this post was submitted on 15 Nov 2023
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I have a friend who was a classic Catholic libertarian in college--he held some views on trans rights, abortion, and economic justice that I find deeply disagreeable. It made conversations a little tricky because there were a whole set of topics I couldn't bring up unless I wanted to wade into a debate immediately; sometimes I did, but often I just wanted to hang out and chill and that was hampered.
It took him exactly one year of being out of college and working a real job to realize that his economic views were fucked, and the whole rest of it unraveled from there. He's now a staunch leftist, and it's way, way easier to hang out with him.
That's not, however, to say it's not worth having friends you disagree with. We remained friends because we were able to disagree productively, and I feel I understand my own political views far better for all those long nights discussing them. Still, it was a friendship that took unusual effort to maintain.
My BIL is a Catholic Libertarian. Almost forty and still lives with Mom and Dad, so he never had the brush with reality that your friend went through. He thinks he's politically savvy and always wants "civil debate" with me, but he's utterly insufferable.
I'm not looking forward to Thanksgiving next week.