thing is what take others 3 hours to do will take me the whole day so whenever I’m at my halfway point or I’m spinning my wheels I’m the mud (which is when I’m getting no work done with lots of thoughts or zoning out) I take my break but I tell myself “I’m doing good I deserve a break, I’m doing good I can’t burnout, I looked at my calendar I’m on track. I always give myself those reassuring pep talks because I know I can’t work fast it’s just who I am
Then I take a half hour break either playing games or walking the dogs or grabbing a snack. Something I’ve noticed is different activities will help differently. For example if I’m zoning out lll walk the dogs to get back into it. If I’m still “thinking” about the paper but finding it hard to bring myself to type it out I’ll play a game
Hope this helps, it’s really about finding what works for you and which strategies work when
I get really really productive, at everything else. So like I’m freaking out about work but at least my house is clean!
Ahhh, good ol' productive procrastination!
s/emotional/irrationally angry
The lighter side of ADHD
