this post was submitted on 11 Sep 2023
56 points (88.9% liked)

shitposting

1511 readers
50 users here now

For the dankest of all memes

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 
top 39 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I'm pretty sure I can take Kieth Richards in a fight.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

He’s like a cockroach, he’ll survive nearly anything except for bodily harm. I’m genuinely amazed that he’s still alive, good for him

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Really lucked out on real raptors being nothing like the ones in Jurassic Park

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago

Achillobator💀

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

You ever fight an extremely angry feral cat? I feel like even tiny raptors could easily hospitalize a regular person if you don't get lucky.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago (1 children)

The microraptor weighed around a kg, so I'd swat it in my panicked flailing and feel like shit afterwards.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

Ever had to fight a very angry chicken?

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I live 800 kilometres from the nearest coast, I DARE this plesiosaurus to come and get me

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (2 children)

It's not a dinosaur, though.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Ok wow you learn something new every day. Taxonomy is weird

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

It's fairly simple with dinosaurs, imo. If it flies or swims - it's not a dinosaur. So plesiosaurs, mosasaurs, ichthyosaurs are not dinos. Se goes for pterosaurs. It's terrestrial animals where it gets difficult

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

what about animals like archaeopteryx, that could fly, or spinosaurus that had adaptations for swimming?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Rule of thumb, it's not perfect. Plus AFAIK archaeopteryx was more of a glider, rather than a dedicated flyer (the way pterodactyl was). You can also tell bird-like theropods from pterosaurs by the legs - birds have long-ish legs, while pterosaurs have short-ish legs (like bats).

As for the spinosaurs, while a swimmer (it's hard to keep track, poor sod is getting retconned every other day) it was not an open sea kind of swimmer - just compare spinosaur's limbs to that of a mosasaur

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

Most people consider and refer to everything bofore Ice age as dinosaurs, so not weird.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago

Deinocheirus - even though it's a herbivore, I'm still pretty fucked.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Megaladon.

On land? I can OHKO that big fish.

In the water? I’m fucked.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Not technically, but it was a prehistoric animal, which makes it a "dinosaur" in my eyes. Also, does it really matter?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

It matters if you're a paleontologist or just a bore (like me). Gotta be pedantic about some things, otherwise people might think dolphins are fish because they live in the ocean. No offense meant, comrade

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

True, but this is hardly a college lecture, so for the fun of the game I felt like my answer was "close enough". I feel like it definitely makes sense to be pedantic in most places, but a discussion of favorite dinosaurs feels a but much.

Also dinosaur has become more of a colloquial term over the years as well, which has bent its popular definition to simply include many prehistoric non-mammal animals. However you are right in the paleontological definition.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

Fighting barney.. No! No!!

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

A real Dilophosaurus would annihilate me, that thing was apparently a very active hunter & as big as a tiger.

I would probably forfeit just to pet a Psittacosaurus.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

DILFosaurus

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Probably spinosaurus. I have no weapons and their weapon is their teeth, I'd be dead in less than five seconds.

My younger self loved the triceratops. Similar results, only that the triceratops was vegetarian, so I must really deserve it if it kills me.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)

A lot of large herbivores are more aggressive than carnivores, especially if they are a herd animal

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

Therizinosaurus moment

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I always liked the Mamenchisaurus. No way on Earth I could even come close to killing it. Also kinda unrelated but I heard that some Dinosaurs may have had feathers, how do yall feel about that?

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago

some Dinosaurs may have had feathers,

Imagine this, but five meters long

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

sinosauropteryx. i could definitely win, but i would refuse to hurt them

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

Diplodocus. Can I just, ya know, run away?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

As long as the compsognathus isn't horse-sized, I'm good.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

They were a bit bigger than in Jurassic Park, but just a bit, so 1vs1 them is easy.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Ankylosaurus was a herbivore so it wouldn’t eat me but it was also heavily armoured with a giant club of a tail so realistically it would either ignore my presence as I don’t pose much of a threat or it’d clobber me to death.

Tyrannosaurus? I’m screwed. They’re the top predator, amazing eyesight (contrary to the movies), incredibly fast (I think they can run up to 30km/h), has the strongest bite force of any animal that has ever lived, I don’t even know why I’m bothering to list all these traits since everyone knows a T-Rex could fuck you up no matter what.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

T-Rex had vision based on movement in Jurassic Park because of frog DNA and yeah, just one bite and it's done.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Iguanodon, I'll definitely get killed by their sharp thumbs

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago
[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Are we counting birds? That chicken is done for run them hands 😤

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

No, with a possible exceptioin of cassowary

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

What about Emus, Emus won a war