this post was submitted on 30 Oct 2023
65 points (95.8% liked)

Autism

6876 readers
3 users here now

A community for respectful discussion and memes related to autism acceptance. All neurotypes are welcome.

We have created our own instance! Visit Autism Place the following community for more info.

Community:

Values

  • Acceptance
  • Openness
  • Understanding
  • Equality
  • Reciprocity
  • Mutuality
  • Love

Rules

  1. No abusive, derogatory, or offensive post/comments e.g: racism, sexism, religious hatred, homophobia, gatekeeping, trolling.
  2. Posts must be related to autism, off-topic discussions happen in the matrix chat.
  3. Your posts must include a text body. It doesn't have to be long, it just needs to be descriptive.
  4. Do not request donations.
  5. Be respectful in discussions.
  6. Do not post misinformation.
  7. Mark NSFW content accordingly.
  8. Do not promote Autism Speaks.
  9. General Lemmy World rules.

Encouraged

  1. Open acceptance of all autism levels as a respectable neurotype.
  2. Funny memes.
  3. Respectful venting.
  4. Describe posts of pictures/memes using text in the body for our visually impaired users.
  5. Welcoming and accepting attitudes.
  6. Questions regarding autism.
  7. Questions on confusing situations.
  8. Seeking and sharing support.
  9. Engagement in our community's values.
  10. Expressing a difference of opinion without directly insulting another user.
  11. Please report questionable posts and let the mods deal with it. Chat Room
  • We have a chat room! Want to engage in dialogue? Come join us at the community's Matrix Chat.

.

Helpful Resources

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
[email protected]
65
Does anyone else hyperfocus on a friendship? (sopuli.xyz)
submitted 1 year ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
36 comments fedilink hide all child comments
 

When I make a new friend online and we hang out a lot in a short space of time, I find myself hyperfocusing on wanting to interact with them. I try my best to hold myself back to what would be an acceptable level. It gets to a point where I feel like almost nothing else matters but their next response.

Does anyone else have this? If so, is there a coping technique I can do to reduce it or make it more bearable?

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Hobbies help a bit, but the problem is they start to give my brain less and less value when I have a new favourite person so to speak.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Yeah, I understand that. I haven't found an easy solution to that.

With hobbies, the thing I've found most useful is to set a structure of making that time for myself to do the thing I enjoy. Even if it's just an hour or two, one evening a week. That way I've mentally created the space where I can say "that time is for me, to do my hobby". Sticking with it, even if I think "I'd rather be with my favourite person at this time" helps add some balance (plus it's a defence against that feeling of neglecting myself when I'm hyperfocused on someone else).

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

That's a good idea, unfortunately I have trouble sticking to times unless I'm letting someone else down

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Well I don't know if it helps, but the way I think of that is that if I didn't stick to the times, I'd be letting me down.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Sounds like a good thing to be honest

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

My hobbies losing value is a good thing?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Sorry I misread that. Thought you said hobbies cause you to place less thoughts on friendship

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

Oh I can see that, my bad.