I've had amazing success with the tucking panties from tcomfifits. I just can't do the tape method, and these always hold everything in place when I'm out! I'll wear them the entire day and rarely feel any discomfort. My only wish is that they had a few more styles, buuut I received an email from them recently that made it seem like they might be expanding their options!
I don't tuck and don't know beyond trusting spiro to do its job. Responding because I thought the title was "advice on fucking" which I can definitely provide. :)
I'm pretty sure I'm good on that front lol
I'm not exactly sure what you'd call them in English, but I generally wear something like bike shorts? Underwear, but the kind of thing you'd have on under a skirt for modesty. They extend a short way down the leg, so there's plenty of material to hold everything in place. I combine that with some undersized panties if I'm going out and really need to make sure nothing slips.
I was this close 🤏 to going out to costco tonight tucked in my gaff and a pair of my wife's bike shorts, but I was too nervous about a ball popping out and being rather obvious and chickened out
I find pulling the underwear towards the back so it's slightly under tension helps too, by the way. And keeping your legs together when walking. But yeah, it's a constant worry :3
Alternatively just go the whole hog and wear a skirt! Then you can even go commando if you want :D
This.
Plus, for myself an orchi basically eliminated the problem, amongst others.
The ladies I know use these; https://unclockable.com/. My sister recommends them and I haven't heard any complaints from my cousin about them either.
I've tried a few some different brands for that kind of thing. Found one that fits me well and comfortably and have stuck with them (enfemme, but I suspect it's partly just normal variation in humans that leads to some people loving the other brands I tried). I didn't experience any discomfort normally and I tucked basically all-day (not night usually) everyday for about a year before starting HRT (I probably have a high threshold for pain tho). Never tried tape.
The ones that happen to fit just barely loose enough to have a nut pop out are the worse. I've gotten better with technique over time, but if they don't fit right, it's not gonna work well ime.
I'll take a look at that brand! Thanks!
I am going to ask a really silly question: Have you tried using a panty liner? (yes, the period product!) They tend to make panties a little more structured while still allowing for natural movement, and I assume it will help with a gaff too
What worked well for me early in my transition was sizing down my underwear. If I wear a medium I would wear a small, and that helped a lot. When I want things to be completely smooth down there I wear a gaff, leolines on Etsy aren’t cheap but they’re really the best I’ve owned. If you go with a gaff try find something in cotton it breathes and wicks away sweat.
I wear a tucking gaff under tight pants every day. I'm above-average size and have had the sack skin falling out issue too. Generally with tucking you want your balls pushed up into those little pockets in your upper pubic area, where they were before they descended. It'll get easier over time as your balls shrink if you're on HRT. Mine just chill out there on their own a lot of the time now after a little over a year on HRT.
This is how I do it: First, put on the gaff loosely and position the front lower than you think it should be. This is so you can hike up the sides and the back to keep it tight later. It also helps keep the sack skin contained since the gaff will be positioned to be wider further down. After that, grab the head of your penis from behind, arm behind your back and reaching between your legs, reaching into the gaff, and pull your penis back between your legs, so that the head is almost to your asshole. Don't pull your penis too too far back or it'll be painful later. Pull up the gaff, tight so the penis stays in place, with sides and back going pretty high up to keep it tight. The gaff needs to be tight! The gaff should keep your balls up in those pockets and your penis tucked under without it slipping forward.
I use BBLAIR tucking gaffs in XS size with my 36 inch hips and 29 inch waist. (For me at least, I buy bottoms based more on hip measurement rather than waist, since my hips are a lot narrower than most cis women's, or at least typical women's pants.)
The trick of wearing the front of the gaff lower than I expected seems to have done what I needed! I thought ordered a hipster gaff, but it appears I got something closer to a slingshot🤦♀️I was intending to return it if I didn't like it after trying it on for a minute, but because of my hyperfixation, it's been wedged up my ass for days, so I guess I have a really minimal gaff now!😅
I use two pices of mens underware and a bit tighter pants(usually for womens pants because the dont have that bulge space) and it works pretty well actually. I really struggled before, but that seems to do the trick for about 80-95% of the time
Transfem
A community for transfeminine people and experiences.
This is a supportive community for all transfeminine or questioning people. Anyone is welcome to participate in this community but disrupting the safety of this space for trans feminine people is unacceptable and will result in moderator action.
Debate surrounding transgender rights or acceptance will result in an immediate ban.
- Please follow the rules of the lemmy.blahaj.zone instance.
- Bigotry of any kind will not be tolerated.
- Gatekeeping will not be tolerated.
- Please be kind and respectful to all.
- Please tag NSFW topics.
- No NSFW image posts.
- Please provide content warnings where appropriate.
- Please do not repost bigoted content here.
This community is supportive of DIY HRT. Unsolicited medical advice or caution being given to people on DIY will result in moderator action.
Posters may express that they are looking for responses and support from groups with certain experiences (eg. trans people, trans people with supportive parents, trans parents.). Please respect those requests and be mindful that your experience may differ from others here.
Some helpful links:
- The Gender Dysphoria Bible // In depth explanation of the different types of gender dysphoria.
- Trans Voice Help // A community here on blahaj.zone for voice training.
- LGBTQ+ Healthcare Directory // A directory of LGBTQ+ accepting Healthcare providers.
- Trans Resistance Network // A US-based mutual aid organization to help trans people facing state violence and legal discrimination.
- TLDEF's Trans Health Project // Advice about insurance claims for gender affirming healthcare and procedures.
- TransLifeLine's ID change Library // A comprehensive guide to changing your name on any US legal document.
Support Hotlines:
- The Trevor Project // Web chat, phone call, and text message LGBTQ+ support hotline.
- TransLifeLine // A US/Canada LGBTQ+ phone support hotline service. The US line has Spanish support.
- LGBT Youthline.ca // A Canadian LGBT hotline support service with phone call and web chat support. (4pm - 9:30pm EST)
- 988lifeline // A US only Crisis hotline with phone call, text and web chat support. Dedicated staff for LGBTQIA+ youth 24/7 on phone service, 3pm to 2am EST for text and web chat.