My theory is that they are living in a world of hierarchies and apologizing is admitting a mistake, which takes them down a few levels on the hierarchy of power/popularity.
this post was submitted on 15 Jun 2023
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I'm talking about those chronically unable to apologize, and that don't seem able to learn here.
Some people have trouble separating actions and character, so admitting to committing a mistake becomes emotionally as admitting they're bad persons, and that threatens their sense of identity.
The emotional connection to their wrongdoing isn't guilt, but shame for who they are.
It's connected to low self esteem, in the worst cases to narcissism.
Yass! I got out of a relationship with a narcissist in Oct/Feb. She was unable to apologize for anything the entire time. It was like she has this mortal fear of apologizing. It was incredibly hurtful to say the least, but interesting as a case study. She was seriously incapable of taking accountability.