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this post was submitted on 13 Jul 2026
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No Stupid Questions
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No such thing. Ask away!
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I think there are a lot of things at play here. Ultimately I don't think you should, though.
The fact that you still want to tell them is suspicious. I think you're not being honest with yourself. Your ulterior end game is a hope of some type of reciprocation. You haven't moved on.
Just because (assuming it's even true) a statistical model of a gender says "they probably would like it" is irrelevant. Would this individual like to hear it? It sounds like you don't know. If you don't know them well enough to anticipate how they would react, then I think it's pretty safe to say they don't know you well enough to receive the message "I used to love you" in a way that could ever come out as a net benefit to them.
I empathize immensely regarding your position. But as a 3rd party observer, don't do it.
Additionally, even if there is no reciprocation expected, from their perspective, they will think this is in the hopes of reciprocation. And the more OP tries to convince them it's not, the less convincing it will be. That kind of contact, regarding feelings from the past, just makes one instantly defensive and apprehensive about the idea that they may soon have to rebuff an advance. Which means finding any excuse to not socialize, respond to texts only minimally, don't do anything which could feed into the idea that you are getting closer to them which could provoke an advance with underlying expectations and potentially a negative reaction upon rejection. It's an inherently uncomfortable situation because of that underlying subtext of motive that doesn't go away with any amount of explanation. There are many routes into so many open hearts out in the world. But this route does not lead to love, platonic or otherwise.