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I feel the same way about children.

Same. I like/tolerate well-trained dogs, but those are basically nonexistent these days.

Where I live, dog culture is really strong. People here violate leash laws all the time. When you gently but firmly raise a knee to keep a big jumping dog off your chest, the owner acts like you just did a heinous crime. If you complain about not wanting to be jumped on/knocked over by a giant dog that weighs more than you do, you'll be told to seek therapy for your phobia.

Bad dog owners have ruined dogs for me. Training is considered taboo, something close to animal abuse. Which boggles the mind, because the psychology of dogs is such that they need training and maintenance discipline to be well-adjusted. IMO, not training your dog is animal abuse. But here we are, with untrained dogs running around bowling people over and sticking their tongues in strangers' mouths.

I like dogs in general, grew up with a bunch. My spouse's family always had cats though. After a few years of living with cats vs dogs, cats take the win easy for me for general ease of living.

No needing walks, liter box is easy to scoop, they spend most of the day sleeping and will come by to play or get pet for a few minutes, then move on lol.

Two things though:

1. Some of this is culturally American. In other countries, dogs are not given the same free reign of the house as here.

2. I'm probs gunna get a lot of flack for this... A majority of people have horribly trained dogs. In my experience, most folks consider their dog a "good" dog if it has a good mood, that's all. Doesn't matter that it doesn't listen to commands, doesn't matter that it jumps all over people slobbering and barking. Doesn't matter that it is always butting into meals and begging.

Can't tell you how many times I've had a dog jump all over me, licking my face and getting stinking drool all over my clothes only for the owner to say, "oh sorry haha, he/she just loves people!"

If your dog won't stop barking the moment you tell it to, it's a badly trained dog. If your dog jumps up on people when they enter your home, your dog is badly trained. If your dog constantly comes over to the table while people are eating and whines, badly trained.

And it pisses me off that when this behavior happens, the owners either don't care, or get angry at the dog and do something asinine like lock it in another room alone.

I like dogs! I still want one when my spouse and I have property. I don't care if your dog gets to lay on the couches and roam the house freely, that's fine, but it has to act civilized like any other member of the family. Yes it's possible BTW, any professionally trained service dogs will behave like this and more.

Your post made me smile. Great example of the difference of allowing down votes or not. Can you imaging the down votes this would have gotten on that other service.

Frankly I agree. Dogs are needy. I guess a lot of people like that. Not me. For me that is highly subtractive not additive.

You don’t have to like dogs.

You do have to make that clear to some people. Put together a response, have it ready. “Please call your dog. I don’t like dogs and don’t want it near me.” And call restaurants before you go and ask if they allow dogs. And ask your friends to put their dog in another room while you visit.

I guarantee you some folks will assume you are afraid of dogs, and will try to use their dog to cure your “fear.” You will have to be firm that you are not afraid of them, you don’t like them.

I'm kinda there with you. My cousin has two chocolate labs and every time I'm at their house I hear their name combined with the word "stop it!" Or "get down" or some other variant every 5 minutes or so. I'm sorry, dogs are just inferior cats. Cats are pet perfection.

“they’re friendly!”

Oh god, I've had that same experience, but while walking my rescue who was deathly afraid of everything. A big dog comes up to us unleashed and I tell the owners to please call back your dog. They do, but it does nothing. My dog almost pulled out of her harness she was so afraid.

Some people shouldn't have dogs, and unfortunately, that's most people. I'm sorry you have to deal with dogs with shitty owners. It's not the dogs fault though, and can usually be re-trained so that they can take part in polite society, unlike their troglodyte owners.

Used to work at a large tech company (think FAANG). It was advertised as a very dog-friendly place, so people would bring in their dogs, even if they weren't behaved well. There was an "incident" involving one of my coworkers. (That is a nice way of saying another employee's poorly trained dog bit them.)

Just another reason WFH was so much better.

Sounds like you're painting all dogs with a brush dipped in your experiences. I can completely understand that. I also don't like those situations. They stress me out and make for an uncomfortable visit. I've had my backpack destroyed by a Frenchie, slobber on my clothes from a great Dane, conversations interrupted by a Yorkie, and staffie that just made me nervous.

At the same time, I grew up with a Shiba Inu, and I now have my own Shiba. He's quiet, never begs, requires very little of me, and lays down quietly when guests are over. He loves people and is incredibly protective. It took quite a bit of training and patience, but I'm extremely proud of the good boy he's turned into.

Yes, I love my dog and I'm not expecting you to, but I am asking you to be open minded to different experiences. There are good and bad owners while there are also compatible dog breeds. If aomwone has a border collie in an apartment, it will destroy everything. Same could be said for a Pomeranian that's understimulated.

I respect your opinion and hope that you can one day see the good side of dogs and the companionship they bring into people's lives. While it may not be something in your story, for others it may be a necessary part of their day.

Sounds more like you are tired of poorly trained dogs and their incompetent owners. Unfortunatly there are many of the latter.

I like dogs. I just keep a healthy distance. I've been bitten by too many "good boys" to really care for raising my own.

Most people don't seem to know this oddly, but in lots of parts of the world people don't really care for dogs. Wild dogs are more common outside of the first world and they can be extremely dangerous. People will often get injured by one and be afraid of dogs for the rest of their lives. I had a roommate from the middle east while I was in college and he said he did not care for dogs at all.

It is also pretty common these days for people to straight up not follow the law in regards to their dogs. Having dogs off leash in a nature area seems to be very common nowadays. My own dog gets very nervous while near an off leash dog and I basically had to stop taking him with me on hikes since they are so common. Makes me very angry.

Oh hell yes. I call it creeping "dog culture". Hard to find a brewpub that isn't overrun by them. Nobody in my town obeys leash laws. Grocery stores are the grossest.

Go to Turkey, there are almost no fkn dogs on the streets. We visited it with friends and after two or three days realized that it's coolness and calmness is because of only few dogs around. However, there are tonnes of cats there, but they don't bark.
I was quite disappointed coming back from holidays to my neighbourhood, where everybody, especially after Covid19, have stupid, barking dogs.

Also, dogs would be less stressful if their owners had any idea on how to teach and train a dog. I'm all for a mandatory dog ownership license, so that you have to proove that you have knowledge and skills for training your dog. .

@SharkEatingBreakfast finally someone who shares my thought. Dogs are awful to keep indoors. I can hear them barking through the walls. I literally only like one dog but that's because he's timid and quiet (he only barks at incomming cars). He was probably abused in the past (my cousin found him alone near the road).

Taking regular walks around my neighborhood has really soured me on dogs. Every other house has dogs barking at me from the back yard or front windows. Almost every dog that's being walked will lunge and bark at me. There are only a handful of well-behaved dogs that I enjoy seeing on my walks. Frankly, it seems like 95% of dog owners aren't doing the work to properly socialize their pets.

Hell, I can't even grill out in my backyard without getting barked at from three different directions.

I think you should direct these emotions more towards the owners than the dogs themselves.

I think you’re being a little unfair. A lot of the examples you state are not universal among dogs. And a lot of the issues could be solved with owners being more responsible. No owner should let a dog come up to you like that, that is just unacceptable. I would never allow my dog to do that unless it was clear the person wanted it. Likewise dogs should NOT be stealing food from people, that is bad behaviour and it’s on the owners who should know better and train the dog properly.

Sure, some dogs have annoying or difficult traits, but to paint all dogs in such a negative light is just not accurate. You’re perfectly entitled to be nervous around dogs, but if you reinforce that nervousness with negative connotations you will never be able to overcome it.

Are you a bit of an introvert? I ask because I am and prefer cats myself because they're just they're without begging for my attention. I understand everyone has different needs and wants though.

:(

As a dog owner, that's absolutely fair. It's not your responsibility to deal with other people's dogs.

We do bring our dog places, but they have to be 1) explicitly dog friendly (and still not just randomly in stores, and definitely not restaurants? breweries with outdoor spaces though, sure) and 2) we do things like go for big hikes or doggie play dates beforehand, so our dog is happy to just sit underneath our table or right beside us and people watch. If he ever starts getting disruptive (barking/crying, won't stay still) then we pack it up and go - that means he's not having a good time (and we're not either if he's not just chilling) and there's no reason others should have to deal with that too. Fortunately this is rare for us, but this is how the dog owner social contract should go I think.

And absolutely he can't just approach people and is never off leash outside of his specific home spaces (our home, specific family homes). Are people just bringing their dogs to your home and setting them loose or something? Like that's wild and outrageously rude, our dog never goes to someone else's private space without 110% knowledge that they're good with it, and even then he gets tons of stuff to ensure a successful visit (again, lots of activity beforehand + things like his gates, crate, toys, etc. to keep him occupied and safely away from things that could just potentially be issues).

If you're someone who just really doesn't like dogs, the only time and place our dog should ever occupy your attention at all is if you're physically in our house. Which like, he's very social and friendly, but still very much a dog, and while we'd do everything we could to make you comfortable, we'd probably just not meet you in our house most of the time.

@SharkEatingBreakfast indeed, dogs are really curious of the surroundings (happens with all the animals ofc, but dogs are some of the most obvious about it). And I know it doesn't help, but most dogs really are friendly and they do not intend to harm you or anything. If you happen to stumble upon one dog that is not, that is the fault of the owner. Also as a person who owned a dog, I can tell you that if they are threatening, you will know about it. They will signal that if you come close to their proximity, they won't stay like that. Otherwise, they do not attack you directly.

Stray dogs are a bit of a different story, in that they are also territorial, but you do not know where this territory would be and if it is in your path or not. Plus they go in packs, which makes them even more dangerous.

And yes, I understand that you might feel uncomfortable being smelled by them in public. Owners should keep them closer, but still, they are just curious. They do not do any harm or otherwise.

Owners will let their dogs walk right up to me while I'm actively backing away

Those people who do this on purpose suck indeed. I never let my dog go around places in public either. But you can try one thing: if you encounter a dog in a place where there's nowhere to move away from, and it starts smelling your hand for example, try gently petting its head (of course, make sure it doesn't show the teeth). You'll both enjoy this 😊

I feel exactly the same like you OP if you replace the word dog with child.

Perhaps I’m reading into it, but it sounds like the majority of your exposure is with someone(s) who is a poor dog owner and lets their dogs do whatever they like. Which is isn’t to invalidate your discomfort, but I wonder if you wouldn’t have a better time of things if 70%(or w/e) of your exposure to dogs wasn’t dealing with extreme misbehavior, and therefore it wouldn’t be at the forefront of your mind.

I always say: I like dogs, but I never want to live with one again.

I like dogs that get to know me over years, and small dogs. Unfortunately I get few opportunities to do so authentically (many of them I got to know as a child are deceased today), as I don’t like to be approached by random dogs because I believe they are thinking I have food.

I didn’t like the fact that my old apartment allowed dogs (I would leave the elevator whenever one showed up, seclusion and dogs don’t go well together). But I always smiled whenever I got a, relatively frequent, reply-all email from management about disciplining people whose dogs used the grass (or elevator, one time) as a toilet.

I have dogs, but I agree with some of your points, I don't like when people unleash their dogs and can't control them, however not every owner is like that.
I don't unleash my dogs at all on public spaces, I really don't like when people come close to them without my permission. Some people are like that ig.

This sounds more like you dislike badly trained dogs/inattentive owners. Dogs that are well behaved and trained don't do any of that.