this post was submitted on 27 Jan 2024
171 points (94.3% liked)

Ask Lemmy

27027 readers
762 users here now

A Fediverse community for open-ended, thought provoking questions

Please don't post about US Politics. If you need to do this, try [email protected]


Rules: (interactive)


1) Be nice and; have funDoxxing, trolling, sealioning, racism, and toxicity are not welcomed in AskLemmy. Remember what your mother said: if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all. In addition, the site-wide Lemmy.world terms of service also apply here. Please familiarize yourself with them


2) All posts must end with a '?'This is sort of like Jeopardy. Please phrase all post titles in the form of a proper question ending with ?


3) No spamPlease do not flood the community with nonsense. Actual suspected spammers will be banned on site. No astroturfing.


4) NSFW is okay, within reasonJust remember to tag posts with either a content warning or a [NSFW] tag. Overtly sexual posts are not allowed, please direct them to either [email protected] or [email protected]. NSFW comments should be restricted to posts tagged [NSFW].


5) This is not a support community.
It is not a place for 'how do I?', type questions. If you have any questions regarding the site itself or would like to report a community, please direct them to Lemmy.world Support or email [email protected]. For other questions check our partnered communities list, or use the search function.


Reminder: The terms of service apply here too.

Partnered Communities:

Tech Support

No Stupid Questions

You Should Know

Reddit

Jokes

Ask Ouija


Logo design credit goes to: tubbadu


founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 

I think I got a crush on my dance instructor. Which fucking sucks for all the obvious reasons. Normally I wouldn't be so worried. BUT I JUST HAD A GODDAMN ROMANTIC DREAM ABOUT HER. Seriously I just woke up from a dream about her confessing her love to me and me eagerly doing the same about her.

So how do you stop a crush from developing further? Because this is a well from which only disappointment may be drawn.

Edit: I am single btw.

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] [email protected] 13 points 10 months ago (3 children)

Tell her. Then she likely rejects your feelings, and you distance yourself from her to kill the feelings.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 10 months ago (1 children)

This is what I was thinking.

Either she rejects and that's a big turn off for the very obvious reason of her not wanting to be with OP (or it should be), or she accepts and it could be great. Nothing to lose.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 10 months ago

Yeah that's based on this Doctor's talk on avoiding friendzone https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KtkL40jRLvU

I learned this the hard way and it hurts a lot still

[–] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

Yeah. It's super scary but it's really the most optimal route. I fell in love with a friend, told her, she said she doesn't feel the same way but we still remain friends and after a period of awkwardness it got back to the way it was before. We live in different parts of the world most of the year so nothing would really change one way or another, but still, it was easier to get things out in the open.

Just should tell her in a non-creepy casual way and it should be fine.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 10 months ago (1 children)

That would most likely make being in the class awkward as well.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)

Lol that's not even close to real awkwardness of letting romantic feelings develop to crazy levels and end up friendzoned or worse. We need to be men and avoid falling a victim to our own naivety.

Also, that's also why I said to distance from her, which includes not taking classes with her anymore.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 10 months ago

What if it's the only dance class in the area?