NEVER BEEN FUCKING DONE BEFORE (technically never before because this bazinga train weighs down the train with on board batteries) (hexbear.net)

submitted 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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Christ, even the lettering on the side... younger me from the 90s would be baffled to find out how sick current me could get of cyberpunkerinos aesthetics. debord-tired

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[-] [email protected] 54 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

It's just branding, because it's a shuttle service between a mainline stop in a nearby village and their Gigafactory outside Berlin.

The best part is that this train isn't made by Tesla, it's just them leasing battery trains from Siemens, and they don't even operate them:

Tesla plans to switch to operating battery-electric trains from the Mireo Smart family, manufactured by Siemens, replacing diesel trains currently transporting employees to their factory near Berlin.

[...]

The trains will be leased from the newly established leasing company, Smart Train Lease, founded by Siemens in early 2024. The operation of the trains will continue to be managed by the passenger transport operator Niederbarnimer Eisenbahn (NEB).

Source: https://www.railway.supply/en/tesla-is-transitioning-to-environmentally-friendly-trains/

[-] [email protected] 6 points 11 months ago

According to German Natopedia it's a shuttle that Tesla pays for and is allowed to operate only until the regular train station is moved by a few hundred meters closer to the factory (in 2026). So I guess in this case it absolutely makes sense to lease a battery powered train for the trainsition period.

But yeah, the reporting is pure brain worms for an entirely mundane regional public transport process.

[-] [email protected] 1 points 11 months ago

I didn't know that. That makes this train a little less absurd, at least.

[-] [email protected] 5 points 11 months ago

They're not even putting Tesla-brand batteries in the train which could kind of make sense? Lol

[-] [email protected] 49 points 11 months ago

It's a train ffs what is the point of using fucking batteries that will run out you can just run electricity through the track jfc

[-] [email protected] 31 points 11 months ago

Like so many things my-hero he said it should be that way and anyone in a position to disagree didn't want to get fired.

[-] [email protected] 4 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

I think it is the same liberal self-reliance brainworms that makes them hate trains in the first place where having to rely on external resources you share with others is considered bad by definition. Riding a car is better than riding a train that you share with others and where you depend on others. Riding a self-powered battery train is better than riding one that is dependent on an external power source that is shared with other trains.

It's pure ideology.

[-] [email protected] 37 points 11 months ago

God I hate this style of tech reporting that's just advertising in disguise

[-] [email protected] 28 points 11 months ago

I gave up on TIME magazine and related rags decades ago because they became advertising for techbros, and not just the designated ads.

"WILL THIS BABY LIVE FOREVER?!" bazinga hype on the covers, even.

[-] [email protected] 28 points 11 months ago

"What if electric train, but nowhere near as efficient, costs more to produce, can catch fire and burn for two weeks straight, and has my brand's trademark jank?"

libbing-out "EPICALLY MEMED, MY MEME LORD!"

[-] [email protected] 27 points 11 months ago

just run a wire jfc

[-] [email protected] 15 points 11 months ago

King Bazinga didn't think of that, and if anyone suggested that, they'd have gotten fired.

[-] [email protected] 15 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

Giga Train

That's false advertising for a perfectly normal-sized train.

Mind blowing passenger capacity

Looks like it has about the same passenger capacity as any other train. Is this the bazinga crowd discovering how effective trains are?

Battery powered

Just build catenaries! It's the superior technology. We figured that out more than a century ago.

[-] [email protected] 11 points 11 months ago

It's pretty sad that wow-cool-robot cyberpunkerino became just an aesthetic, even if it's admittedly a good one. Guess it's not that surprising considering William Gibson is a massive lib.

[-] [email protected] 9 points 11 months ago

If public non(directly)porn treat printer forums and communities are any indication, the main purpose of cyberpunkerino aesthetics is infinite waifus that get a special chud-approved waiver for unnatural hair colors.

[-] [email protected] 11 points 11 months ago

The irony of Musk co-opting cyberpunkerino is funny though, because he doesn't even realize he's the Tessier-Ashpool.

[-] [email protected] 9 points 11 months ago

He used to post JC Denton memes while being a worse Bob Page.

this post was submitted on 10 Sep 2024

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