This made me realize, talking to people is like forcefully inserting you thoughts into their brain without their consent. People should just stop talking in general IMO.
this post was submitted on 18 Sep 2023
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Hello
Username absolutely does not check out.
Maybe, but our heads don't need all that space to themselves. Room for 1.25
I also dislike the “hey how are you?”. I understand they want to be friendly, but it only adds another step in the conversational exchange.
“Hey how are you?”
“I’m fine. You?”
“All good”
“Cool”
“[the actual request]”
I think it's fine, if done with the nohello approach:
Hey , how are you/had a nice weekend? I could use some help with ticket #12345 as I need to do ... and don't know how to do ....
But otherwise - yeah, you're now right at the end of my to do list.
That's the way it should be done
56k noises
Same here too, so I just cut to the chase as soon as I answer.
"I'm doing fine, how can I help?"
People actually do this!?
Yeah, I thinks it's partly a cultural thing. I've seen more indian colleagues do this than anyone else.
It's definitely more common with my Indian colleagues.
Answers "yes" and does not elaborate further
I’ve dealt with a few of those at work. Super annoying and just wastes everybody’s time.
Oh, they do..
Hey, are you there?
Hello
You there?
That instantly triggers a delay till after the top of the hour for me.
My boss does this all the time. It's incredibly annoying.
"Hi, can I ask a question?"
No, don't ask to ask a question.
Somebody message me something along those lines a few weeks ago.
Them: Them can I as a question?
Me: If you must
Anyway, they complained to HR and they had a word with me. Stupid people. If you're going to be an international company and put your IT department in the UK, prepare for snark.
Well, I usually take my time to reply. It's not my fault, when people then need to wait until they cut to the chase. That doesn't bother me. It's their problem.
I have done this before.
"Hi chunkystyles, good afternoon."
Sometimes I'll wait for a few minutes to see if they follow up and then respond. Sometimes I just don't respond until they cut to the chase if it's not someone I talk to regularly.
Minutes? It happens that I don't respond for hours or sometimes even days. (Depending on how close we are.) :D
There’s also https://onlyhello.net/
And I think I recalled “hello considered harmful” and meta stuff like “considered harmful considered harmful”. Or were those on intranet?
Hello...
This is a hello message.
Feel Helloed
Life is easier if you don't get worked up about this sort of thing.
When people at work have this as their status I just randomly say hello to them. When they get mad I tell them I just I wanted to say hi.
Last week:
"Hi Neocamel, it's Tom from work."
~no follow-up message~
Me, 15 minutes later: "Hi!"
The end.
Um, hello? What's with no hello?