this post was submitted on 20 Sep 2023
46 points (89.7% liked)

UKCasual

6073 readers
2 users here now

A friendly place to chat.

No politics please. Don't be a dick.

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 

Not his first attempt, but I want to do whatever I can to encourage him to stay on the wagon this time. I don't have any experience of this, so I'd appreciate any tips from those who have been there already.

Edit 02/10: he's still clean!

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

The bottom line truth is that unless you really truly want to give up, you won't. Your friend is really the only one who knows if that's true for them or not.

Most smokers have times and places they associate with smoking - in the old days it was being in the pub. Also, after meals, when work ends, lunchbreaks etc. Those are the times to try and keep them distracted.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Hope you don’t mind me chiming in from the US… I’m approaching 2 years without smoking. I can’t really say if there was any one thing that helped me quit, but I had smoked about a pack a day for the last 20 years.

When I decided to quit (I’ve stopped for months at a time in the past, but never seriously) I made the decision that I wouldn’t smoke again and quit cold turkey. I kept the same routines though: having a beer with friends after work, going outside with them when they smoked, and going outside at work when my colleagues smoked. I enjoyed the smell of the secondhand smoke, but I enjoyed the socializing and camaraderie more and it didn’t really tempt me all that much. It was more about the commitment that I made in my head when I decided to quit smoking that kept me from lighting up. The cravings sucked at first, but it is somewhat like mourning a dead loved one. Always horrible, you’ll forever miss it, and eventually it sucks a little less.

I did miss smoking the most when travelling for work. There is a bit of a language barrier where I go most often, and I hadn’t realized how much I used smoking as a crutch when I needed to get away and feel comfortable. It still just came down to me not wanting to disappoint the inner me, however.

I don’t know if that makes sense, and I don’t know how to really explain it better. I hope something in that jumble of words helps though.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Chime away :)

It was more about the commitment that I made in my head when I decided to quit smoking that kept me from lighting up

That's the key - that commitment. Interesting that you found it OK to not change your habits to avoid smokers etc. I would've found that torture.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

It’s different for everyone. I hang out at a coffeehouse and most of my friends there are smokers. If I didn’t see them for a month or two while I quit smoking, that would be torture.