Time for the poop knife

Need one of those tools for measuring spaghetti portions attached

Gotta plan accordingly, or carry a poop knife.

The real inconvenience is having to convert the olde world measurements to modern ones anyone would understand.

The arbitrary capitalisation of “Poops” and “Time” bothers me immensely.

Brought to you by big poop knife

Sir. Sir. Sir! Your poop is too big. Please take it with you. Sorry for the inconvenience.

That's funny... until I actually think about a 2.5in diameter turd... then I'm horrified.

Just hang a poop knife. Problem solved.

Whoever is making those poops, I feel so sorry for your tattered asshole.

That's bigger than a Coke can.

When ya forget the tape measure outside of the bathroom 😔

Time to squeeze them sphincter muscles to extrude a 4 inch long, 2.25 in diameter turd.

Here in Australia no one has "poop knives". American plumbing is a sad joke. Most Aussies don't even own a plunger.

I poop in metric so this doesn't apply to me.

I live in Japan and you can flush a pair of work boots down these toilets.

That's the size of a standard UK beer can.

What fucking animals are using that poor toilet?

Damn. Where's lemmy shitpost when you need it

What should be the lemmy equivalent of the poop knife? A shit blade? A defecation spatula? A dung spoon?

How many courics is that?

Don't tell me how to live my life

Ah crap, my poop is 2 and 5/8 inches in diameter and 6 and 1/8 inches long.

Okay, so I gotta pinch it off twice then?

Now we all know where Goatse poops