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At what age do you think is too old to be living with parents? (lemmy.world)

submitted 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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Background+rant: I'm in my early to mid-20s and still living at home with my dad. I'm not a NEET and am employed at a normal office job. I enjoy the comfort of my home. I like being with family (and I believe they feel blessed to have their kid at home longer). I like not having to pay rent. However, I also keep feeling some nagging pressure to "grow up and leave the nest".

Everything in my mind tells me that moving out is irrational. I would lose 1/3rd of my income to rent, go through a bunch of logistical hoops to find a new place, lose the last few moments I have with my family, just so I can prove to nobody that I'm independent, maybe discover new things, and also probably get in on some of that loneliness action that the rest of my generation is going through.

Yet, the pressure is still there. No one looks down on me for it, but I feel a bit embarrassed to tell people I'm living at home, like I'm admitting failure or incompetency. My friends will occasionally ask when I'm planning on moving out and the question just lingers longer than it should in my head. I compare myself to my parents and grandparents and can't help but feel like a child compared to the people they were when they were at my age.

Obviously quite conflicted on this, so I'm interested in seeing what others have to say.

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[–] [email protected] 104 points 8 months ago (3 children)

It's worth noting that the stigma is very much a cultural thing. There are cultures where it's very normal for the kids to stay with the parents, even after they get married, with multiple generations under one roof.

You should 100% do what makes you and your family happy. If things change, you can make changes.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 8 months ago (1 children)

yeah my parents would be pretty upset if I left them unless demanded by job or something

[–] [email protected] 16 points 8 months ago

Good thing is that them being upset doesn't stop you from moving out if it's better for you.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

The stigma also doesn’t even correlate with any current numbers. The expectation to move out at a young age is the strongest in the USA where more young adults up to their early 30s are living with their parents than young Europeans do for example. I guess it‘s a remnant from the urban sprawl boom and the general mindset still needs some time to adapt to the current reality.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 8 months ago

With how high housing prices are I'm starting to wonder if the whole stigma was dreamed up by real estate companies to increase demand. Wouldn't be the first time a whole cultural norm was created for profit.