This should be a whole community.

"I want to meet straight woman in local public spaces to form heterosexual relationships with them. On the way to those spaces, sometimes I get so excited about kissing a woman and liking it that I just trip on my untied shoelaces and fall mouth first onto men's erect gay penises? I HATE confrontation, so as I'm already there, I just finish the job so the person doesn't get upset. Is this happening to anyone else?"

"Is there a way to play pickleball, as an EXTREMELY straight man, without inevitably having sex with all the men right on the court Every. Single. Time? I just wanted a healthy hobby so I could exercise and attract more non-gay women for handjobs, breast holding and more. Other straight dudes, what have you done in the past when this has happened to you?"

"I'm big on two things; water preservation and NOT being gay. Obviously those things might conflict when you realize you have to ask your two male roommates to start showering with you as a third, straight male. The most efficient use of the water is obviously if we all stand under the one steam together, backs to fronts in a circle? How would you do this in the straightest way?"