No shit they don’t do the same with her. You give them freedoms she doesn’t and she has to be the parent. Any kid will go to the less responsible parent for being more “fun”.

The example you gave, we will presume it’s the worst of your complaints, And it’s such a non complaint it seems ridiculous you’d use it as an example. You gave your diabetic child pure sugar and you’re blaming your ex for giving a shit about that?! You can’t be real. You can’t seriously think doing shit like that then expecting a constant smiling happy wife to come thank you for doing it! Go get yourself a trad wife who doesn’t work if you want to weirdly abuse your kids or grow the fuck up before you trick another woman into dealing with a man baby.