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this post was submitted on 03 Jun 2026
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Dad Jokes
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This is a community for sharing those cheesy “dad” jokes that invoke an eye roll or chuckle.
Rules
- Clean jokes only please. If you cannot tell this joke to a 5-year-old and they can understand, you probably shouldn’t post it here. Please post edgier jokes to: !unclejokes@lemmy.world
- Adult topics with which to be cautious or avoided: drugs, sex, death, racism.
- Must post text, image (e.g., meme), or direct link. Do not post external links that cannot be viewed directly from the community (e.g., link to joke website, Facebook, Instagram, etc.)
- Follow Lemmy.World Code of Conduct
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Everyone’s an asshole to someone.
And sometimes people hurt other people, and they hold a grudge against the people they hurt, and perhaps even hate them for it.
Shit’s unfair, humans are messy.
I try to be good to almost but not entirely everyone.
See that’s where we differ, I’m an asshole to everyone! Because I’m the CIA and that’s how we do!
That’s entirely fair, and I apologize for last night, when I took the Shit That Won’t Quit™ and your boss said you’d be docked pay if you flinched away from watching.
Not gonna lie, I was both disgusted and impressed at the same time, kinda like when you drive past a horrific car crash and can’t stop looking
I'm not anybodys enemy. I'm the person you forget you had any interaction with. The kind of person that daily employees still don't know my name after working there for 7+ years.