this post was submitted on 18 Jul 2023
583 points (92.2% liked)

Ask Lemmy

26753 readers
1455 users here now

A Fediverse community for open-ended, thought provoking questions

Please don't post about US Politics. If you need to do this, try [email protected]


Rules: (interactive)


1) Be nice and; have funDoxxing, trolling, sealioning, racism, and toxicity are not welcomed in AskLemmy. Remember what your mother said: if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all. In addition, the site-wide Lemmy.world terms of service also apply here. Please familiarize yourself with them


2) All posts must end with a '?'This is sort of like Jeopardy. Please phrase all post titles in the form of a proper question ending with ?


3) No spamPlease do not flood the community with nonsense. Actual suspected spammers will be banned on site. No astroturfing.


4) NSFW is okay, within reasonJust remember to tag posts with either a content warning or a [NSFW] tag. Overtly sexual posts are not allowed, please direct them to either [email protected] or [email protected]. NSFW comments should be restricted to posts tagged [NSFW].


5) This is not a support community.
It is not a place for 'how do I?', type questions. If you have any questions regarding the site itself or would like to report a community, please direct them to Lemmy.world Support or email [email protected]. For other questions check our partnered communities list, or use the search function.


Reminder: The terms of service apply here too.

Partnered Communities:

Tech Support

No Stupid Questions

You Should Know

Reddit

Jokes

Ask Ouija


Logo design credit goes to: tubbadu


founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 

Me personally? I've become much less tolerant of sexist humor. Back in the day, cracking a joke at women's expense was pretty common when I was a teen. As I've matured and become aware to the horrific extent of toxicity and bigotry pervading all tiers of our individualistic society, I've come to see how exclusionarly and objectifying that sort of 'humor' really is, and I regret it deeply.

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 year ago (3 children)

There weren't many gay people when I was growing up. At least not openly. I was first introduced to some gays at a gay bar. They basically made me feel like a juicy steak in a meat market (not in a good way). Several comments about my dick within 10 seconds of meeting them.

Today I have many gay friends that I enjoy their company but that was a huge setback for me.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 year ago

Did you tell them your name? Because I think that might have led them to make some assumptions.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 year ago (1 children)

It took one of those meat market experiences to make me self-reflect about how I treated women as a straight man.

Thankfully I was relatively young when it happened, but I'll always regret how I treated women before then.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 year ago

You know what, I never treated women that way but I certainly gained a lot of empathy for them after that.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago (3 children)

It's crazy to me now that there wasn't a single (open) trans or gay person in my high school in the 90s. I sometimes wonder who actually was, but wasn't able to be themselves.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago

My high school class was in mid-'00s, and there was one girl who very much had that butch/tomboy vibe going on. I drifted away from the class, so only heard rumours after graduation, but I think she never actually came out as anything. On the other hand three others of us (two of whom, including myself, I never would have guessed back in high school) eventually came out as various shades of queer :D

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago

There were a couple of people who were "different" that, in hindsight, it was very obvious they were "confused". Some of them came out later but were much less obvious.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

I was in high school in the late 70s and early 80s. Nobody was out. But people kind of knew. One time I was on a train into the city (San Francisco), and I saw two students along with one of our teachers headed there. I thought that was kind of cool, but seemed also a bit dangerous and ill-advised at the time. I am fairly certain that our very popular senior class president was gay. Very sadly, he took his own life.