this post was submitted on 02 Jan 2025
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[–] [email protected] 132 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago) (2 children)

Unfortunately due to other matters I don’t have the bandwidth today.

Let’s schedule a follow-up to discuss for a later date so I can give this the focus it warrants.

[–] [email protected] 27 points 5 days ago

This is the one. Polite and professional, and also acknowledges the importance of the other person's viewpoint.

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[–] [email protected] 87 points 6 days ago (1 children)

The coffee hasn't kicked in yet.

Bonus round: you don't drink coffee.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 6 days ago

I just need a quick bump and I'll be back in action

[–] [email protected] 76 points 6 days ago

This is why I love working in a blue collar field. Who needs professionalism. "Sorry boss, brain's fucked today. Explain it at me like I'm an apprentice."

[–] [email protected] 58 points 5 days ago (1 children)

What’s the priority on this? I’ve been a little scattered today.

Bear with me, I’ve been running around all day, and I need to catch up and refocus.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 5 days ago

I like the first sentence as a standalone reply.

[–] [email protected] 24 points 5 days ago (1 children)

I'm sorry. My brain is slow today and this needs to be done while I am fresh. We can go over it tomorrow.

I am too burnt out today.

I can't focus on that right now.

I am not functional enough for that.

I don't even make shit up and I am done with corpo speak. If they can't accept that, then they can get over it. We can discuss this like humans. If I can get you started, great, but if you want this done right, you will wait.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 5 days ago (1 children)

All of those make the person seem incapable or otherwise unable to fulfill their daily activities/roles. I dunno I think this wouldn't be great to say unless maybe you were legitimately sick. There are times you just gotta suck it up and get er done.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Not when you are a developer trying to write code for a critical part of the system. Sucking it up isn't going to make it magically happen and it will be a mess.

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[–] [email protected] 43 points 6 days ago (2 children)

I like to explore all the angles before committing to a decision

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[–] [email protected] 32 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago)
[–] [email protected] 34 points 6 days ago (2 children)

"Sorry, I haven't had my coffee yet."

[–] [email protected] 12 points 6 days ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 31 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) (1 children)

In the morning, it's "I'm not fully caffeinated, yet".

In the hour(s) leading up to lunch, it's "My blood sugar must be getting low."

In the hour(s) after lunch, it's "I've had lunch and now I feel like I need a nap."

In the hour(s) before clocking out for the day, it's "It's been a long day and my eyes / brain need a rest."

This is basically science. I just need to apply for some funding.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 days ago

To be fair, 4 PM was usually the time for a coffee break back when I worked in an office.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 5 days ago (1 children)

“Sorry, I haven’t had my ~~coffee~~ cocaine yet.”

[–] [email protected] 9 points 5 days ago

“Sorry, you don't pay me enough for ~~coffee~~ cocaine yet.”

[–] [email protected] 30 points 5 days ago (1 children)

"Sorry, I don't function well on Mondays"

"But today is Wednesday"

"I call it third Monday"

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 days ago

And tomorrow is before-friday.

[–] [email protected] 24 points 6 days ago (2 children)

Sorry, I have a case of the Mondays!

[–] [email protected] 15 points 6 days ago (1 children)

I believe you get your ass kicked for saying something like that

[–] [email protected] 7 points 6 days ago

Not if you say it on a Thursday. With a gallon of coffee in hand.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 6 days ago

"let's pencil in a session about that tomorrow morning"

[–] [email protected] 20 points 6 days ago

"Just back from annual leave and trying to get upto speed" or "just had the closing meeting on an old project. Once I'm fully read in on this I will be able to take it on"

[–] [email protected] 18 points 6 days ago (1 children)

"Co-pilot, make up an excuse for me."

I am unavoidably detained due to furious diarrhea

[–] [email protected] 3 points 5 days ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 17 points 6 days ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 7 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago)

(I just recreated the original because that one is jpegged to hell and back. I used draw.io (used the original image as background), then exported as SVG, jammed it through SVGOMG, and then let ChatGPT do one last optimization because the font stuff was a bit too much, removed the whitespace and comments - boom: 700kb SVG)

[–] [email protected] 13 points 5 days ago

Sorry, I have exceeded my bandwidth for the day.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 5 days ago (5 children)

Then there's me. Who's not smart AND my brain is fried. AMA

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 days ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 4 points 4 days ago

"Thank you for your patience"

[–] [email protected] 12 points 5 days ago

I find the blank, abyssal stare of one desperately trying to piece reality back together long enough to hold conversation, sends a pretty clear message

[–] [email protected] 7 points 5 days ago

I work smarter not harder

[–] [email protected] 10 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago)

I promise I'm smart my brain is just sautéed.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 6 days ago

We need some internal discussion on this. (When talking to an external party or another department)

[–] [email protected] 7 points 5 days ago (1 children)

I can assure you of my intellectual capacity but there is a severe incompatibility with cognitive functions on this day.

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[–] [email protected] 9 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago)

"Apologies, X AM/PM is too early in the morning for my brain"

It becomes more of a joke the later it is in the day.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 6 days ago

Think no. Brain not good.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 6 days ago (1 children)

"My apologies, I seem to have contracted an acute case of skibidi brainrot."

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 5 days ago

When I'm in that situation, my go-to is "I don't think I can do that today, but I think we should definitely look into that sometime"

[–] [email protected] 5 points 5 days ago

I've seen

I am at capacity

And

My head is full

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