this post was submitted on 28 Nov 2024
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Hey all, sincerely hope you're well.

Many of our American posters are gathering together with family and friends today. They're likely to hear plenty of awful takes from their liberals. Unscratched, freshly scratched, or pre-scratched chuds alike, there are sure to be brainworms all around the table and openly airing their unhinged grievances. Please feel free to share their awful takes here. This thread is open for supporting one another, venting, laughing at bad family takes (both stale and bespoke).

This thread is intended to be a supportive space to bring the community together. Please be kind to one another. As always, discussion of struggle sessions or attempts to relitigate them will not be permitted.

Have fun and keep cozy! comfy

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[–] [email protected] 59 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

My spouse's mom brought edibles to thanksgiving for us to take before having to interact with the rest of the family, and boy howdy did I underestimate her tolerance for weed. I took a quarter of one of her supergummies and I'm melting

[–] [email protected] 26 points 3 weeks ago

Oh shit, how many mg?

[–] [email protected] 58 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (3 children)

This year is the third year where my extended family has completely severed ties with me in regards to family events/holidays.

The reason hasn't been given to me directly, but based on what my father has told me it's probably because I'm non-binary or that I'm "scary" to all my evangelical family because I work out, I wear thick eyeliner and I have bracelets with spikes. Like I'm clearly some type of queer leftist punk by demeanor and appearance and that's simply who I am and have been for a long time. My grandmother died of covid in 2021, days before the vaccine was commercially available. She was the matriarch of the whole extended family and she loved me dearly. No one would dare speak against her in regards to me being present. I was tolerated so long as meemaw would shoot them a dirty look or brandish her wooden spoon if someone started speaking ill of me. My meemaw was an absolute real one, grew up in poverty in the 1930s, daughter of a community pastor, and overall the sweetest person I've ever known. She had such an immense love inside of her. She practically raised me too, I got my first lessons from her on why racism is evil and how you should treat people with kindness and appreciation.

Now that she's gone the matriarch and planner seems to be my deranged fundamentalist aunt. At one point my aunt was the principal of my middle school where she was known by the students as "lady Hitler." She would frequently make disparaging remakes about the Latino students and once made a morning announcement that all Christians should be wary of secret Muslims sneaking into America. This was in the early 00s so she never got fired for blatant discrimination like that, instead she ended up superintendent of the whole district a few years later.

Yeah so if my aunt is in charge of extended family plans, I'm probably never going again. My parents, bless them, actually didn't attend thanksgiving last year or this one because they figured out I was deliberately excluded. Apparently there was an incident where my uncle tried shooting the shit with his brother (my dad) in 2022 about me. Uncle was saying something to the effect of "this is a lot nicer without that commie (slur) isn't it?" He said this thinking my dad would go along with it, but it ended up turning into shouting. Dad actually defended me, said I was smarter and more kind than anyone at the whole table. I'm just some dumb goofus, but it touched me to hear my dad defended me like that from all the bullies in my family.

My parents are actually super chill with me, despite being a little nuts and racist themselves, they're just standard American type of deranged, not the red pill maga christian fascist type of American. So my parents don't tolerate their kids being called slurs or disparaged by family, thankfully.

Anyway. I'm thankful that I'm healthy and I have two lovely cats. I only have one human friend, but she's very dear to me. And you're all my comrades and you've always been super nice to me. Thank you

[–] [email protected] 35 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Dad actually defended me, said I was smarter and more kind than anyone at the whole table.

don't need to meet your family to be utterly confident that your father is correct ❤️ I'm really glad to know your parents stick up for you, you deserve it.

[–] [email protected] 23 points 3 weeks ago

Thank you, you're very sweet catgirl-heart

[–] [email protected] 29 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Your grandma sounds like she was a great lady, I'm sure she was very proud of you

[–] [email protected] 23 points 3 weeks ago

Thank you, I hope so.

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[–] [email protected] 56 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

Getting deadnamed: the holiday

[–] [email protected] 53 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)

Love to get ruthlessly dogpiled for being the only one to make thanksgiving political when I tell someone that “No, actually Europe is not an authoritarian country for having different driving tests than the United States”

Aaaaaawaaaaaaaaaqqqqqaaaaaaaaaaaa

[–] [email protected] 38 points 3 weeks ago

Actually, the US is fascist for using easy driving tests to deputise its citizens so they can kill protestors and children with SUVs.

[–] [email protected] 33 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Granted this was Japan and not Europe, but I remember for years people telling me that the test was impossible and that everyone fails twice and that it was actually a scam for the Japanese driving school to get money.

Passed it on my first try. Turns out most Americans just suck at driving.

[–] [email protected] 23 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

I failed my driving exam, in the U.S., twice, but it was for total fucking bullshit. One failure she claimed I was speeding. No, I was watching my speedometer, I never went over 35. The second failure it was LIGHTLY RAINING, like, imagine the lightest fucking rain imaginable. I got failed for not turning my windshield wipers on automatic.... I was just manually operating them as needed. Because it was barely fucking raining. But I got this "blah blah blah state law when it's raining you gotta turn on the wipers" bullshit. Fuck those assholes, wasting my fucking time on absolute nonsense.

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[–] [email protected] 47 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

The amount of “you need to beat the shit out of kids” I’ve heard this trip lol. And conservatives wonder why they get cut off lol

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[–] [email protected] 46 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Only had one nword this thanksgiving but thats a new record low.

[–] [email protected] 38 points 3 weeks ago

The arc of history bends towards not saying the nword.

[–] [email protected] 45 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (3 children)

It's been a year since I spoke to my family, and this is the first thanksgiving I'm missing. I can't do it anymore. I'm tired of never having my thoughts and feelings taken seriously, either because I'm a child and therefore lesser than my parents, or because I'm a communist. They begged me to be a libertarian instead a couple years ago, lmao (they're liberals, or at least they think they are). The final straw was Palestine. Everyone called me antisemitic last Thanksgiving, and I'm not dealing with that again.

The distance has let me reflect on how my parents raised me. Although they never hit me, there were a few fucked-up situations that with hindsight prove they never respected me. They think they love me, but they don't. They love the concept of me as a relatively successful son, and familial peace.

It would be nice to have a family, but I'm so exhausted by it. I've never really had a good relationship with my family, so I don't even know what it would look like if I forgave them and they magically changed how they speak to me. I hope they get over their racism and transphobia, but I can't try to change them anymore

I already had a wonderful friendsgiving with a bunch of lovely people, and I'm going to my friend's family's Thanksgiving tonight. She's lost family in Gaza and the West Bank this year.

[–] [email protected] 23 points 3 weeks ago

Im glad you arent being subjected to that this year. Even if it isnt 100% easy you deserve your peace to be respected. You can be a successful son in ways that they dont even understand, contributing to the well being of others rather then leeching off of them

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[–] [email protected] 43 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

My family is at least liberal so it's not that bad. Actually, my uncle called the Senate a "reactionary institution" out of nowhere. waow-based

Someone in my family told me he did an environmentalist adventure-time at one point, so he's a pretty cool guy.

[–] [email protected] 42 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (1 children)

"I hope I can avoid chuds on Thanksgiving."

monkey's paw curls and im surrounded by white PMC liberals.

Wish me luck chat, into the lion's den I go. I'll try not to fedpost IRL to maintain Hexbear's opsec.

Edit: Maine.

[–] [email protected] 24 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (4 children)

Reasons Kopmala lost the election:

"She's a woman. And she's black."

"Russian election interference."

"Didn't have enough time to get her campaign going."

"Trump supporters infiltrated her campaign and sabotaged it with overspending."

"She didn't know what her staff was doing and how they were misappropriating campaign funds."

"Articles about her low polling numbers is fake news."

"Something is off and I can't put my finger on it."

Not mentioned? Palestine. Inflation. Outflanking Republicans from the right. Police brutality. College funding. Healthcare reform.

Really activates the almonds on Main Street.

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[–] [email protected] 40 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 39 points 3 weeks ago (4 children)

my family is cool and i don't have conservatives in my relations big-cool

[–] [email protected] 26 points 3 weeks ago

Just a bunch of libs here 😤

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[–] [email protected] 37 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

Can’t take this shit anymore dog. Just going about my life, seeing the same old traditionalist bullshit and family values pervasive notions that are fucking cancer cells. The same garbage that causes generational trauma, treating your fucking kids like livestock and comparing their “beauty” and “purity” seems like something out of a parody of a crumbling fascist society (if it quacks like a duck)

No politics talk but this shit is oozing conservative values. A great example why I don’t give a fuck if you call yourself liberal or republican while living this Godamn life and continuing the cycle that should be dismantled

[–] [email protected] 36 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 30 points 3 weeks ago

Absolutely awful, yeah.

[–] [email protected] 36 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

I'm happy i'm not American so I only have to deal with this shit on Christmas, can't imagine living through 2 events like this in less then a month

[–] [email protected] 36 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

I learned how to deal with it in my family, thanks to the Immortal Science of Marxism-Leninism

My dialectical approach is to tell my father to shut the fuck up when he tries to talk shit about immigrants, trans people etc

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[–] [email protected] 35 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

I was kind of pressured into attending my new boss's Thanksgiving since I'm temporarily 5 hours from home. I've only known him like 3 days so I have no idea who any of these people are. So far the food is good and nobody has said any crazy shit, so better than I expected. Will update once people get drunk.

[–] [email protected] 35 points 3 weeks ago

Honestly, that's a nice gesture to invite someone into your home and share a meal with them when you've only known them for mere days. Hope it all turns out fun!

[–] [email protected] 35 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

My family is tolerable usually but my god i hate visiting my family, then visiting my gf's family, and spending 8 hours combined in doing so. I have enough conversation in me for like 20 minutes

thank god it's over... until christmas

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[–] [email protected] 35 points 3 weeks ago (7 children)

Thanksgiving for me is really just a chance to have dinner and spend time with my in laws. They're in their 70s and a lot of fun. They showed me their weed plant they've been growing and I brought them some sparkling weed water I got in Chicago.

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[–] [email protected] 32 points 3 weeks ago

The uncle-in-law that hosts thanksgiving has a toddler now, which means the TV is on youtube kids autoplay rather than 24/7 newsmax/fox that it used to be.

As usual, during grace, he made sure to ask god to help trump save our country and turn it back into a christian nation. But overall these holidays have featured far less political talk then they did a few years ago so im thankful for that.

[–] [email protected] 32 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (9 children)

probably gonna post this in the general too because I think it's funny/awful/not-strictly-Thanksgiving enough to be of general interest, but wanted to specifically share with those of you also suffering with truly maddening family, please enjoy these photographic highlights:

flag pic detailsI tried so hard to get a better picture of the _absolutely horrifying _ flag, but the wind was not cooperating and I was attracting attention, so I had to give up. I thought I would easily find an image of it myself, but I can't. here's a collage to help you imagine: half USA, half "Israel," and there was some weird flaming-starry lion thing in the center, partially super-imposed over the Star of David

vaguely looked like amerikkka at first glance and for a moment I was very excited they were accidentally cool

it honestly reads as "Evangelical Americans for Genocide" and makes me deeply ashamed of my family 😞

anyway, fuck Thanksgiving, be grateful every day and TAKE PILLS^[vitamins – that message was genuinely about vitamins 🤦😂 that place is a trip]

[–] [email protected] 22 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

Woah your relatives are like next level chuds lol. I thought I had some bad ones, but there's enough liberals in the family that the chud ones usually don't speak up about politics. We'll see what happens when they're a couple beers in, but still... the flag pole and shit? That's a whole other level. I'm so sorry lol.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 3 weeks ago

Having a flag pole in your yard is already a fucking weird ass thing chuds do, but that lion flag is something else.

amerikkkaidf-cool🦁aaaa

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[–] [email protected] 31 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (7 children)

i passed out on the toilet at like 5 AM today. i thought i was just going to have diarrhea, but suddenly my lower stomach/intestines started hurting a lot, and i got really lightheaded. i knew i was about to pass out and was trying to breathe. next thing i knew i was waking up on the bathroom floor between my toilet and bathtub, my head basically inside the bucket we keep the plunger and toilet brush in. at first i was confused, i thought i was asleep in my bed, but i immediately panicked and noticed i was on the filthy bathroom floor. i swear i could hear indistinct voices as i came too as well. i don't know how long i was out, a few minutes at most and probably less than that. i had a bit of a panic attack when i got up, i still felt lightheaded, i needed a shower after being face-first in the plunger bucket, and my stomach still hurt very badly and i felt like i had to defecate in the worst way. but since i was lightheaded i went to lie down on the floor in another room, trying to text my dad and my roommate who i had just taken to work earlier at like 4 AM with stiff tingling hands i could barely move. my dad didn't respond, still asleep (and didn't even say anything until much later in the day), but my roommate responded at work at least and my brother was willing to drive me to a hospital which i declined because i finally had the grossest weird smelling (like ammonia or cat poo) diarrhea ever and my stomach stopped hurting. no blood or anything came out that i noticed so i'm confused as to what even happened in a medical sense. i decided to stay home from a thanksgiving thing my brother had planned at the house he just moved into to keep things safe. i appreciate him (he was quicker to respond to calls for aid than my dad who is usually pretty cool) but i also don't know any of the people he moved in with, and the way i felt after i regained consciousness reminded me of ways i've felt in other socially taxing situations (stiff, tingling hands and face), so i didn't want to stress the same biological systems if its at all related. i had been reading 'the will to change' and having a bit of a i'm-a--broken-man-in-a-doomed-world kind of existential crisis, it kind of triggered me and reminded me of a lot of the abuse i suffered as a child, so maybe it was some kind of trauma psychosomatic thing. not a criticism of the book its just a little to real for my addled traumatized mind.

also, before any of this happened, while i was awake in bed, i had the weirdest psuedo-dream (like an intense involuntary waking daydream, my eyes rolled back into my head but i wasn't asleep) about some green-eyed (solid/glowing green like green lantern or something) alien with defined brow ridges and grey skin (looked kind of like a Protoss) and either a red mouthless facepart (like DBZ cell's original form with its mouth closed) or a mask, on its mouth, and wearing white and gold robes, examining me as i kneeled before it in either chains or some kind of collar. it or an associate moved a rod or a staff and it forced my body (i was watching this dream in 3rd person from some other perspective) to move, turning my head to the left and exposing my neck. the tall grey skinned green eyed alien stared and did something to my neck, maybe with a wand or something, and i started feeling weird mentally. i had been initially terrified of this alien but suddenly i reached out as if i trusted it, and then a large white/gold humanoid dragon's (a character the preexists in my mental library of archetypes, i have seen it before in other similar psuedo-dream/hallucinations) foot appeared at the edge of my disembodied view of the scene, implying that the rest of its huge body encased in some kind of translucent sphere had been 'summoned' by this manipulation of my body. then, i saw the grey skinned green eyed alien with its hands in my head, which looked impossibly and bloodlessly 'opened up' with rectangular panels removed and floating nearby, as if it was moving objects around inside my skull, or doing some kind of maintenance or manipulation. this alien was terrifying to me at first but it felt more like a doctor in this scene. for some reason it felt to me like this dream was related to the voices i heard wile i regained consciousness later.

in conclusion, any aliens or sorcerers on here or anywhere else wishing my demise because of my cringe posting are going to have to try harder, cuz i lived this time. shoutout to the handful of people that upvote even my most deranged posts for some reason.

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[–] [email protected] 28 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)

Solidarity to all comrades dealing with this today. I know nothing about thanksgiving outside movies and tried to make pumpkin pie once as a non-usaian, but hated it.

Care-Comrade

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[–] [email protected] 28 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (3 children)

Lost a tire with no spare in the middle of nowhere on a holiday. Currently waiting on three different rideshares hoping for one to pop to take me home so I can deal with this tomorrow since there's no tow trucks available.

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[–] [email protected] 27 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (3 children)

Some slammer post for you nerds on this time cw: suicide

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[–] [email protected] 25 points 3 weeks ago

Happy genocide day folks, mines been better than usual actually. I think it is the drinking

[–] [email protected] 24 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

Got wine spilled on my favorite tee, angery

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[–] [email protected] 23 points 3 weeks ago

Family arrives soon

[–] [email protected] 23 points 3 weeks ago

My cool cousin decided she's not celebrating Thanksgiving this year so we got my very MSNBC pilled aunt by herself.

I don't talk politics to any of these people, though, but their worldview is just boring and petty.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)
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[–] [email protected] 22 points 3 weeks ago (4 children)

CW: meat, dairy

I live far from family and have been so for probably 15 years now. used to do a Friendsgiving type of thing for years with others, but we've scattered and I just moved to a new place.

it's kinda nice having a long weekend where everything is closed and I am somewhat compelled to make something out of the ordinary for myself to enjoy. also went to the doc for a routine checking and I'm down like 15% of body weight in the last 6 months, my blood/metabolic tests all came back optimal, so I figured a holiday treat meal would be funny.

this year I made elite tier fried chicken and pancakes. was gonna do waffles instead of pancakes, but my waffle apparatus is MIA. local buttermilk, mustard powder, and hot sauce based brine (hot sauce was this stuff a friend of mine brought back from Nicaragua) and fresh ground (ground by me 20 minutes before I'm putting batter on the skillet) spelt pancakes served with syrup from a friend's taps.

since it's just for me, it was all small portions (couple thighs, 5 small pancakes) so not a lot of volume of food was being made, but the same number of steps. 15+ hour brine. double dredge. for the first 75% of the process, I was like "what the fuck am I doing, what a colossal waste of effort", so many dirty dishes but as I got to the home stretch of everything being plated hot and crispy I was like "I am a genius" lol.

I've spent the rest of the day chilling with the cat on the couch and watching slop.

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[–] [email protected] 22 points 3 weeks ago

I'm trying to get my dad to watch Dune but I think I might make a post detailing some for what I heard. Went pretty much the whole day without any politics talk until my cousin's loveable oaf of a husband started saying some shit about Trump and got immediately ganged up on by almost my whole family. I had to stop watching football to go to the other room and bail his ass out lol. Will probably make a post later with details, but the summary was that the Trump voters weren't even actually that excited about Trump and don't actually believe he's going to fix anything. A couple conservatives talked about how we need to stop being involved in foreign wars and actually included Israel/Gaza in that, which was interesting.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)

Unlike y'all, we gotten over Thanksgiving real quick

kkkanada

That being said, what an inconvenient political holiday placement for y'all down South

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