this post was submitted on 07 Jul 2023
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submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
 

Why YSK: These email tips are helpful for people who struggle with boundaries and want to communicate more assertively.

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[–] [email protected] 325 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (4 children)

Some of these are good, some are just needlessly assertive nonsense. Especially the two where it's actively refusing to acknowledge fault or apologize for it, which is standard PR crap. Refusing to apologize and instead saying "thanks for your patience" is what I expect to hear from my ISP when they miss their scheduled install, not from a coworker.

There's nothing wrong with being a normal human being that is capable of admitting their own shortcomings. If never saying sorry means "being a boss" then that explains why there's so many sociopaths as CEOs.

"Hope that make sense?" Vs "Let me know if you have any questions."

The latter is saying "here's the explanation, figure it out, bother me again if you can't". The fromer, while poorly worded, is being helpful, actively attempting to make sure the person understands before leaving them to it. It's both a kindness and doing your due diligence.

[–] [email protected] 107 points 1 year ago

Seriously.. and oftentimes just combining both works better. "Hey sorry I'm late, I appreciate you all being patient" or "Hope that all makes sense, but please feel free to ask any questions if they come up"

[–] [email protected] 76 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I’m so happy to see a sane comment at the top here. So many of these are just stupid and border on alpha male don’t take not shit or admit fault crap.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I think it goes the other way too. For people that tend to apologize too much, even when it’s not their fault, mixing in a “thanks for your patience” is a good way to balance it out a bit.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I'm torn. I feel like admitting guilt and owning up to your failures is a virtue, but I'm not sure the rest of the world agrees with me

Neurotypical enough to read body language, neurodivergent enough to never understand why

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

I’m with you. Just being honest about a failure is fine. Doesn’t have to be a dramatic apology, just an acknowledgment with a bit of regret perhaps.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

That makes sense. I think that’s a different issue than I was thinking. Ultimately if it’s a sincere comment I think that’s the most important thing.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago

"Thank you for your patience" gives me such a visceral reaction, lol

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

Agreed! It’s like…. You know we’re emailing other people too right? Not everyone is a delicate fucking flower that needs to be coddled. Yes there are better ways to word stuff, but typing as a medium often just leaves too much up to interpretation. A difficult conversation should be discussed on a call.