I dont have bipolar so take my little anecdote with a grain of salt. I do have severe adhd though (not the same i know) when I mess up either due to forgetting meds or giving into an impulse, I make sure to tell myself that it's a simple mistake. It hasn't ruined my progress or what I've done, it's simply a minor bump in the road that I try to use as a learning experience. Maybe what you did was the right idea for the time but didn't have as good a timing as you thought or didn't work quite as planned and you can keep that in mind for the next time?
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You did nothing wrong, it’s totally understandable that you stopped taking your meds after having bad side effects. I take meds for other reasons but I know how you kind of forget how bad your symptoms are if you take meds for a while. I stopped taking mine at times and they were good reminders for why I shouldn’t do that.
It’s good that you’re seeing your psychiatrist. He’s there to help you, not to hear how good you’re doing.
Your meds having side effects is not your fault, you’re doing the right things and I wish you well <3
We have to deal with so much more than a normal person, it is OK to slip a little, specially on your situation